Heart scan failure

[gingernutter]

Once again my weight has got in the way of my health. Today i attended hospital for a CT scan on my heart. I didn't think about what was involved, I just read the hospital pamphlet and I arrived on time. For those of you who might be worried about a CT scan read no further. Firstly the hospital didn't have a hospital gown big enough to cover me. I had to walk out with my body only half covered. I made fun of myself to cover my embarrassment. My scan was in a do-nut shaped tunnel. I had to be wired up to a heart monitor, I had to hold my arms above my head (I have a frozen shoulder so this was so painful). I almost filled the gap in do-nut scanner. I had to stay very still and hold my breath briefly while they scanned my heart. I was in agony! I feel as if I was chocking. I couldn't breath. I felt like the fat around my neck was going to suffocate me. I was so scared, I was screaming inside. I had to do this twice but I couldn't manage it. I had to call a holt to it. I had a panic attack. I was shouting and crying to get me out. The doctor offered me sedation but I was too distressed. I just wanted out. I am so angry with myself. Why did I allow myself to become so over weight. I feel like I am a monster! today is just another day in the life of a fat women who couldn't fit in the gap. The theater and cinema are also out of the question for me. nowdays.

 

[tracey113]

so sorry to hear your story, it sounds awful. Don't beat yourself up about your weight. how many subscribers are on this forum and have all probably thought the same thing. Your doing something about it and thats what counts

 

[shelbell]

I agree, don't feel bad about it, just use it as your incentive to carry on with this journey! You're not wallowing in your weight issues, you're doing something about them, so that's something to be proud of!

 

[gingernutter]

Thankyou Shel and Tracy.

 

[cazbandy]

Its tough sometimes being big but just remember, you are not going to be like it forever.

Be proud of yourself for facing the demons and know YOU are making the difference.

I wish you all the luck and strength in the world.

:grouphugg:

 

[charliegirl]

Sarah I have sent you an email chick....xx

 

[serenitylove]

my mum works for radiology and believe me hun from what you have said it sounds like a reaction alot of people get from being in scanner feel for you babe xx

 

[sue121]

oh sarah im sorry u had a horrid time..:crylease believe me wen i say your not alone hun theres lots of us out there had these embarassing things happen ... wen i go the hosi if i get a sniff of having 2 undress i always take my dressing gown... ive been there hun..im sending u )))))HUGZ((((( and i hope u feel better chin up it wont be 4eva xx

 

[tammy]

Sarah your experience sounds really fightening for you. what you need to remember is that is for the very reasons you have described why you have made the hard decision to opt for surgery. you should be really proud of that and try to focus on what the positives will be for you. keep your chin up hun x

 

[gingernutter]

Thank you all. I feel much better reading your replies.

I have now decided to ask the doctor for the sleep test that i turned down last month.

 

[tracey113]

Good think positive chick and maybe it might be a good idea to take ur own dressing gown so you feel more dignified. let me know how u get on

 

[charliegirl]

That's great sarah it can tick another box....xx

 

[sue121]

oh well done sarah good for u get it done xx

 

[gingernutter]

what a night mare!

I found it hard to sleep last night after such a horrid experience with the CT scanner. I feel like I haven't slept at all. Every time I think of it I feel scared.... How silly am I? nut-case!

Thanks for all your comments