Unexpected reactions to your weight loss.

[StephieAck]

Hi all
Has anyone experienced any unexpected reactions to their weight loss?
I have and I have only lost 2st 5lbs.
People that used to be very friendly to me pre op are now being either wierd with me or plain old ignoring me post op.
I dont know if they were friendly before because they liked having me there as the 'fat friend' sort of thing, maybe they viewed themselves in relation to me, you know 'Im fine as long as Im not as fat as Steph' and now that I am dropping the weight and looking well for it, maybe their view of themselves is being challenged, I dont know but I really didnt expect them to change so much towards me.
There are two women in work and they used to chat to me and be friendly etc and now they barely even glance in my direction and they sure as hell dont talk to me. The other day another lady in work came over to me to chat because in her words "I just HAD to tell you how well I think youre doing" and one of the women that has started ignoring me was with her and looked INCREDIBLY uncomfy and I said "well wait until summer til Im slim" and the one that is ignoring me said "yeah and we'll be going '*****' behind your back"...I just laughed at the time but you know what, she really is being funny with me. Its her issue obviously, if she isnt happy as she is then she shouldnt be so bothered by my changes, she should make her own.
The other one realllllllly shocks me because she was always so lovely and she was somebody that I thought would always be friendly, so for her to change so badly towards me is really odd.
The only thing to change about me is my weight, I am no more outgoing in work, my personality hasnt changed and my confidence isnt changed as yet, the only changes that they can see are physical, so it MUST be this causing the change in their behaviour.
Has anyone else experienced this or anything else that they didnt expect?
Steph xx

 

[ladybird_gal]

Can't say I have. How very sad that they are behaving in that way. Try not to let it get to you - you will know how well you feel and look so ...

 

[StephieAck]

Ladybird...to be honest it is more a case of sod em, its their loss, it is just a suprise to see that behaviour.
Steph xx

 

[claudia24]

like u sed its there loss, how dare they be judgemental toward you, they shud be happy and supportin u xx

 

[shelbell]

The only odd one i have had is from a school mum who works at the hospital where I now have my aftercare (but had my op elsewhere). She made a comment when I was booking in at reception that i'm 'almost' slimmer than her now! thing is I've been slimmer than her for a fair while now lol. She said it in a really resentful way but thats her problem, not mine! Her son is a horrid child any way lol.

 

[StephieAck]

I expected this behaviour when I had lost 5-6st but after 2st?!!! There are some petty people around arent there.
I must say that most people are very supportive but those asses that arent need to get a life. Sod em Shel.
Steph xx

 

[Mazza]

Yep Ive had the ignoring bit too. The most suprising reaction though is when someone dicusses how much weight they have lost recently and when I say I have lost 50lbs since the end of April they look at me as if to say - yeah right! Almost as if they dont want to acknowledge it.

Oh well I know I have and I feel good!

 

[Blackdolphin17]

You know what? It is still early days for you and different people will react to you in different ways. For me its surprising how people who really didnt speak to me before are now talking to me and complimenting me on my weightloss - its as if I was invisible before in some people's eyes.

Funnily its a few of my close friends - especially those who put on weight over the years who are a bit funny with me. Its as if they could always count on me to be their 'fat friend' & I would always be bigger than them but that is changing now. I find they either dont contact me as much as before or they have started very strict diets & exercise programmes. Which I guess must be a good thing right?

The way I see it .... I've got enough on my plate trying to get my own head around the new me without also worrying about what other people think. I just think over time my true friends will love me no matter what!!!

 

[StephieAck]

Its a funny old thing isnt it.
Thanks for the replies guys xxx
Steph xx

 

[dreamofbeingslim]

Its jealousy Steph.

 

[phatmomma]

Stuff em, so long as your happy and continue to do your job properly... Their loss x

 

[BypassBee]

One of my best friends, who is very over weight, not as much as i was, but still... was so against me having the op.
And anytime i have seen her post op, she hasnt even mentioned that i have lost weight, or that i look better... my other best friend, who is a very skinny minny, is very supportive, and says i look great!


i know its probably jealousy, it's her i feel bad for though, cos i know she is unhappy with her weight but she isn't ready to address it yet though.

.x.

 

[hopelesscase]

people do ignor me but only bacause they dont recognise me. lol
like you say sad people its their loss.

 

[Pookiedoodle]

There are some odd people about aren't there.
Don't let them get to you mate, jealousy is a horrible thing!!!
xx

 

[StephieAck]

Thanks for the replies guys xx
My attitude now is stuff em, I would be thrilled for them if they were in my shoes but if they cant be the same for me then stuff em!!!
Bigger and better things out there than a few petty people.

Steph xx