Sat Here crying ! whats wrong with me

[fatbutnot4eva]

well i have just shouted at all three kids and they have gone upstairs out of this mad womans way.
I have had my hair done ready, no phone call to cancel my op on monday and here i am in tears.

what an idiot ! I am soo ****, I am on my period so I will blame that a bit, Its my dads 60th next Sunday the 17th and I dont want to spoil it by not being able to eat or drink.

I feel such a failure, I have lost around 8 - 9lb so far on pre op diet and have stuck to it much better than i thought i ever could so why cant i lose weight for good. I know what you will all reply so I dont know whay i am typing it, its the maintaining that is impossible.

I dont know if it nerves or doubts or just plain fear, thinking of all the what ifs and its drving me crazy. Hubby is on a late and I am making kids tea (at the same time as typing)
I am just so scared that this will change me too much. I love my life so much my 3 young kids my hubby nights in watching dvd's with a wine and nice snacks what will we do instead ?

if only life were simple.
x
Helen

 

[Mark01/05/2009]

"I am just so scared that this will change me too much."

Yes it will change you! For the better! Your already great life will become amazing! You will live longer for your kids, what more motivation can you want?

You will still be able to have your wine and snacks, you will enjoy them in moderation and still lose weight as you will build them into your new balanced diet.....

Your nerves and fears are totally normal and they will pass. Once you get the op over with it will all become obvious that it was all worth it....

Keep looking forwaerd to the new you and you will be fine, i promise!!! xxxxxxxxx

 

[phatmomma]

I'm with Mark, i wondered how me and OH will cope socially as most of what we do involves eating. He says not to worry we'll do other things.....

Just one thing, you can sit and watch a dvd with the kids without nibbling and drinking alcohol.... you're just scared of change. Just remember what you learn from now on so will your children

My biggest fear is my kids join this site or similar cos they get overweight to my extent, seeing me go through surgery and make wiser choices will hopefully help them too xxx

 

[mandyl]

helen breath hun
prob nerves. i cry all the time mostly for nothing lol. xxx

 

[fatbutnot4eva]

Thanks you guys
Mark - you are an inspiration cant believe the weight you have lost and have to say you are looking fab

Julie you really shoudnt let your kids nibble and drink alchohol (oh you mean you lol)

Mandy - me too lately.

Just got a text from school to tell me they are not opening till tuesday so my mum has all three of them all day, she doesnt mind she says but a 7 , 5 and 2 year old all day !!

I am being silly sorry x

 

[phatmomma]

Thanks you guys
Mark - you are an inspiration cant believe the weight you have lost and have to say you are looking fab

Julie you really shoudnt let your kids nibble and drink alchohol (oh you mean you lol)

Mandy - me too lately.

Just got a text from school to tell me they are not opening till tuesday so my mum has all three of them all day, she doesnt mind she says but a 7 , 5 and 2 year old all day !!

I am being silly sorry x

Oh they don't eat and drink at the same time, good habits are good to learn lol......

Your mom will probably be glad to have the older two around to amuse the little one.... just remember crayons n paper and you can't go wrong lol xxx

 

[Cuppacocoa]

Hiya lovely, bless ya cottons I feel for you xx I know how hard I found it in the lead up to the op, you're emotions are all over the place and it's really hard. I too have three children and I also used to love nothing more than my evenings with hubby, eating, drinking, eating some more, watching a film, eating again......... I too was so worried I would miss it and feel in some way deprived. When you have young children, evenings like that 'are' your social life so I know how much they mean.

My life has changed since the bypass and so will yours, but SO much for the better, I promise you. All the things I loved about food before the op changed overnight, I felt differently instantly. But never in a negative way, always positive. The best thing is I suddenly had total control over what I ate and that is something I have never had before. It's a fantastic feeling.

I still enjoy my evenings with hubby, usually on a Saturday once the kids are in bed, watching the box and eating nice things, but now it's things that I know are doing me good; healthy things that are helping me to lose this horrid weight. And now THAT'S what makes me happy. Just as happy as I was before. Plus a bit more. And hubby's happy because I'm happy. Does that make sense?!!

I never imagined the way this bypass would make me feel; I was always a happy person before, but now...? I'm as happy as a slightly slimmer pig in sh1t.

Please try not to worry hun, you will not regret a thing, I promise you.

Cuppa xx

 

[fatbutnot4eva]

thanks cuppa god you lot are fooking good x

 

[phatgirl]

Hun, it is perfectly normal to feel fear of change, you would be silly not to! You are talking to many people here that have been exactly where you are right now but now they have brilliant success stories to share. You will be one of us so soon!

I always smile a little when I read people's fear about being social with food. HA! I think, that was something I worried about but it really isn't a problem. Hubby and I snuggle, drink wine, have snacks just like we always have. The difference is that I make snacks that are not only tasty but good for me as well. And it is much less likely that we will find the bottom of a bottle now that I have had my fill after 2 glasses! Your 'social' times will be just the same as always only you will be treating your body better, and getting much more out of your life. You will adapt your eating and before you know it you will be eating and enjoying yourself without a second thought towards your old ways. I cannot tell you, as you have to experience it for yourself, how wonderful having a meal out is with wls peeps! When we have meets we always eat and chat and it is so normal, but when you look around at the end of the meal and see so much food left it always makes me laugh! But as soon as you are comfortable with eating, nobody really takes notice of what you eat unless you bring it up.

Give those kids a hug and just know that you are giving them a beautiful gift as well as one for yourself!

Nic

 

[Silversurfer]

Some really wise words from the gang helen !

Everyone gets nervous, its all part of it and you'll be fine like the rest of us, and your going to be in the hands of the God Ammori, no one here that has had him has failed to be successful with there lose, PG, Carol, myself and many others, your in safe hands.

 

[fatbutnot4eva]

Thanks again Nic & SS xxx

 

[scott.fiskel]

Hiya I had my band fitted in September 09, I was thinking a few days before hand what on earth am I doing to myself, then sat down spoke with family and was happy in the end, 4 months down the line I'm really happy ive been banded I've lost 9 stone and feel as if I have been re-born, I have my social life back I have fun and enjoying every moment. Good Luck Chick x

 

[jaxx]

I was like this on Monday (before my op was cancelled) and I'll probably be like it in 8 or 9 days time when it's the run up to my next op date.

I was wondering if I was doing the right thing, not just for myself but for my family as well. Would I be the same person and the answer is no. I'd be happier and better. I think it will be the same for you. You'll be more active with your kids, be able to spend more time with them and with your hubby too. Life will change but for the better I'm sure of it.

Jaxx xx

 

[nicky72]

the words why cant i do this myself were exactly the same words i used when i was laying on the operating table waiting to be put to sleep i had a right rant at myself why was i putting myself and family threw this all because i coudnt stop eating fuc.ing food how lame i have 2 girls and i was so scared but then this nurse told me to stop being so hard on myself and wouldnt life be boring if we were all perfect dieters please stop crying love we have all felt what you are feeling i hope these words have made you feel better we are all here for you

 

[Ulidia]

I was sick today because I was silly! I often do silly things and suffer for it, but this is a learning curve and when you get onto that curve things will change in your life for the better.

You will never go back again, your fitness level wil increase, your interest in life will pick up again and, in three months time all the bad times will begin to fade away.

The first time someone tells you that you look great will make it all worth while. Stick in there my friend, live is good after surgery!

U

 

[tink75]

We def all had the same worries but honestly it is all worth it. I have just got in after going for a meal with friends - I just chose a healthy meal and felt completely normal. It is actually funny when they take your plate away and you have only eaten a little of the meal - I always have a secret smile at their faces. I also have movie nights with my family and these continue but with healthy treats for myself. Before surgery I would nibble on sweet things CONSTANTLY but now I am happy with a yoghurt or a fruit salad. Weight loss makes you feel amazing and motivated and my confidence is starting to soar. I set myself mini goals and my next one is to fit into my wedding ring - I find this really helps me to stay motivated and committed. Good luck with your surgery and I can't wait til I see you love your weight loss just as much as I do in a couple of months time xxx