Feeling deflated

[LET.ME.OUT.OF.THIS.BODY]

I attended SRH today feeling quite excited as at my last appointmnet n feb i was set a weight loss target of 7lb and told that if i hit that target today i would be put on the waiting list. so feeling rather pleased with myself for loosing 2st i arrived for my 4:30 appointment prepared with my list of questions, i finally got in to see the Doctor (whos name i didnt catch) after an hour of waiting on to be told that i now have to wait 2-4 months for an endoscopy and only then will i be put on the list. Apparently this came in 6 weeks ago that the surgeons have to ensure their patients have had all their investigations before they go on the list which is obviously just to buy them more time so they can hit their targets.
in February the dietician said she would refer me for pschology with Mr Wills as i was keen to explore why i have become the way i am but today the Dr asked me if i wanted to be referred to MR Wills and maybe he could help me "GET MY ACT TOGETHER" (Those were his words) or go ahead with surgery, i was under the impression i had already been referred and have been waiting almost 5 months for an appointment to fall on the mat and at no time was i told it was one or the other as he suggested today.
The Dr was in the room for no longer than 10 minutes and spent the last 5 of those stood at the door waiting to leave, i felt i was really putting him out when i said "i have a few questions shall i keep them until my next appointment?" he did come back in and sat down but i was very conscious that given his clinic was running an hour late i was probably keeping him from his tea, i didnt feel comfortable to ask half of the questions i had put on my list and left feeling really deflated and upset especially when i was walking across the car park with the words "GET MY ACT TOGETHET" running through my head, is that what he really thinks? that i should get my act together? well frankly i think he is in the wrong line of work. as a nurse i wouldnt dream of tell one of my patients to "get their act together".
Rant over i'm going to write to someone as i feel so strobgly about what happened today but have no idea who to write to so any ideas please let me know.
sorry i ramble so much but my head is spinning. x

 

[Big an Bouncy]

Contact PALs at the hospital and voice your opinion of how you were treated!

 

[wishing on a star]

You poor thing, im sorry I carnt help you but just wanted to say sorry you have been treated in this way:-( Gosh as if this journey isnt hard enough!!!! xxxxxxSuzannexxxxxx

 

[Jrichard]

You would hope that someone in that position would no better, what an a**e! I would definitely go to PALS. You deserve to be treated with respect.

 

[LET.ME.OUT.OF.THIS.BODY]

Thanks i hadnt thought of PALS i will get in touch with them today. Yesterdays appointment was such a contrast from my first appointment when i saw the nurse and dietician who were both sooooo lovely, understanding, imformative, knowledgable and professional. i was just really shocked yesterday and left in a daze, He wasnt going to tell me that you know have to have all investigation before going on the list he simply said he would see me for an endoscopy in 2-3 months and opened the door to leave, i called after him and asked if i would be put on the list having met my weight loss target and only then did he explain that no i wouldnt be put on the list until after the endoscopy which he then told me would be in 3-4 months (which had early in the discussion been 2-3 months). i wish i knew his name, he did introduce himself when he walked in the room but then the consultation was over so quickly i never even got chance to ask his name again. i presume he is one of the surgeons as when i asked what hightens the risks associated with the surgery he told me that the only think within my control is my weight the rest is down to his performance on the day.

 

[Karen19745]

I am with SRH and I had the same waiting time, I saw the nurse & Dietician in Feb 2010, saw Surgeon Sept 2010, Had endoscopy Nov & Dec 2010 and had Surgery May 2011.
I'm sorry you had a bad experience, I must admit I think they're all great at SRH, Karen x

 

[novamay]

hi Lea, I had a similar experience in May for my 2nd appointment (and I was also under the impression from my 1st appointment in December 10 that I would go on the waiting list after this 2nd session if I'd met wl target.

I didn't see one of the surgeons - I saw a Consultant Registrar (young man with foreign accent) who said that as I had met the wl target they would be happy to offer me a bypass. (Ba-da-bing... or so I thought)

At the 1st session with the nurse/dietician I expressed an interest to see Dr Wells the pscyhologist to find out if there were any underlying issues that I hadn't recognised. The Registrar then explained that as this appointment was outstanding (it was two days after my appointment with himself) he would have to "suspend my application for surgery". I saw Dr Wells two days later and he said that surgery 'might not be for me' - that its too 'severe', or that I 'was not ready for the restriction' - considering that I have been restricting my food intake since Jan to meet the wl target I don't get how he came to that conclusion! He now feels that I need further counselling and psychiatric treatment (but hasn't fully explained what that will entail other than talking - which I'm not very good at face to face - I prefer to write my thoughts down otherwise I lose track of what I'm saying!). He also feels a balloon should be offered first, then I should consider not having the bypass if the balloon works (which I highly unlikely from what I've read about it) and I can get my head around why I am fat and diets don't work. I now that this thought going around in my head - why don't I give it another go and see if I can do it without the surgery; finding myself doubting my original convictions for the surgery!!!

I am now stuck in a 'no-man's land' waiting for them to decide who's opinion takes precedence. I have no timescale to work to, as Dr Well's hasn't said it could take x amount of sessions, or will plan for my balloon in x months, or so and I don't know what the next steps are other than talking to Dr Wells - and at one 30 min appointment per month its probably going to take forever! (I havent got forever - I'm 40 now and my mother died at 50; my father at 60 - both had weight related illnesses).

I wrote to SRH over six weeks ago asking for clarification on my position and what surgery, if any, was to be offered me but I haven't heard anything back.

I was told by the nurse at my 1st appointment that seeing Dr Wells would not impact on my waiting time for surgery - that I could go on the list while going through the pscyh sessions - this obviously is not the case, as Dr Wells has agreed to my application being suspended while I am in pscyh sessions.

I wish you good luck Lea - and hope that you have a smoother journey than mine.

PS I hung around for almost two hours for a 5 min consult with the Registrar - and went home in floods of tears, throughly deflated, upset and confused!!!!

 

[LET.ME.OUT.OF.THIS.BODY]

Nova, thank you so much for your response, it must be so frustrating for you to be in that situation. it seems we have had some similar experiences on our weight loss journey. i too was told at the 1st appointment with the nurse and deitician that seeing Dr Wells wouldnt effect my being placed on the waiting list for surgery. i suspect we may have seen the same Dr as well as he was a young Asian man, he did introduce himself to me when he entered the room but i didnt quite catch his name and it was last thing on my mind when i left less than 10 minutes later in a daze. He basically sat down looked at my file and said "so you are 30 now, why are you wanting to see Mr Wells? you are a psychiatric nurse so you know how all this works and you are doing well you have lost 2 st" (well no not really i dont know how it "works" and i have lost 2 stone about 6 times in the last 10 years and every time i gain 3 so thats why i want to see him to explore why this happens?) Which is when he said well if you want to see him maybe he can help you to "get your act together" or if you want to go ahead with the surgery fine but you are only young and maybe Mr wells can help you. i was in such a daze wondering if i got the wrong end of the stick thinking i had already been referred to him which would help along with the surgery. He made me feel pressure to choose so i said in that case i want to go ahead with the surgery, he scribbled in my notes, stood up shook my hand and said i will see you in 2-3 months for endoscopy and went to leave. i stood up and said "so am i on the waiting list" and he explained that is not how it works now and again went to leave so i looked at the nurse who had sat in the corner saying nothing and i asked her if i was to bring my list of questions to my next appointment which is when he turned round and stepped back into the room saying oh you didnt mention questions (well no i didnt but you didnt ask either)i told him he seemed in a hurry so he sat down and answered my questions but it was quite an uncomfortable consultation, not at all like my first appointment. and like you i left feeling Deflated, upset and unsure if i was making the right decision with the surgery or if should stick with weight watchers GET MY ACT TOGETHER and see if i can crack it this time.
i am pleased i only live up the road as i know people travel quite a distance for these appointments, waiting for hours to be seen for less than 10 minutes.
who did you write to?

 

[novamay]

Thanks Lea, its very frustrating when you can't get a straight answer from anyone.... or any answer at all!

The Registrar I saw wasn't Asian - he was European. He was ok I guess, and he did ask if I had any questions, but I was too speechless with shock after what he'd said about not going ahead until the pscyh session had been held, I did'nt get out my long list of questions that I'd prepared.

I wrote FAO Mr Small, Bariatric Surgery team the hospital.

I was also told by the Registrar that my sleep apnea results hadn't come through from Darlington hospital and these would have to be chased. So I phoned Mr Small's secretary the following day because I wasnt sure if this was something that I should do, or the hospital would chase. I was told that they "don't do the chasing up - that I would have to do it..." - only to have a copy of a letter sent to my GP from SRH pop through my letter box four weeks later asking my GP to chase the results from Darlington. By this time, I'd already been in contact with Darlington and got the results (long story!)

Boy do I wish I had the money to go private!

 

[Ready For Change]

I do believe the man in question may be Dr Shroder, I met with him in feb and he did the exact same thing to me as he did to you, kept me waiting for over an hour and a half for a 5 minute 'chat' which was no more than him stating the obvious i.e you have got to your target weight, now you will have an endoscopy (which was in may) and it will be decided then. Worst thing was is that he stood in the doorway for the whole '5' mins he was there and kept looking at his watch. All the upset from that made me doubt my decision. But I've beaten the waiting game and go in next saturday to have my op. From group seminar to surgery is exactly 13 months. Good luck and more importantly, good health
Katie xxx

 

[jema]

Hi all. I'm also under Mr. Small, but I believe he is out of the country 'til August (serving in Afghanistan) so others are taking his clinics. I have been told that the way they're doing things has changed in the past couple of months in order to cope with huge number of patients being referred to them. I am also led to believe that one of the surgeons has only recently completed to do this surgery and that is why some people may find things moving after a long wait.

I had an appointment with Dr. Mahawar at Monkwearmouth hospital last week, and it took me an hour to get there for a 5 minute slot. I was also (surprisingly) told I would only go on the list after the all clear from the endoscopy, which will be another 3-4 months away. I have already waited 16 months to get this far and it looks like I have another 10 months to go for my op. (he told me a further 6 months wait after the endoscopy).

In my opinion, if the level of care is affected because of the number of patients, then the trust needs to be looking at recruiting more staff to specialise in bariatrics. This will lead to more clinics and therefore a little more time for each patient. I know the response would be lack of money, but I think the money from the car parking machines should just about cover it!!

 

[suzz69uk]

Aww I am sorry you are having issues. I too had alot of problems at first with cancellations. Eventually 2 months later I received an appointment with Mr Schreoder he was on time for me but it was literally a 5 minute appointment to say well done, I will put you on the list for Endoscopy. I waited around 6/8 weeks for endoscopy and thankfully am now on the pre op diet ready for surgery on the 24th of this month!

Well done on your weight loss and stick with it, unfortunately it is a waiting game and the appointments do come round eventually.

Hugs. xxx

 

[LET.ME.OUT.OF.THIS.BODY]

You have all been very informative an supportive THANK YOU. i went for my Endoscopy with Mr Balpuri on Friday 2nd September and was told that i would be put on the list that day so Hurray progress i am on the list. im pleased to tell any of you who are still waiting that i only waited 8 weeks for my endoscopy which is the better end of 2-4 months. I am hoping for a surgery date of around the end of Feb 2012 but a little worried as ive book a short UK break for March 12th. if my calculations are correct my journey from GP referral will have been 21 months.

 

[jema]

Did it help in any way the amount of weight you lost between appointments?

 

[TwinkleTwinkle]

Gosh, what a waiting game you have all had ... Hope everything goes smoothly for you from now on

 

[lynne08]

You have all been very informative an supportive THANK YOU. i went for my Endoscopy with Mr Balpuri on Friday 2nd September and was told that i would be put on the list that day so Hurray progress i am on the list. im pleased to tell any of you who are still waiting that i only waited 8 weeks for my endoscopy which is the better end of 2-4 months. I am hoping for a surgery date of around the end of Feb 2012 but a little worried as ive book a short UK break for March 12th. if my calculations are correct my journey from GP referral will have been 21 months.

Hi Lea, that's fantastic news! I've had the same journey as you with SRH and had endoscopy on 21st July and put on list. I rang the secretary last week just to double check that I was actually on the list, as I've assumed before and they had me down as not wanting to proceed! give them a call in a couple of weeks just to confirm.

did they say the waiting list was 4-6 months ?

Lynne
xxx

 

[LET.ME.OUT.OF.THIS.BODY]

Did it help in any way the amount of weight you lost between appointments?

hi jema, sorry for the very late reply but i still struggle to navigate my way arounf=d this site and have just found your post. i dont think it make a massive difference how much you loose but i was told at the meeting i had with the surgeon that the more weight i lost pre op the better as the lighter i am the less the risks are with surgery.
x