Coping with Christmas

[FedUpWaiting]

I had my gastric bypass on 3rd December 2012 and just into the puree stage. Ive been coping ok with the diet but now Christmas is approaching and I am gettin worried about coping with Christmas and the food associated with it. I am avoiding visiting people in case they want me to eat and its the wrong food. I know I am probably being silly but I am so scared of the dumping.
My father in law got us a huge hamper for christmas 99% of which I cant have. It has most of my *old* fav treats in it so I was kinda upset and had *moment* having to unpack the thing. Hubby says he doesnt want to eat it either because I cant and he feels guilty so now I have lots of food I cant eat and hubby wont eat.
Oh the joys of Christmas and its not even here yet! Dreading Christmas day my Mums already warned me not to *upset* people cos I'm not eating much (im taking my own food) and has asked me just to go into the other room if people feel uncomfortable eating when i am there.
I wish Christmas was over with already this is all to much and I keep bursting into tears :cry:
Am I the only one struggling with this? Why is Christmas so focussed on food that isnt good for you

 

[dejnablue]

You are not alone, believe me! Every social gathering is difficult once you.v had WLS!
Try not to stress too much and maybe fib a little...Am on the puree food stage too and have found blaming Norovirus (it's everywhere!) For not eating much worked well plus ppl will give you space as they'll prob still be scared of catching it!
Enjoy ur fav food, it's all about small quantities so you won't be able to eat as much as you used to. Calorie intake will still be much lower than before.. Enjoy it! Resume diet after..
It's all about working hard all year round and playing hard at special occasions.
Hope it helps

 

[shelleymarie]

I really feel for you Fedupwaiting, I think you could do with a little more support. I mean I don't think it will hurt people to be a bit more understanding for one Christmas. You shouldn't have to go in the other room so others don't feel uncomfortable! that's outrageous. You've not got a disease, you are taking care of your self and investing in your future. If you get time to read this before you go, please just tell people to enjoy their food and you will enjoy what you can manage. You are so early on you couldn't even begin to eat any of the rubbish they will be shovelling in but this time next year you will be able to have a nice small plate of the usual yummy food but hopefully making healthier choices and definitely with a healthier, happier body! It's just a few days and it's all over. What you and your hubby don't want from the hamper, give the rest to the local homeless shelter. You will not only feel amazing for what you've done for yourself but for others too. Hope you manage to have a nice Christmas, it's not just about food and hopefully you can feel that this year and maybe your relatives can learn that from you too! take care xx

 

[Karlos]

Your mum sounds like a right sort LOL but I can see her point. Your father in law could do with some empathy training too LOL. Well done your other half on supporting you over the dangerous hamper, I'd bag it all up and take it a homeless shelter or old folks sheltered accomodation place where those who have less could get benefit from it.

As for coping with not eating, well get used to it because it's a new way of life and a much better one. however you can always taste the good foods you loved in time just in moderation so future years will be a breeze, and this one is so close to you surgery you won't miss eating too much anyway. Just avoid saying sorry I can't eat this all the time, and make it very clear that you want everyone to just get on and eat whatever, and as much as they want, but that right now you have to be careful for a little while. If they are uncomfortable with that then it's they that should chuff off out of there not you. Just remember why you did this and think of how geat your new life will be 365 days of future years and don't let one day spoil that for you

Good luck xxx

 

[JO28172]

You are not alone, believe me! Every social gathering is difficult once you.v had WLS!
Try not to stress too much and maybe fib a little...Am on the puree food stage too and have found blaming Norovirus (it's everywhere!) For not eating much worked well plus ppl will give you space as they'll prob still be scared of catching it!
Enjoy ur fav food, it's all about small quantities so you won't be able to eat as much as you used to. Calorie intake will still be much lower than before.. Enjoy it! Resume diet after..
It's all about working hard all year round and playing hard at special occasions.
Hope it helps

I'd disagree and say that in a few months social gatherings can and should be just as enjoyable as they used to be. It's only awkward now as you're on purée. Once you've found your mojos and are on normal textured foods you'll be fine...just no longer piggies
Stuff what others think cos by this time next year you'll be strutting your stuff with pride having achieved new found slimness!
Try not to let others get the better of you and if worse comes to worse..feed them up instead
Xx

 

[julesburns]

Oh Hun. It sounds like you've got a bit of a tough few days ahead!!
I was wrapped last Tuesday in Prague. My family and friends are aware of my surgery so i don't need to make excuses to avoid eating but I imagine its hard with extended family coming!!. I'm on purée stage now so sat with my family and had some mash and carrot and turnip. Both were delicious, I used a saucer to eat. Only managed 5 spoons and felt full, but just left it and carried on chatting. No one cared!! I didn't feel left out or anything. I just missed the turkey but its no big deal! I even managed a little bit of custard off the top of the trifle for dessert.
Last night I sat With my family and watched tv and while they devoured a box of thorntons with wine, I had a glass of water and let 1/2 a square of plain chocolate melt in my mouth. It was amazing!!! I forgot how good food tastes when you eat things slowly and let them fill your whole mouth!!
Hun, just enjoy what you can and remember that Christmas is 1 day and just enjoy being with your family and friends. Anyone who feels uncomfortable about you eating small portions is silly!!! Xxxxxxxxxx

 

[rickysmrs]

Hope it wasnt to eventful for you great advise above enjoy as much as you can and ignore the haters xxx

 

[Yvessa]

Wow - I'm shocked by your families attitude. Personally, (because I'm a stubborn so and so) I would make sure I didn't go into another room and spend the whole day letting the rest of the family know in an oblique way what mum said. This journey is impossible without support, kudos to your hubby and I hope that you can find a solution with your hamper, but I would seriously recommend a frank conversation with your parents. Are they going to hide you in another room for the rest of you life? Because you will never be able to eat the way you used to.

 

[chrisa]

iTS SAD THAT SOME PEOPLE JUST DONT GET THIS WLS SURGERY AND HOW DESPERATE WE WERE TO TAKE THIS ROUTE AFTER FAILURE AFTER FAILURE TO LOSE WEIGHT. tHE OPERATIONS THEMSELVES CAN BE LIFE THREATENING AS ARE ALL OPS HOWEVER IT IS A NEW WAY OF LIFE AND WE HAVE TO ADAPT AND TELL THEM HOW IT IS AND GUNA BE. WE HAVE TO LEARN TO STAND UP FOR OURSELVES AND LET THEM KNOW THAT THE WAY WE EAT NOW DOES NOT AFFECT THEM WHATSO EVER. i MYSELF HAD A SIMILAR SITUATION TO DAY MY INLAWS MADE A COMNMENT ABOUT MAKING LUNCH FOR HUBBY N ME N THAT WE WOULD ONLY NEED ENOUGH FOR 1 AND A BIT PEOPLE WAS IT WORTH IT. i SAID EXCUSE ME JUST BECAUSE i DON'T EAT HUGE AMOUNTS DOES NOT MEAN WE CAN;T MAKE A NICE MEAL AND BOTH ENJOY IT AND THTA I WILL PUT MYSELF A PLATE UP FOR TOMORROW AS WELL. dON'THINJK THEY WILL COMMENT NEXT TIME. WE ENJOYED OUR LUNCH SOME OF MINE WENT IN THE BIN BUT THATS WHAT HAPPENS MOST MEALS i ALWAYS TRY N EAT PROTEIN N VEG 1ST CARBS LAST USUALLT CARBS THAT ARE LEFT BUT MEAL DOESNT LOOK THA SAME WITHOUT THEM BUT FEEL BETTER IF THEY ARE THERE WETHER i EAT ANY OR NOT. wE ALL LEARN THE HARD WAY BUT YOU WILL GET USED TO IT XX