Jacci's new chapter 02/10/2010.....

[J-Mo]

I'm not interesting enough to start a diary, ha, ha!!

So I won't bore you with the story of my life/weight problem other than to say it started with an abusive alcoholic mother. She's dead now so can't put me down any more....

I look at my bypass as the start of a new chapter of my life.................

I'm on day 3 of my pre-op diet & its certainly been very emotional since I got my phone call on Tuesday. To be honest I've only lost a few lbs so I'm disappointed as I know some people have done fabulously on the pre-op diet.

I've told my son's, fella, close friends & few colleagues about my bypass but I'm upset at couple of their reactions.

One close friend was very off hand & I was relying on her for moral support. I thought she'd be happy for me but referred to it as "non-essential".

I'm even more afraid now than before about telling my lovely dad.... He'll be heart broken & worried to bits.

I go into hospital on 1st October & have my op on 2nd October. I'll be going in on my own, as I prefer it that way & it will allow me to gather my thoughts, relax etc. My fella will be there with me on the 2nd October if he's allowed. I'm honestly so independent that it doesn't bother me at all, I'm used to being on my own.

Anyway, less of my ramblings, told you I was boring...

Jacci

 

[Bev]

Jacci... I'll send my mobile number, it's there if you need it...

You are doing this for you and that's what counts... all that's gone before will be less important as you carve your life out for the better.... it's what's best for you and not others and I agree, I find that I have to go it alone on this journey with some of my closest friends and family, but I won't be deterred.

A great time to have the surgery before the really cold weather kicks in...

Keep us posted and always at your side xxx

Love and hugs xxxx

 

[cherry]

i to can offer my number, if you d like some non judgemental support!! its the only place we 'd get it from on here........ but im sending massive luck to you! and your gonna rock this bypass, and pre op, your a beautiful woman jmo..... and the world is gonna be your oyster xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[keeley86]

your not booring at all luv - that made for a nice read.. change the title and make it your diary hun! - i cant wait to read all about you and how your op goes!
egnoor your friends.... i bet that person/people are either jealous or never been fat in there lives so doesnt understand! either that or they really care for you and are worried because of the bad stories they have read, tell them to look it up because you know just like i do its not as bad as its made out in the press!
your bound to be nervous but youl be fine... not long now untill your in your new slim body buying all them luvy small size clothes for cheap prices!
i wish you all the best for op hun xxxx

 

[J-Mo]

Thanks everyone for your kind words. I'll be giving my fella my log in info for the forum so he can update you all

Thanks again you lovely lasses. Its his turn for laptop so I'm logging off for a bit now.

Jacci

 

[Neen]

You are not boring don't be a daftie x I would ask the mods to move this to the diary section and please stop apologising ! You are a lovely person and very deserving of this new lease on life, everyone has a back story and yours is no less important than anyone elses so don't dismiss your own significance my lovely xxx
We are all here because of emotional pain that has one way or the other , made us turn to food for comfort when there was no other comfort available.
Love and huggles to you hunny and you can't vent it here amongst us, who understand and identify with your feelings and problems so much..then where can you ?
x

 

[phatmomma]

Jacqui you should change the title and make this your diary. I found you didn't say much when in actual fact you said a whole lot without using words....

I'm guessing you don't want to worry your dad about your op! Do you really need to worry him, can you not fib and say your going in for something minor? You can always do a letter explaining the why's n wherefore's of why you havent told him for after your surgery...

You sound like a very strong woman and i am sure you will do absolutely wonderful after your surgery... Wishing you all the love and good health in the world xxx

 

[J-Mo]

Thanks Neen & Julie, your kind words are very supportive to me.

My dad idolised my mother, why I will never ever know but he worked away from home & does not know the extent of her alcoholism or the abuse she doled out. But he lost his wife, his mam & uncle whom he was very close to within 6 months. He has aged so much since that anyone who see's him is visibly shocked. My mam died on 22nd Dec & 4 years later, to the day, his 'little' sister died age 50 of a massive heart attack. That was just Xmas gone & ever Xmas since my mam died a family member has died. So I know he will worry himself sick.

I think I'm just going to say its ladies problems which is enough to send him running for the hills & he'll not ask any further questions. Ha, ha...

My dad has 3 younger sisters & 2 daughters yet any mention of 'ladies problems' & he looks as if he's gonna faint.

 

[Neen]

Sounds like a plan! No point in worrying him as that will add to your worry and you need to focus on being chilled as much as possible. The wonderful thing is he will see you become healthier and happier and is going to be thrilled with that x

 

[Grace]

J-Mo, it's up to you of course but I found writing a diary really helpful to me. I loved reading what you wrote, it wasn't boring at all.
Keep going on the pre-op....you'll get there honey.
Sending love and hugs
Charis xx

 

[J-Mo]

Can anyone recommend what to take to hospital?

I know there was a previous thread on here before but I can't find it!

My pre-op is scheduled for Wed 29th Sept at 2pm, hopefully they can make it a bit later so I don't have to take time off work or any time On Thursday.

I've also received my letter confirming my op date!!

ITS ALL SOOOO REAL!!! Just need to lose some more weight.

Thanks

 

[christine77]

i bet it feels like a whirlwind everything happening so quickly - just think this time next week yippeeeeeeeeeeee

 

[J-Mo]

I know Chris, its scary!!!

Today has been soooooooo hard & I have never craved food like I am now. Started off well, took my son & his friend shopping, sipped my freshly squeezed orange juice as they munch on their full English breakfast.

For some unknown reason I am craving chips?! I don't eat them normally, just 'cos I prefer pasta or rice & don't even own a chip pan or deep fat fryer. Everywhere I go I can see them, smell them & I want them.

Came home from shopping logged on here & what was the first thread? Kelly's about chips & egg!!!

Boooo hoooooo!!

I've only lost 3lb too so I'm a bit gutted as I'm on day 4 of my diet.

 

[Neen]

http://www.wlsurgery.com/wls-faqs/123002-what-really-your-hospital-bag.html

There's the thread honey xx I think what you're going through is "Oh my god I better eat it before it's too late" Syndrome...
My advice is say..I'll have some later on after recovery and by then you probably won't want them any more anyway.
If you view it that you aren't giving anything up you won't immediately start obsessing over it and go off in a desparate binge xxxxxx

By the way..most people would be beside themselves with glee if they lost 3lbs in 4 days...me being one of them!!! I've lost and gained the same flaming 6lbs since April....please stop winding yourself into a spring woman!!!

 

[J-Mo]

Ha, ha!! Neen, if it was any other time I'd be ecstatic but I was to lose another 1/2 stone so that I know I'm just under the weight I was in May when I was put on the list. Like you I have lost & gained the same 6-8lb since then.

I'm terrified I'll go for my pre-assessment only to find, like Chef Clay, that they reckon I've put weight on. Paul (Chef Clay) hadn't even put the weight on, the nurse had mis-weighed him!!! His op was cancelled as a result of the error but he's now luckily got a new date!!

Honestly, I'm in a right 'flap' with everything. Even purchasing my new pj's, slippers etc. didn't put a smile on my miserable face....

 

[Neen]

Just do what you can hunny , I'm sure it will be allright xxx Least it's not so long before the op that you stray off the path...let's face it you only have to have the extreme will power for a few more days.
Feeling panicky on top of the other worries with having the op...it's natural to feel glum at the prospect of what might go wrong...please try and let that go and focus on something nice like what gorgeous clothes you're gonna be strutting around in next summer OK?
I'll pm you x

 

[J-Mo]

Thanks Neen for those games. I'm over the moon!!!!!

Just told my dad too about my op. Seems my son & him have already been talking so he knew all about it. My son & my dad are very close, more like father & son than grand-dad & grand-son. Been that way since the day he was born. My son is named Alban & my dad Alan, my dad thinks that he's named after him when in fact its nowt to do with that!!

EEeeehh!! I'm rambling again. Off to make my other son's tea 'cos seems like the smell of food puts me off actually eating it!!

 

[Neen]

Aw good ..there you go see! We don't half put ourselves through a lot of unnessesary worry don't we?
You can reassure your family now you know more about the bypass and what to expect so hopefully ease everyones stress and worry.
When I make someone elses food I stuff a few sugar free gums in my gob...not a lot tastes very nice with zingy mint mixed into it.

 

[sugga]

Hi jmo, just read all your post and replys and would just like to wish you all the luck in the world with you up and coming op. Im glad your dad knows about your op now. My mum has alzheimers and i cant tell her about my op which is possibly in Dec because she wont understand. I have been upset this week because of this as i would love for her to know. Anyway lovey you will be ok im sure and i cant wait to follow your wls journey with you. xx

 

[Grace]

J-Mo I just wanted to send big hugs again and encouragement with your pre-op diet. Try not to worry honey, you can only do what you can do and trust it's going to be enough. I don't suppose you really could eat any less now.
I'm sure it's going to be fine!
Are you going to be able to make the Support Group meting in Sunderland on 30th? I'd love to meet you.
Charis xxx