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other peoples negativity

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serenitylove

New Member
how do you deal with other peoples negativity? iv had someone berrating me today because im nhs funded saying im taking money from the nhs that could be used for better things as my problems are self inflicted i found it upset me more than i thought it would, iv been quiet honest with people about eing banded but am starting to wonder if i should not have botherd
 
Hi...

I know exactly how you feel in many ways........... I had my bypass done on the nhs...... and i have been up front and honest with everyone.....

I had a so called friend who at the time I thought was special but since my op she has gone awful..... I have found out lately she is still saying things and being horrible about me, and is now saying I should never of had the op!!!!!!

This has upset me and put me in a very negative down ward spiral..... i am trying to look at it as her own jeolousy but i have to admit i am finding it very hard!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Keep positive though hun....
 
Serenity and Mandy... sorry you are getting loads of c*ap from people who should just keep their traps shut.

Don't let the b*****ds get you down :hug99:
 
Hi, it's no-ones business but yours. I bet they wouldn't say to a smoker that it's a liberty that they get oxygen on the NHS or to a drinker that their liver medication is a waste of money or to anyone with a STD that they shouldn't be treated. There are so many people who think it's their God given right to have an opinion about weight issues! Balls to them! You should be proud that you are doing something very positive about your weight and you will eventually save the NHS money in the long run as you will avert major, expensive and life threatening illnesses. Head up high! :hug99:
 
Everyone has an opinion about WLS. Olsblos said it perfectly!!!

Some of my friends haven't agreed with my decision for surgery but i told them to keep their opinions to themselves. Those that matter have been supportive. Why shouldn't the NHS fund the surgery lets face it it will save them money in the long run as our health improves eh!!!!

Keep positive you are having your op for you and it's right for you thats all that matters x
 
Just tell them all to go boil there heads !! Bloody opinonated busy bodies !!! **** em i say !! Harsh BUT TRUE !!! Have faith in yourself people .....were brave and have guts to do what were doing or have done !! Sod em...when your skimping it around the bedroom in little knick knocks ....u'll have the last laugh !!! Its life that people have opinions...but whether to let it affect u is your choice. Like the choice u have made to have surgery ...you have the choice to think BOG OFF !! he he !! Love to all xxxxxxxxxxx
 
Hi serenitylove

Had a bad experience myself with a few work colleagues. It made me feel awful and so posted a thread myself as I was so mad. Know it doesn't bother me at all.

I pay my tax have always worked and dont smoke. Nothing against smokers but sometimes more help for them with the goverment no smoking campaign,but you have to fight to get help for obesity.

I felt a honest and frank approach to my procedure would be best to stop tripping myself with lies, but not the case!

people think they have a right to be rude. Its ok having an opinion but some will over step the mark as I found out myself. One colleague even said the money could go to charity and didn't I feel guilty? But as one Miniminis friend pointed out when they go for a drink I should also do the same and ask if that money could not go to charity.

Hold you head up as I am now and **** the people that truly dont understand whats it's like to live in a very over weight body and the consequences on the NHS if left untreated.

It makes me mad.

Gail :mad:
 
Hi

Hi Mandy,
I think your so called friend is jealous that you will get slim and gorgeous, is she perhaps carrying a little extra weight herself, or perhaps like a friend of mine, who is no longer a friend!, likes to have a fat friend to make her feel good about herself, you go for it and keep your chin up,:)good luck for the future Tiz
 
I also have had a few mixed responses about been nhs banded ive also had a nhs tummy tuck too, the negitive responses i find is usually down to two things one is jellousy and two is just complete plain ignorance, it does not matter what others think, as long as you are happy thats all that matters, i had no problems asking for nhs plastics, and 3 days ago i was banded nhs 2nd time around, i have no problems with it, if i had of been a private patient i would not of been able to afford a band replacement.
good luck with your journey and dont worry !!
best wishes
liz xx
 
Sorry to hear you have had negativity from your friend. I agree, they are probably jealous. I am a private Bypasser, but if I could of had it on the NHS, then I would not of thought twice! Yes, money is tight in the NHS, but obesity is a DISEASE! You have been given treatment for a disease, and dont be put down about it. Just think of the money you will save the NHS in the long run having no illness related to obesity. I'm sure your friend would expect to be treated for a disease, and they would prob get it a lot easier than going through the process for WLS. Maybe the NHS should stop wasting money on art and statues! Yes I am proud I have paid for my surgery, but for the reason that I actually did it and that I have helped myself to get well, when my medical centre here could not help me, and I couldnt wait another 4 years to get back to the UK.

Anyway, be proud of what you have had done, and dont listen to these people who dont understand!

Kel x
 
Annie 100 said:
Hi, it's no-ones business but yours. I bet they wouldn't say to a smoker that it's a liberty that they get oxygen on the NHS or to a drinker that their liver medication is a waste of money or to anyone with a STD that they shouldn't be treated. There are so many people who think it's their God given right to have an opinion about weight issues! Balls to them! You should be proud that you are doing something very positive about your weight and you will eventually save the NHS money in the long run as you will avert major, expensive and life threatening illnesses. Head up high! :hug99:
Click to expand...


This just about sums it all up for me, agree with this post 100% take no notice of people with these attitudes......Linda x
 
Annie 100 said:
Hi, it's no-ones business but yours. I bet they wouldn't say to a smoker that it's a liberty that they get oxygen on the NHS or to a drinker that their liver medication is a waste of money or to anyone with a STD that they shouldn't be treated. There are so many people who think it's their God given right to have an opinion about weight issues! Balls to them! You should be proud that you are doing something very positive about your weight and you will eventually save the NHS money in the long run as you will avert major, expensive and life threatening illnesses. Head up high! :hug99:
Click to expand...

Hi girls
I totally agree, I used this argument when appealing to the PCT for funding for a FTT,although I have nothing against smokers or drinkers but when they can often cause there own illnesses caused by doing these things and it's proven hat they have caused their own illnesses then the NHS will obiviously give them the treatment they need for example, liver transplants confirmed through alcohoilsm, lung transplants proven to be caused by smoking( I know that people get these awful diseases by not doing either of things ), the list goes on, therefore I suggested to the PCT that all of these things were medical reasons and you wouldn't just leave them to suffer esp if they needed treatment so why leave me when my case is just the same as it is for a medical reason, ok not life threatening but it could be if I developed MRSA through the constant skin infections which i was told that i could do. I won my case.
Yours is a medical case as is all of the gastric op people on this forum and it is nothing to do with them and you shouldn't have to explain yourselves to anyone esp when your trying to help yourselves to help prevent possible illnesses in the future and to improve your quality of life and I admire all of you for that, so sod your so called friends they should be there for you and to support you not critise you or put you down.
Do not give in to their jealously, and live your life the way you want to with or without their support, lets face it, if they were true freinds then they should be truly happy for you. I am
Take care
Trina xxxx

ps I don't mean any disrespect to smokers or drinkers I'm just trying to explain my situation,:wavey::wavey:
 
sod what anyone else thinks they are only green that they cant get it, u will be saving the nhs loads in the future so stuff them and good luck xx
 
If it was me, I wouldn't try to defend myself (why should we?), instead, I'd just say very politely 'excuse me, but I don't recall asking for your opinion, so would you mind keeping it to yourself' and walk away.
 
shelbell said:
If it was me, I wouldn't try to defend myself (why should we?), instead, I'd just say very politely 'excuse me, but I don't recall asking for your opinion, so would you mind keeping it to yourself' and walk away.
Click to expand...

Such a lady Shelbel...id have to add a few F's before a few of those words first .....typical laaaandanar me ! ( Thats London to those who can't get the Accent:)) xx
 
lol I have a southern accent just to confuse people up here, so I understand ;)

I find being rude in a very polite way works miracles, it confuses the bejeesus out of stupid people :D My favourite one is when I'm dealing with shop people or sales people who just rant off speil is to say 'excuse me, but I am the customer, it would be appropriate for you to listen to what I have to say', always stops them dead!
 
Hi hun,

Sorry you have had a bad reaction from some ignorant individuals. The NHS does have limited resources and all assessment for any type of treatment are based upon medical need.

If you have been given NHS funding then an assessment has been carried out, you are entitled to your treatment and I for one don't feel that you should even feel like you have to justify it.

I think a lot of people think WLS is some sort of easy way out. I think it is far from that and have a lot of respect for the people in this part of the forum and for what they go through to try to achieve good health.

Good luck and although its hard just try not to let it get you down x
 
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