what do i tell the boss

[tutusueshropshire]

hi can u help i gota tell work im having a op, to emabressed to say its a bypass they will not understand plus only been in the job 2 weeks and if i told them i was having bypass at the interview i no i wouldnt have had the job,:cry:....
so can u give me a idea what to say... its on the 7th may and going to say ive had a cancelation appointment i hate lying its not me but im to scared to tell the truth, im sure u will all understand
many thanks xx

 

[JOWOOD4]

I pretended mine was a hiatus hernia as I had a band and the port was in about the right place. It also meant no-one asked about slimfast and mushies and not eating solid food for a while.
I think most GPs put stomach surgery if you ask them so its then up to you what you say. Its not a cosmetic op so nothing can be said about you being away from work but I know what you mean about the embarrassment factor.
Good luck with whatever you decide
JO XX

 

[Big an Bouncy]

Or say its gall bladder that flares up and you got a cancellation.It may come out anyway and then your not lying!

 

[Kevin1708]

Interesting . . . I had decided to fabricate a story but then decided that honesty must be the best policy and believe me you feel so much better for being open and above board. Remember, if you boss finds out you have been ‘economical with the truth’ he may sack you ! There are also certain dangers of claiming one type of surgery when you have had another ~ please also remember there will be those who know the truth and you will be affectively asking that they lie for you. If your friends and work colleagues cannot accept the truth then that is their problem and shows a tremendous lack of respect (and lack of intelligence) for what you are doing . . . some will be jealous you are moving forward – normally overweight ‘friends’ don’t want you to succeed as you may no longer be the largest in the group (they are!). . . xx

 

[The Chopster]

I am booking my time off as holiday as I don't want to risk getting into trouble afterwards

 

[Peterborough Guy]

Im with Kevin on this one, the truth must be the right thing to say, as if you tell a fib on this and the work find out about it, it could affect your working relationship with them in the future, or worst case even end up sacking you for Gross Misconduct.

I am lucky that my boss understands, and although it will affect the business while im off, he can see the benefit on my return.

Good luck with this and let us know how it goes.

 

[cindy63]

Ive had the same problem. Got my date for the 17th may this year last week didnt know what to say so said I was having stomach surgery thought that would be enough , but my boss wanted copies of my surgery letters from the hospital and in depth details of surgery, the reason for it and a complete post surgery plan. saying he needed this so they can help me. They say if they dont know they cant help. So as of yesterday I have given the copies of the letters and I am going to speak to my gp to check if they really need to be that invasive with regards to my treatment. I did have to tell them it was a bypass as I was under pressure at the time. but he even asked me if the letters stated that it was for medical reasons OMG I said Im not a bloody model its on the NHS and they dont give this surgery unless its for medical reasons. So you can see it can be minefield. But I think like kevin you must be truthful but check with your gp and I think you may only have to give the minimal info: operation date and legnth of time from work. Hope it goes ok keep us posted Good luck x

 

[Sambucca]

I agree with others, certainly dont lie and say its something it isnt, but just to say its stomach surgery for ongoing issues is fine.

I was in a similar situation in that I had recently started a new job when I got my date and with any job, they can dismiss you within the first year for no reason at all so I had the same worries as you, but thankfully my employers were supportive. Speak to ACAS re your employment rights if you are worried.

Cindy, your employer was out of line to ask for such detail. Your health is personal and telling them it was stomach surgery should have been more than enough.

 

[msunique]

I told work I was having a key hole op and it was for an investigation and didnt elaborate any further and they didnt ask.

On my sick note my gp put post op.

 

[beccles]

I told work I was having a key hole op and it was for an investigation and didnt elaborate any further and they didnt ask.

On my sick note my gp put post op.

I did the same as msunique and not had any problems and my consultant put on the certificate post op - same as above actually!

 

[bikerlady]

hi can u help i gota tell work im having a op, to emabressed to say its a bypass they will not understand plus only been in the job 2 weeks and if i told them i was having bypass at the interview i no i wouldnt have had the job,:cry:....
so can u give me a idea what to say... its on the 7th may and going to say ive had a cancelation appointment i hate lying its not me but im to scared to tell the truth, im sure u will all understand
many thanks xx

Hi Sue, I know this is a hard one! I had my op on the 7th April, I only had one weeks notice as I got a cancellation. I took leave as I had a lot of sick leave last year when I had a Hysterectomy. So when I asked for the leave I told my boss I needed an op, he just said he hoped everything was ok, I told him it was nothing serious, he didnt ask for any details. I think anything female scares him to death, bless him. Had he asked I was going to tell him it was minor abdominal surgery, I wouldnt have been lying, i too would be embarrassed to say what I had really had done. I don't think we actually have to give all the nitty gritty details, I suppose it depends on your employer. Anyway, I am sure you can tell them the truth without giving them all the details and without lying to them. I hope it goes well for you and the op goes smoothly for you hun, good luck xx

 

[tutusueshropshire]

thanks for the advice, i phoned them this morning, and told them im having a hernia repair and some investigations, they were absolutley fine, didnt ask any questions, and said she would put me ofF Work for 2 weeks and take it from there..... PHEW!! XX

 

[bikerlady]

Thats a relief for you xx

 

[madstaffyblonde1]

I agree with the other's the truth is the best way to go, I told my boss all about the appointments and the op as I went along the NHS motorway to the bypass, they were great and had no problems with me having the time off. I'm so glad i did as explaining why I had gone from a size 24 to a size 8 in a year may have been hard to disguise lol but since then i had 2 weeks off for a minor plastics op and on the day of my return I had my date come through for my tummy tuck which again they knew all about, I have been off work now for 4 weeks and they ring me every week to make sure I'm getting better etc, they also no I am waiting for other plastics op's and again are fine with me having the time off just as long as I give them as much notice as possible so they can arrange cover they have even put off the office refurb until I get back as I am the one that has designed it so they said I have to be there to make sure it goes as I want it lmao you would never of though project management of the office is in the job description of a accounts manager lmao

 

[Kevin1708]

I personally believe that it is vital that your employer know the type of surgery you are about to undergo and the likely prognosis. Remember with the bypass you may well need up to 6 weeks off work !

If, God forbid, you have an accident at work or collapse while at work this leaves your employer in a rather precarious position especially if he/she is affectively telling an paramedic that you have a hiatus hernia! It is a minefield and the truth will undoubtedly come out. Remember you might well be entitled to contractual sick pay when unfit for work - whatever the reason. An employed will not be amused if you are claiming sick paid and fibbing or being economical with the truth (as well as it being potentially fraudulent). No employer has the right to ask for copy confidential documents and a letter from you consultant or GP will suffice.

 

[Undecided]

Cindy your bosses sound awful ! Have never known a company be so invasive. Cant see the harm in putting just "stomach surgery". That's all it is after all. And in reality what COULD they help you with. Any other stomach surgery would have the same sort of consequesnces - change in eating habits for a while etc.

Sounds to me like they were just being plain nosey. I lost my job a year ago when the company I worked for went into administration and have struggled to find work since then. I guess I'm *lucky* that I'm not currently working. Although I do have an interview scheduled for 2 days before the op ! lol

Where possible though I would take holidays. Saves having to tell them anything at all. I dont think it's something work need to know.