Why does it allways have to be so hard

[carol150]

i know i have a lot to be greatfull for as my mum is well and i have lost all my weight .but why does life keep kicking me in the teeth ? i love my new puppy but i am in tears here as i now have to give him up as my daurghter needs me to have the boys 3 days aweek as she needs to go back to work as they are strugling to pay the morgege and can not aford a child minder and i can not take george as they have a cat and she does not want the dog there and i dont thing it is fear to leave goergre with some one 3 times a week i love him to much for that .sorry have to go now cant write anymore:cry:

 

[blueeyes]

Oh honey that's so sad. I'm so sorry you have to give up the pup. I've been through this before and it's heartbreaking. Thinking of you xx

 

[Grace]

Sorry but why does your daughter have the right to ask this of you? Where is your right to a life?
I may be over-stepping the mark but I'd be telling your daughter to get rid of the cat or shut it in another room.
Grandmas have rights too!
You are being incredibly kind to your daughter in looking after you grand children: but your life is your own and if you love your puppy, keep him. Her kids are first and foremost HER responsibilty and her needs shouldn't wreck your happiness! Surely you can work out a compromise rather than just giving up what you want?
Forgive me if i've spoken out of place but sometimes it makes me so cross to see people being taken advantage of.
Grace xxx

 

[Jane]

I am really sorry that this has happened, and I don't want to cause any offence or upset you, but I am inclined to agree with Grace. Your daughter wants you to have her children so she can avoid childminder costs while working. That's fine and what mums do, but to expect you to give up your lovely little pup, in my opinion is taking it too far.

If she can't or won't have him at her house (if necessary by shutting the cat in another room), can the children not come to you?

When we had our dog Shellie she was a pup, and we already had a fully grown cat in the house - ok his nose was put out of joint for a while, but he soon got used to it and they get on well. If you are kind enough to help out your daughter then surely she can meet you in the middle somewhere?

Sorry if I sound ott, but you do deserve what you have worked so hard for.

 

[Katkit1]

Ooh Carol - I entirely agree with what Grace and Jane have said. Please do not act too hastily! You should`nt have to get rid of a family member that you love. Your not the one that should be in the doghouse!

Think you are going to have to be a strong mamma and put your foot down in this case!

Hope you can sort this out so that you can all benefit - I am sure the kids would love a little dog to play with and train. :chores016:

Take care hun x



Love Kat x

 

[Big an Bouncy]

With the girls here dont give your pup up.Her children are her responsibility,you would save her a fortune in minders fees and her mortgage isnt yours!You paid your own way now its her turn.Sorry but this generation wants everything and they want it yesterday.I know you love her and the kids but if she wont meet you half way on this thats her problem.Dont send George away,you and he need each other!Maz x

 

[RoseA]

Carol, I'm with everyone else... You can't give up your pup for this. If you're going to do your daughter this huge favour then I suggest the four-legged members of the family are introduced to each other and they will become friends. George is only a pup and it's the ideal time to do this. Ok so there might be fireworks initially, but read up on how to introduce them properly- take advice from your vet too - it can be done. We had a dog and a cat when I was a child and they were absolutely fine. in fact the cat mourned when we lost the dog. Sending hugs... xxx

 

[Craftslinda]

Hate to say this but I'm with them to, I am very lucky and have the best mum in the world who like you looks after my 3 children 3 days a week while i go to work. How ever we always work on grandma terms, she is the one doinng so much for us. Some days she comes to my house where we have a big black lab which her 2 little pups hate so my dog has to go out or hubby takes her to work. Some days I have to get up that little bit early to drop all 3 to her on way to work. At the end of the day she is saving me about £700 a month in child care so I never mind a bit. And we spoil her when ever we can to say thank you. I never expected my mum to do this for me I am the youngest of 3 sisters and my mum still worked when there's were little, and when I decided to go back to work I did have them all in child care and she just helped with dropping and collecting some days. It was her that said this is daft go part time and ill have them and we are still better off and I love her to bits and would never expect anything like this fom her. My parents 2 little dogs are there babies and if i'm honest i hate the bloody things they bark, sit on my sette and roll on my bed which my dog is never aloud to do but hay ho I live with it and would never say a word.

sorry to rant just amazed your even considering giving up your love for that pup. x

 

[Scarlet]

I'm sorry I'm with them all above too I love my bouncy pup so much ... He helps me through do much though other people in the house hate him!!

 

[lamornamiss]

I agree with the others.
My Mom won't look after my son.
Your daughter is lucky that you can/will have the children. Lots of grandparents work themselves now. Who would look after the kids if this were the case?
Even if you love your daughter and grandkids to bits she hasn't got the right to ask you to give up George

 

[dottychic]

Sorry hun but I also agree, you are the one doing the good deed for the daughter so it shouldnt be you making the sacrifice. Im sure her cat would be ok shut into another room, it would probably be fine with the pup anyway its hardly a bull mastiff The puppy would play with it probably get a few smacks off the cat and then be bored with it and leave it alone Please dont get rid of Gorgeous George! XXX

 

[biggy123]

I agree with everyone - please don't give up your wee dog. If introduced correctly there wont be any problems with the cat apart from a few swipes at the start.

I'd really recommend getting George a crate that you can leave at your daughters (and/or use to travel in the car) - this will give him his own space and allow you to have a few hours with the children without him running around.
All of my dogs have been crate trained and love their crates - its their wee space and they actually ask to go in at bedtime or when I'm doing noisy diy etc.

You've worked so hard with your fantastic weight loss and deserve to spend time with George - your daughter is being selfish in expecting you to give up your time and you dog to make HER life cheaper and easier.

 

[Karlos]

Tell your daughter you will have her child for free at your house. If she doesn't like it give her the yellow pages open at the registered child minder section.

You did your bit you brought her up. It's her responsibility to care and provide for her child not yours. You are doing her the favor here for chuff's sake. Keep the pup honey

 

[keeley86]

tell her to bog off, lol i know you love her but thats wat my mum would say to me and if i was in your shoes i wouldnt get rid of my dogs for no one... they are my babaies! why should you give up your baby to look after someone else's - daughter or not!
like sum1 else said.... having a puppy in the house 3 days a week is better than paying £100's pounds out on child care fees
lay down the law hun x

 

[carol150]

thanks all

thank you all for your kind words .i cant have the boys at mine as i am an hour away on a train and i have to be at her house to take the 5year old to school and pick him up at 3pm and i no the cat would get on with goerge as the cat is bigger than him.i think it is him that does not want the dog there i am getting annoyed at them now as they have allways treaded this mum alot better than me they go up there aleast once a week i never really see them down here and i only see the boys when i go up there and i have to go a train at £25.00 a time but then his family have more monney than me

 

[dottychic]

Arrggghhh, it makes me angry...it sounds like they are taking advantage of your good nature hun....Please dont be bullied into doing something you arent completely happy with. George is your puppy and you have waited ages to get him, dont give him up, you deserve to be happy too XX

 

[Bev]

Awww Bless You, I've only just read this thread....

Angel.... put your foot down!

There is no way anyone should be dictating your life to you and if anyone ever suggested that any of my three rescue dogs would be taken away from me, I would be horrified.

Our pets are in some ways our comfort blanket and we are to them, you've done brilliantly and have given up on so much so tell whoever to b... well get lost and work things around to suit you precious.

It can be done.

Never say never and never let ANYONE push you around.

Stand up and sort it Angel, with you all the way and message me if you need me to ring you... I know exactly how important our pets are to us and have ever sympathy with you.

Love and hugs... Bev xxx

 

[carol150]

thanks all

i know what you are saying but how can i choose the pup over my grankids as my daughter sayes they should come first and i no they will not let me see them so much if i choose goerge and plus i would feall so giluty .i cant win can i.

 

[Bev]

I think you can Carole... there are always ways of working around things Angel... please take time and take a closer look...

If you really do want the pup then I think you should have him precious... it is really a matter that is totally up to you to decide and no one else... I'd be upset too, but no one would push me around where my pets are concerned.

Think of logistics... and he won't be a puppy for ever!

Love and hugs xxx

 

[dottychic]

Its not choosing your pup over your grandkids and your daughter saying that just shows that shes trying to manipulate you, shes saying that to make you feel bad! Ask her what exactly you should do with George? Would she care? You have a commitment now to your pup, you cant just "get rid" She should understand this and work with you to find a solution. In my opinion the ball is in her court, you agree to mind the kids (she doesnt know how lucky she is!) and she has to sort out a way for George to come with you. Thats fair in my opinion. If she would even suggest that you cant see your grandkids if you dont comply then shes a very selfish not very nice woman! Sorry if thats harsh but I think you need to be a bit harsh with her. (HUG) XX