Opinions pls...not WLS related!

[AngelEyezHoney]

Ok, so don't rly have anyone else to ask (as I have no friends!) but not sure if am over-reacting or not...
Basically, my bf was with his ex for 5yrs. They split up just over a yr ago and we have been together for 6mths.

Basically, he is going to Croatia with his exes sister in Sept to a festival...he hasnt invited me. Not that I particularly want to go but still, I just feel a bit weird knowing who he going with.

Am I being silly?! lol

 

[Lilyscent]

Hi hon, I can identify with that, my hubby is still a close friend to his ex sister in law, but he has absolutely nothing to do with his ex wife.
I used to think similar to you in the early days, we have been together 6 years now, everything I thought was totally unfounded and she is now a friend of mine too.

I guess you should ask yourself do you trust him?
Sorry if I havent been much help xx

 

[suepat10]

No, you're not being silly at all. It's a weird scenario.

Was this trip arranged before you two got together? Have you met the exes sister?

I'm really struggling to imagine how I'd feel in your situation and I don't know that is be comfortable with it xx

 

[Miss hungry]

Mmmm....I would not be happy about that. The least he can do is invite you!
It wouldn't be a trust issue for me, but not being invited would pee me off!
As you don't want to go anyway and if you completely trust him....I would just let it happen and tell him to have a nice time. (whilst feeling evil inside).
xxx

 

[AngelEyezHoney]

Nope, was planned and booked last wk! The thing that upsets me is he didn't even ask if I wanted to go.

Havent met her, although they do meet up whenever she comes into london.

He does still speak to his ex too, she lives in Leeds though so while she there it doesnt bother me!!!

Buuuuuut, he is going to a festival in July with his exes sis, his exes parents AND his ex and her bf...this one though I have forced myself on, even though I'll prob find it EXTREMELY awkward and try to leave within a few hrs lol I've told him I'm going to that one!!!

Lily, I do trust him...but they were together a long time and I guess am just scared that he might start talking about 'the old days' with her sis and decide he misses her etc!!!

 

[ruthw]

id find it hard if my hubby was going with any woman ,but a friend is a friend not matter who they are related too ,im very jealous so i cant give advice ,but well done for not mentioning it to him because they will just make you look like a jealous freak ...which i am ,

 

[ruthw]

ive just read your your reply to another member omg i wouldnt have that i thought the tickets were already bought ,and so you couldnt get tickets for you ..why cant you go ...im so jel lol xxxxxxx

 

[Shopgirl1301]

I've been married ten years and with hubby for five years before that so obviously trust each other, but sorry I would go absolutely ballistic!!!!! But I would calm down and ask why in gods name weren't you invited!! Then depending on the answer either;
a) Cut off this privates
b) go with him
Simples!!!!

 

[Lilyscent]

Angel, I would slide it into a conversation somewhere as to why you were not asked to go, especially as this appears to have happened once before too and you said you managed to get on that one, so he obviously has not thought or learned from that one.
It does appear to be a very strange set up where he is still friends with all his ex`s family. I hope you manage to sort it through though hon.
All I was trying to say was I had the green eyed monster and it was unfounded in my case but only you can decide if you should confront him or not.

 

[phatmomma]

Just ask him? Why wind yourself up in knots wondering? If they have been mates for all this time then whats the problem? Women and men can be friends you know, i mean my ex husband was friends with my ex best mate, and when they left together i was the one missing two mates...

Seriously ask him, you'll have all sorts of scenarios going round in your head else...

I did note that you said your b/f ex has a boyfriend of her own now which makes life easier though... Does the sis in law have a b/f?

 

[starr]

its quite early days in a relationship and any one would feel concerned,its a funny one ,but id prob be hurt that hed booked something so advanced while your waiting for a massive op,and also really angry that i wasnt even included in it ,ive been happily married 29 years,and i say what i would say to my own daughter, just becareful,if there are signs things aint right ,trust your instincts love , might just be he didnt think it through,,,men are funny sometimes ,eh? ,good luck,and dont worry to much,being in love is hard sometimes eh lol

 

[AngelEyezHoney]

I've been married ten years and with hubby for five years before that so obviously trust each other, but sorry I would go absolutely ballistic!!!!! But I would calm down and ask why in gods name weren't you invited!! Then depending on the answer either;
a) Cut off this privates
b) go with him
Simples!!!!

:8855: Cut them off!!! lol

Just ask him? Why wind yourself up in knots wondering? If they have been mates for all this time then whats the problem? Women and men can be friends you know, i mean my ex husband was friends with my ex best mate, and when they left together i was the one missing two mates...

Seriously ask him, you'll have all sorts of scenarios going round in your head else...

I did note that you said your b/f ex has a boyfriend of her own now which makes life easier though... Does the sis in law have a b/f?

I know they can be friends, most of my mates are guys and I don't have scenarios going thru my head hun. Just angry that I told him I was going to go then he just went and brought the ticket.

I do trust him, really don't think he'd cheat just worried that being around her and talking bout the past will make him miss the past. I know it prob stupid but they were together a long time and the split wasn't anywhere near bad or for bad reasons so just a bit wary is all.

No, his sis in law doesnt have a bf hun x

its quite early days in a relationship and any one would feel concerned,its a funny one ,but id prob be hurt that hed booked something so advanced while your waiting for a massive op,and also really angry that i wasnt even included in it ,ive been happily married 29 years,and i say what i would say to my own daughter, just becareful,if there are signs things aint right ,trust your instincts love , might just be he didnt think it through,,,men are funny sometimes ,eh? ,good luck,and dont worry to much,being in love is hard sometimes eh lol

It doesnt bother me with regards to op etc cos the festival isn't until sept and my op is next mth (all going well!) but yh I am angry am not included!

Love hasn't come into the equation yet or trust me...there would be fireworks lmao


Thanks all though, glad am not the only one that thinks it...unusual!

 

[DietingDeb]

If my hubby did that even after us being together for 6 months I would be highly unimpressed mainly at the fact that I wasn't invited but saying that perhaps you need to go out and find your own friends (please don't take that the wrong way) the reason I say that is it is so nice to have friends to go out with and not just depending on one person - I would be so lost without my network of friends.

Have you asked why you where not invited ? Don't worry about him thinking about the past he could think about that anywhere at anytime

 

[AngelEyezHoney]

I do have friends hun!!! Just so busy working that I don't get to see them much!

TBH after speaking to him, I think it just went completely over his head! He not the most...aware person in the world as it is!

Oh well, **** happens lol

 

[DietingDeb]

What you need to do then is make less time for a man who doesn't put you first and make more time for your friends . . . if it was a lads weekend then fair enough but it's the ex's family and it is just weird lol

The one thing I have learnt over the last year is to put yourself first, it will only go over his head if he wants it to all men try that trick lol - other than that buy a taser that will teach him to treat you right lol x x

 

[AngelEyezHoney]

Lmao