Secret surgery

[Ready For Change]

Morning all!
I just wanted to say that my mam told all the family that she was having surgery on the 15th and that she was going to the lakes the week before to relax beforehand. However she lied, I received a call from her this morning telling me she'd had her op on Tuesday morning and is coming home today. I was devastated! She had wls 20 years ago and it was a vertical band something or other and mr small told her she was very high risk and the chances of her pulling through or not were 50/50! For her to do it in secret was the biggest betrayal, I urge anyone planning to do it in secret not too! She has pulled through it amazingly and mr small told her he'd never in his career worked so hard, she was in theatre for 9 hours!!! I'm so glad all is well but had she not pulled through I would never have forgiven her or my dad. But on the brighter side, we're in it together and will be ready to hit Florida next year with the same energy levels as the characters in fancy dress lol. I love her dearly but by god did she make me angry for an hour! Hope everyone is well? Please please don't have surgery in secret.
Katie
Xxxxxx

 

[suzz69uk]

wowsers 9hrs! glad the op went well though. I am surprised she kept it secret from you though. x

 

[PhilT]

Not wanting to be flippant but parents can misbehave too and looks like mam did but she is on track now hope all is well

 

[Ready For Change]

She says she didn't want us all worried whilst she was on the table which I kinda understand. She was asking after you on the phone, I told her you were much better and had this amazing place for support. How are you doing with the diet? X

 

[Alimac79]

mams are the most precious of people (lost mine 4 year ago) your mam was obviously trying to spare you the worry, so glad she is on the mend

 

[shannon_hilder]

it sounds to me that you are more upset and hurt than angry that she kept it a secret, sit down when she gets home today and have a little chat with her and make her realize how hurt you are that she didnt tell you, clear there air with her, remember the only person you hurt when you hold hurt feelings is yourself..at least if you can clear the air then it gives those hurt feelings time to heal, good advice about keeping it a secret, i think people need to share such information like that with the ones they hold nearest and dearest... sending my love xxxx

 

[Ready For Change]

Phil you are soooo right, if the roles were reversed though I'd be grounded for at least a week lol. She had a drain coming from her stomach which was a little nauseating but necessary. You all set? Bag packed? Maxed out with milk? Nervous? Excited? I kept retching with nerves and excitement in the week leading to surgery, strange but true lol. X

 

[Ready For Change]

mams are the most precious of people (lost mine 4 year ago) your mam was obviously trying to spare you the worry, so glad she is on the mend

Ali that's what frightened me, what if!!! Had it gone the other way without me wishing her luck and love, then what! She's a sod but at least she did what felt right for her. I guess all of us saying a final farewell would have been horrendous and not exactly put her in the right frame of mind to be wheeled to theatre. Thank you for your kind words x

 

[Ready For Change]

it sounds to me that you are more upset and hurt than angry that she kept it a secret, sit down when she gets home today and have a little chat with her and make her realize how hurt you are that she didnt tell you, clear there air with her, remember the only person you hurt when you hold hurt feelings is yourself..at least if you can clear the air then it gives those hurt feelings time to heal, good advice about keeping it a secret, i think people need to share such information like that with the ones they hold nearest and dearest... sending my love xxxx

Shannon, I will most definitely be doing that. I may put it in writing, that way I won't loose my rag and she can read it in her own time. Let's hope she has a similar recovery as me! X

 

[suzz69uk]

She says she didn't want us all worried whilst she was on the table which I kinda understand. She was asking after you on the phone, I told her you were much better and had this amazing place for support. How are you doing with the diet? X

oh I am so much better, went to town yesterday and had a great time. managing purees no problem now, just puzzling over what foods to eat as getting boring having the same things.

Give your mum a hug from me. x

 

[Ready For Change]

Went to town clubbing or shopping? If you were clubbing I take my hat off and bow down to you girl lol. I've had the same dilema, I'm really mixing things up now though. Mash with every condiment in the house, mashed veg roasted with different seasonings, I had a thin cracker with pate the other day as my teeth are feeling redundant and i managed it but won't be doing it again as I felt like I was undoing all the hard work. I've not been sick once which I'm really proud about as a lot of people report vomiting. I tell you what I have noticed, people around me (friends) eating more takeaways and you know what, the thought or what's in them makes me feel like I'll never touch one again! Yippee, my brain has turned a corner..! Oh and my hubby mark has lost 7lb since my surgery too, must be because I'm not sending him to the shop every night lol. Xxxx

 

[PhilT]

All of those feelings plus hun lol I have packed and repacked for the last month

 

[suzz69uk]

shopping lol, no way would I go clubbing. I think i have been sick twice, oh and dumped on 1%milk! never again will I have that milk. x

 

[Miss Tickle]

All of those feelings plus hun lol I have packed and repacked for the last month

Just make sure you've got your ear plugs and lip balm in your bag. I found them both invaluable
xx

 

[kimgkg]

Shannon, I will most definitely be doing that. I may put it in writing, that way I won't loose my rag and she can read it in her own time. Let's hope she has a similar recovery as me! X

I have to say, I'm one for putting it in writing, too. Sometimes saying it face to face can get heated with one trying to put their point over at the same time as the other. Good luck ... say what you want to say ... and remember she may have made a mistake as far as you are concerned, but that wasn't intentional ... she undoubtedly loves you very much and thought she was doing it for the right reasons.

xxx

 

[Ready For Change]

shopping lol, no way would I go clubbing. I think i have been sick twice, oh and dumped on 1%milk! never again will I have that milk. x

Phew, the thought of clubbing makes me cringe at the minute lol. 1% milk? I'll be telling my mam to steer clear of it as she usually drinks that. Can you feel the restriction? One mini yoghurt is enough for me now, I just need more fluids. X

 

[Ready For Change]

I have to say, I'm one for putting it in writing, too. Sometimes saying it face to face can get heated with one trying to put their point over at the same time as the other. Good luck ... say what you want to say ... and remember she may have made a mistake as far as you are concerned, but that wasn't intentional ... she undoubtedly loves you very much and thought she was doing it for the right reasons.

xxx

Thanks for that chick, I'll see how we go when I see her tomorrow. I'm 3 weeks post op tomorrow and know how emotional the first week can be so I think not bringing it up for a while will be the best idea. After all, she's the most strong minded person I know so whatever I think, I know she's done it for her own valid reasons xxx

 

[Ready For Change]

Just make sure you've got your ear plugs and lip balm in your bag. I found them both invaluable
xx

I didn't take earplugs and managed brilliantly, Vaseline for my lips was a god send. I closed the curtains around my bed on my last night and that made a massive difference, it may have seemed anti social but gosh I slept like a log lol and the girls were totally fine with it x

 

[suzz69uk]

I didn't take earplugs and managed brilliantly, Vaseline for my lips was a god send. I closed the curtains around my bed on my last night and that made a massive difference, it may have seemed anti social but gosh I slept like a log lol and the girls were totally fine with it x

Donna tried that on the last night and got told off from an evil nurse! Said as she was post op the nurse had to be able to see her in bed.... go figure

 

[suzz69uk]

Phew, the thought of clubbing makes me cringe at the minute lol. 1% milk? I'll be telling my mam to steer clear of it as she usually drinks that. Can you feel the restriction? One mini yoghurt is enough for me now, I just need more fluids. X

1%milk is the purple top milk but upon dumping i read the ingredients and it is full of sugar which i did not expect.

I don't think I am feeling a restriction as such but I know when I am full, I think once on solids I will feel it.

I can manage an activia yoghurt but not a muller light due to the size.