Should have had op today. Feeling very down.

[stripeytop]

My band op was due today. I cancelled it last week. I just feel so fed up.

I just had so many doubts about it that I felt I ought to think about it more. I saw a post on here about 'damage over Christmas' and eating cheese & crackers and drinking wine. These things are exactly my downfall and I panicked that I would go through with the op and then cheat with slider foods. I just felt that I had cheated & failed at every other diet and I would do it again.
I also felt very guilty for spending a huge amount of money on myself.

Also I do drink alcohol almost every day. Obviously I couldn't drink on the pre op diet and I found this really hard. So this made me question whether I could do it after the op.

I want to thanks everyone on here for all their help over the past few months. I will keep checking in and seeing how well everyone is doing. (looking forward to following fatbutnot4ever as she had her op today- wishing her a swift recovery)

 

[rybens]

Maybe this is not the end and you will be in a better place another time to have your operation x stay part of the wls clan , we all have some input for others even if we have not had wlsurgery x chin up x

 

[phatmomma]

I'm sorry you felt like you had to cancel your operation. Maybe think of it as a postponement instead. Give it one last push on the diet front (as we all have). If it doesn't work then you haven't failed at all....

You shouldn't feel guilty about the expense, your health and happiness doesn't have a price limit.

As you worry about cheating have you thought about having a gastric bypass instead?

Hope you find some resolution xxx

 

[j.u.s.t.l.i.z.]

was it a band op you cancelled ? maybe a bypass would suit your eating habbits and lifestyle so much better than banding, never say never think long and hard as wls can change your life for the better, write 2 lists 1 with the benefits you think wls will bring to your life and 1 list with the negitives that you think you wont like to change, evaluate the lists and think about what will be best for you long term.

Liz x

 

[BIG KIM]

No matter what size you are, you should not have WL Surgery if you are not 100% sure its what you want.
I have never been a huge drinker or eater, but whatever I do eat just sticks to me and doesn't burn off.
I will miss the odd beer, and the odd Chinese, but my health and length of life are far more important.

 

[stripeytop]

Thanks for all your replies. You are all so positive.
I won't give up, just need to sort my head out.

 

[jaxx]

The reason I went for the Bypass rather than the band is because I knew I would cheat with it.

The decision to have surgery is totally your own and if you're not 100% certain then don't go ahead with it. Try talking it over with your wls team, they might be able to refer you to a counsellor.

 

[stripeytop]

I haven't considered a bypass because:
1.) The chances of things going wrong. (sure my surgeon said 1 in 50 for the bypass and 1 in 1000 for the band.)
2.) The cost. I'm sure you will all say that your health is everything but not if you haven't got the money. I was already borrowing money for the band (Over £7k) and felt guilty about doing that. With our mortgage & uncertainty in job security I just couldn't borrow enough money for a bypass.
3.) I'm a wimp. I've only ever been in hospital once (burst appendix) and it took me ages to recover.

I'm still battling with my feelings and wish I had gone through with it. But as some of you have said I'm not 100%.

 

[emergingbutterfly]

My band op was due today. I cancelled it last week. I just feel so fed up.

I just had so many doubts about it that I felt I ought to think about it more. I saw a post on here about 'damage over Christmas' and eating cheese & crackers and drinking wine. These things are exactly my downfall and I panicked that I would go through with the op and then cheat with slider foods. I just felt that I had cheated & failed at every other diet and I would do it again.
I also felt very guilty for spending a huge amount of money on myself.

Also I do drink alcohol almost every day. Obviously I couldn't drink on the pre op diet and I found this really hard. So this made me question whether I could do it after the op.

I want to thanks everyone on here for all their help over the past few months. I will keep checking in and seeing how well everyone is doing. (looking forward to following fatbutnot4ever as she had her op today- wishing her a swift recovery)

It is a very big decision to have any sort of WLS and if you are not 100% sure then you have done the right then to cancel it/postphone it. There are a lot of things to consider and your life will change, especially how you eat and socialise so if you think you were not ready then you were right to cancel it. It doesnt mean you cant change your mind at a later date. Go easy on yourself and dont give yourself a hard time over it.

 

[Mazza]

Hi

I think you have done the right thing if you were not 100% sure.

Its a very big decision, either procedure can 'fail' the band or bypass (or sleeve) are a tool for us to work with and they both require determination and willpower.

Good luck with whatever you decide to do x

 

[stripeytop]

Thanks for the kind gestures everyone. Have had a bad cough/cold all week and to be fair I don't think they would have done the op anyway.
Maybe when I have got rid of this I will have a clearer head.

 

[fatbutnot4eva]

Hi Stripey xxxx
Not sure quite what to say, doubts well I had a million and while i was sat with my oversized gown stockings and paper knickers i thought what the flip an i doing, shoud i just get up and sneak past reception and go home. Is being fat that wrong.
I shoudl have gone down at 11.30 then they told me that they woudl do me at 8.30 then they decided to do teh 2 bypass ops first so I finally went down at 3.30pm, so I spent 9 hours on my own thinking thoughts.
Then the theatre nurse came and got me and we walked 5 mins to the room outside theatre and before i knew it i was on the bed with a mask on and having an injection, not even time for chit chat let alone last minute jump offs (the bed that is not sex)
I woke at around 5-6pm not sure exactly might have been earlier I couldnt belive it was over, knew something had been done as in all honesty I felt quite crap. Got to the ward and was sleepy on and off opened my eyes at one point and hubby was sat there all i could say was sorry and fell back asleep lol.
But I have to say its done now, I still dont feel tip top but my worst fears are over and the future is brighter teh future is...thinner.
I love cider and wine and woudl drink it every day if i coudl afford to, I didnt have any since 28th december and in all honesty i have not missed it, I was sat waiting for my op and dont ask me how i coudl smell fresh bread and i though awwww french stick with butter yummy. BUT thats it I will have what I am allowed and in 6-8 weeks i will try all teh things that i love and some will agree and some wont and teh ones that wont I will substitute for something equally as nice the thing is a bit or two will do not teh whole packet or box. I wont miss out I will choose what i can have and I will benefit in the end as i will get my "cake" and eat it (not literally as i dont like cake lol) but i hope you see what i mean, i will get that bite of something but still get to wear a smaller dress and still feel like i have not missed out.
You have to be certain in your own mind, I still cant belive it is done, I have waited 20 months and I was thinking omg I have been waiting for this but dont know if i want it.
I cant turn time back I have my band now and I will work 100% with it.
Dont make a decision based on someone else you have to be happy with your choice.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Helen
Oh and thank you for thinking of me x

 

[fatbutnot4eva]

Oh my hubby brought me a mag in the hospital take a break it had an 8 page special on wls, and one was where a woman had a bypass and cheater it so much she stretched it and put all her weigt back on, she then had the op again.
we all have to give 100% and be comitted xxx

 

[swizzlestick]

Hi Stripey Top

It looks like you done the right thing for now by cancelling the op. But that doesnt mean that a few months or years down the line you cant reconsider.

Your consultant was wrong with the morbidity figures for bypass surgery btw. Its roughly 1 in 200 but even those figures are outdated now I think as the more ops that are done and the more surgeons who specialise get better the morbidity rates improve. Its also important to understand that usually the ones that go wrong are on very very large people or those with other underlying conditions.

You are also right to worry about your drinking habits( I'm not saying you have any drinking problems btw lol)as there is some research regarding addiction transference after surgery.

I hope that you feel more positive soon, good luck with everything Xx

 

[stripeytop]

Thanks for the replies.
As i said I will will stay in touch.
(btw not sure what I will have to pay yet. Have already had a bill for the consultancy with the surgeon. Will wait & see if hospital send me a seperate one.)

 

[Rache]

Good luck with whatever decision you make in future.... any doubts are worth considering and sounds like you have made a sensible decision for how you feel now. Here's hoping for a thinner future however we come by it xxx