Why do I still see a size 30 woman in the mirror?

[yorkiegal]

I'm a size 18 now. I've lost nearly 7 stone since May. People are always saying how well I've done and how different I look. I can kind of see it when I look at myself. I can see cheekbones and shoulder bones etc. If I look at myself side on I can definitely tell. But face on in the mirror and looking at myself as a whole, I just see the fat lady. And when I'm in the bath I don't see any difference in my stomach or thighs or upper arms from when I was pre-op.
I see the weight on my scales and it doesn't make sense to me because I think it should say so much more.

I think it's taking my head a while to catch up with what's happened. I bought a gorgeous dress and coat, both size 18 and wore them in town the other day. But all the time I felt people were staring at me and laughing at the morbidly obese woman for daring to wear a knee length fashionable colourful dress, rather than the big fleeces I used to hide in.

I had a photo taken when I was on hols in october with a friend so I could compare it to when I was on hols with them a couple of years ago. I was so disappointed when I compared them because I can barely see a difference, even though common sense tells me there must be after so much weight loss. Does anyone else feel this way?

edit: lets see if i can add the pics. the first is the day before surgery, the second is on holiday at my heaviest with my good friend and the third is on holiday this october with the same friend.

maybe it's just a bad picture. the only other recentish one i have is the one with marlon from emmerdale lol:

 

[Big an Bouncy]

Weired isnt it,I get on the scales and 13st looks wrong!

 

[FuturePerfect]

You can definitely tell a difference with your face; the before pictures don't show enough of your body to compare, but there must be a big change there too. Did you keep a fat item of clothing? If you put that back on can you see the difference?

With 7 stone loss there will be changes all over. You may not notice yourself, but other people who don't see you so often will see big changes. Start taking more regular photos from now on, and you will soon notice the difference.

 

[Miss Tickle]

YG. Although you very pretty in picture 3 it is at a strange angle that makes it harder to see your weight loss. Put you and Marlon and the photo of you the day before your op side by side and there are two different women. In the final picture I see a slim healthy woman who is many years younger than the lady in piccy 1. I hope that in time you will see her too. It takes a long time for our self image to catch up with the reality for lots of us. I have no concept of my size any more !
Cheer up hon-you've done brilliantly xx

 

[minxie]

Gosh what a difference in the recent picture - you look 10 years younger! And you have shapely shoulders, and a neck lol!

I know what you mean though, I think that the weight drops off so quickly it is hard to get your head around. But just think, a few months ago you couldn't have worn that fashionable dress and coat because they probably didn't have it in your size! Have you taken measurements before and since your op?

And all those people looking at you? They were probably thinking look at that confident smiling woman, she looks a bit familiar but can't quite place you!

Well done!!!

 

[Sharonimo]

Your new pics look fab .... but all I wanna know is how did you get to meet the lovely Marlon from Emmerale? !!

Was it a day trip to the Emmerdale set?

 

[shelbell]

Not sure if it helps but you're not alone. I'm still massive too!

Sent from my iPhone using Forum Runner

 

[hopelesscase]

Its funny how different people see themselves. I no longer see or even relate to the fat me but i do have fat days!

I often pick an item of clothing up in a shop in a size 8 and think that wont fit me so take the 10 and end up having to change it for the 8.

Its taken a couple of years to get here and i still do a double take in the shop windows sometimes.

your face is looking so much slimmer and you are looking younger. keep up the good work and believe in you. x

 

[penelope1008]

Yorkiegal you look great & to the rest of us the change is obvious. But I think we all suffer the same problem of not actually seeing the changes in ourselves. It took someone saying my face was thinner for me to actually look in the mirror & see what they saw.
Now at 13st from my 19st in sizes 12/14 instead of 20/22, I still do a double take when I see my reflection in windows ( I still don't own a full length mirror at home). Whose that skinny woman wearing my clothes. Compliments are great but still make me squirm a bit, after so many years of putting ourselves down it's hard to accept the positive changes in ourselves.
Be proud of yourself & your achievements believe in yourself & what you've been told take another look at yourself & let yourself see you as they do a slim wonderful young lady, as for those people in the street they were staring at the new you in fashionable clothes not the you you see but the new slimmer you. Believe, accept & see the changes in the physical you so the emotional you can see her to.

 

[djdave]

if i saw a size 30 woman looking back as i look in the mirror i want to know what the surgeon had done as i went in for a gastric bypass as a man (big scream) sorry try to be light harted i know what you mean though i dont feel i have lost weight but my friends say i have i hope that they are not lieing to me dont think they are but you are still in doubt though.......

 

[pandora]

I deal daily with amputees & although its totally different from weight loss its still a body change . We tell them that your brain takes a good 3 months to catch up with what is happening to your body , hence we take longer to notice the changes in ourselves than other people do .

 

[yorkiegal]

thanks everyone. i just needed some reassurance i think.

I met marlon when he was opening our local poundland lol.

 

[amy_m]

You look fab and should be so proud of yourself 7 stones is fantastic. I feel the same way kind of I haven't lost no where near how much you have but what I think is that I have been big for so long I don't even have to look in the mirror I know every part of myself so I feel when I lose weight it might just take a little time to actually see how we are now. But a time will come when u don't need to tell yourself how much weight you've lost you'll be able to see it..... Hope that makes sense all I mean is give your mind time to adjust to how you look now xx

 

[Karen19745]

You can really see a difference, you look younger in the recent photos, I know it is hard to see the new you and believe what you're seeing, I like others have to look twice when I see a glimpse of myself in a shop window, I can't believe it's me,

Keep up the good work, and enjoy buying new clothes and strutting your stuff down the high street, Karen x

 

[Sharonimo]

I met marlon when he was opening our local poundland lol.

Ooooooh, thanks for that.

Must look for new Poundland openings !!! :8855:

 

[angiemason]

there is definitely a big difference someone once told me i look like mady dingle so maybe i could get cousin marlon to open ours we're having one in Morecambe soon no idea who's opening it though x

 

[yorkiegal]

he opens all the poundlands so you've a good chance of bumping into him lol.

 

[goodsoul86]

Its really interesting to hear you say this, Yorkiegal, because i often feel the same. I've lost coming on for 12.5 stone since last January and i simply don't see 12.5 stone of a difference when i look in a mirror.

I know there has been a difference - i'm told often enough on an almost daily basis by friends, family, colleagues, neighbours and old classmates but i don't see it to the same extent.

I'd definitely say that there is a lag between the mind and the body when it comes to weight loss so don't worry. I know that i'll eventually feel comfortable in my own skin but these things take time. It'll come.

 

[Debbie15]

You look fantastic, you have done great babe.

 

[Staffiemum]

Hi Yorkiegal, hun you look gorgeous. But I know where you are coming from. Since Sept I have lost 3 stone and gone down 4 dress sizes.. But it aint a size 18 that is looking back at me in the mirror. I still look at the size 26's when im out and have to remind myself that I can look in "normal" clothes shops now. It is all in my head I still find it difficult when putting food on my much smaller plate. My head is telling me you are still going to be hungry but my stomach is telling me you silly mare of course you cant eat all of it!!! But its only been a short journey so far and I have a a long way to go yet. So eventually me brain will catch up.