Hi Shannon
One of my 'biggies' is thinking like a big person. I hide behind my weight, historically it's been my excuse for everything bad in my life. I know that this is no magic wand but it's a tool to help me regain control of my weight. When I lose weight, I'll need to embrace it, not sabotage myself as I've done in the past.
Don't allow yourself to pin your self worth on your size. I'm not sure what attention you crave, but in looking at yourself from inside out should help you learn to love yourself. Until you do that, you will find it difficult to let down barriers.
Like the others have said, do your research, analyse your eating patterns and speak to your GP.
Good luck.