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BandedHuns Mad Fat Diary

BandedHun said:
Thanks bex. I just want to pay it forward. I know exactly how I felt going into this * I didn't like myself * I didn't look after myself * I felt hopeless * I felt suicidal * I was ashamed * I believed I would fail this and I wouldn't loose weight But I am where I am. I changed my mind set, I took every stall and changed my attitude. ( and trust we I've had 6 weeks of stall periods ) in the past Id binge on stalls now it's a positive, I buy something new when I'm 14 days into a stall. I've maintained. Y shouldn't I celebrate?!? But I'm still in my loss journey and then the hard work of becoming that size 8 girl forever. So today started great, I'm feeling better, hairdresser is coming to me all day to do my hair and my family's too. So I'll pop my new locks on here later... And the big news im 10st 10lbs! Whooooo feeling very small now, I know 10st 10 may seem heavy ESP when I started looking at the surgery forum on here and saw some ladies at 9st 7lbs but I'm five foot nine. My BMI today was 21!!!! That's the lowest I've ever had a BMI at ! I'm literally near the lowest I can be- never in a million years did I believe I could be that girl. All my Bras for now . They are strange I have a range or sizes but seems I'm a 34E or 36DD depends on the cut of bra but I look tiny chested they are so saggy. I'd love my boobs to be done but I don't think my OH would have it. After spending our savings on the band. Mind you. We got our savings back already .... Hummmmm ... Anyway so that's my news and feelings for today. I'm positive about everything ( bit concerned about how to stop loosing weight ) but other than that I'm good ;-) Happy rainy weds my beautful losers! ;-) :)
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I must admit, I do worry that if I go ahead with the band that I might fail. I know that's not the right attitude to have but it does concern me if I read that someone has only lost a small amount I start to panic a bit, especially as I'm paying for it! I just hope it is all a matter of following the rules and watching calorie intake. My problem is bingeing and massive plates of food, I can be good at the start of the day but towards the end I'm like a Hoover! So hoping the restriction will of a band will put stop to this.
I think you have done so well Banded, a real inspiration.
 
Please do not think your the only one who felt they would fail - we are expected to feel that way coz we fail every slimming club , diet plan we been on ... That's why we are here.

I was the same as you , binge and portions. Seems to me you will have great results. Your exactly like me. You just gotta wanna eat better, I still binge... But my binge will be 2 biscuits , a packet of crisps,,,, yes that's it and I'm stuffed, then if I feel even more self destructive that day I'll have a chocolate bar (50g one not 250g like pre band) !!!! That's what the band does for you!

Just believe in yourself and take one day at time ;-)
 
Every time I have a stall in my weight loss I fear that I will fail at this. As banded said we are all so used to failing at weight loss. I am taking the view that this is a marathon not a sprint. I want results like banded has had or Chrystal, but.......what if it's slower, so what. I have list just shy of 2 1/2 stone. How pleased with this would I have been a years ago I used to do the deal with the big man upstairs and the conversation in my head would be..right God, I'm not asking for much. Three stone and I would be satisfied. I am happy to sit at 12 stone...surely three stone is doable, come on, big man let me have three stone!!!

Now I want 6 lol....but I'm less than a stone away from what I used to bargain for/ plead for

I have come down from a 24 to an 18ish. I am delighted and will stop being frustrated at my 2lb a week average weight loss. If I keep this up by this time next year I would look like Kate moss on speed!

I am having faith in me. I am having faith in this band. I am 7 weeks banded today

Good luck
 
Kirsty I would be happy with 1-2lb a week, as always with a diet the first few weeks are fine but then I waver and I can't even lose 1lb. No doubt I will be crying out for help when I go ahead, as I don't think hubby quite 'gets it'. I think you and Banded and many others on WLS have had great success, and hope I do too!
 
Well said Kirsty! That's exactly the way it should be, it's your journey go at your pace, I only show u all to prove it CAN BE done. It CAN. It CAN change your life ;-)
 
Same here guys, I would long to see 1-2lb less in the scales every week, it was heartbreaking when it wouldn't move!!
But I remember the feeling u get when those numbers are decreasing on the scales!
I am hoping to banish those feelings of self loathing and dis belief.
When the journey / weightloss starts is this when my mind set should change too?!
The reason I ask is, at the moment I have 3 weeks left before my pre op diet and all I can do is eat, I think it's because I know I can?! However I'd love to get in the mindset of my life is changing and I must eat a certain way?! Will that come? Am I just being greedy or is this normal? Xx
 
bex.wils said:
Same here guys, I would long to see 1-2lb less in the scales every week, it was heartbreaking when it wouldn't move!! But I remember the feeling u get when those numbers are decreasing on the scales! I am hoping to banish those feelings of self loathing and dis belief. When the journey / weightloss starts is this when my mind set should change too?! The reason I ask is, at the moment I have 3 weeks left before my pre op diet and all I can do is eat, I think it's because I know I can?! However I'd love to get in the mindset of my life is changing and I must eat a certain way?! Will that come? Am I just being greedy or is this normal? Xx
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If you read my posts on my blog i was the same. Put over half a stone on between my consultation and pre op diet. (2wks). I felt really depressed at the self sabotage. You can think about it two ways. Either you enjoy yourself and get it all out and no regrets or you can start your WL journey earlier and get results earlier.

The weight will come off either way. X
 
I was so bloody terrified of the surgery that I started a pre op diet as soon as I saw my surgeon. I reckoned I wanted my liver to be as small as possible so was on per op for 16 days though only told to do a week. How ironic is it that my liver was nicked during surgery and required a repair lol
 
I think we all grieve for the loss of food after all it's like giving up put comfort toy since a young age . If u had to throw it in the bin and you couldn't use it to comfort u any longer you'd do as much to spend time with it as possible, this being the same that we do for the surgery, it's big commitment, a big step to say I don't want to eat like that any more. For me I buy now. I'm a massive spender. I don't spend on food anymore, it's clothes, presents for people, and coffee! Lol

We did some xmas shopping today which is nice. But I had my hair down yesterday and it was down and the rain showers are a nightmare so ended up getting a wooly hat to stop the rain getting my hair! I just wanted a cheap one and ended up spending £24 on a miss self ridge one! Doh!

I absolutely feel rubbish today got a stinking cold but it won't break so it's just sitting in my throw like razor blades and my sinuses. Yes this photo is on the school run in my hat feeling like death.... Grrrrr! Love the hat though so pleased I got it . TOTM started today too and I'm meant to be going for target this week at slimming world being 10:10 so no longer pay for sessions. Well I'm still 10/10 today so happy with that if I can maintain that for Saturday morning, then try for 3lbs before Xmas! Yaye.

One thing I am really struggling with and im not sure if ya'll get that this but I'm so fatigued a lot, not sure if the cold making it hard but my energy is zapped so much ESP after a fill ... Hummm I need to feel good. Not crappy and poorly. Doh.

Anyway curry picture for dinner will be uploaded and I hope your all having a schmazing day :)
 

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Love the hat Banded! x
 
Banded hav u always gone to SW classes?
Do they know u have been banded or not?!
I still feel the need to go to class, not necessarily for the meetings but definitely to get weighed as I do not trust myself to do it efficiently and weekly. I think I would forget or have a bad week and just wait another few days!! I still feel when I am banded that I would like to go, it's still a weight loss journey and the band is a tool to help along the way.
Banded I love the hat!! U look so happy!
I'm away this weekend with my friend that I dont see very often so we will hav a great weekend going for tea and doing generally pretty exciting things, I think I will start my pre op on Monday, this will give me 2 weeks on it, this will help me get in the zone and hopefully it won't be too much of a shock to my body if I start a week in advance to ease myself into it.
Xx
 
No I lost most my weight just cutting down with the band. I found I struggled with meals and fresh way of life, I'd happily eat junk just little bits within my calories, then when my daugther got back from holiday she had put on so much weight and I felt for her so to help her and my sister I joined with them, plus it's a good cover up story, as this is only known to my OH and one friend, that's it, no one else has a clue. Apart from them now constantly saying how tiny I am... #angryface.

That's great your having a weekend with a friend and ore op diet starts Monday you will ace it and operation day will come round so quickly,


I , with this IOS8 software deleted the picture of my hair before before I had it done so now I can't sshow u a comparison ( gutted ) I just took a quick picture, but I hate these sort of pictures look like the selfie queen and I'm feeling really self conscious today . That people are staring at me for my looks/ weight loss. It's horrible. My OH made a comment and we are not talking at the moment so I feel pretty crappy as well as being ill. Just want these flu like symptoms to go away! :-(
 

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Thanks Sharon, I'm feel a tad self conscious at the mo. Just want to cover up xx
 
Thanks,
Woken up feeling bloated, heads pounding haven't slept well at all but never mind, I'm baby sitting my 11 month old nephew today, he's hard work ... Urgh with a cold too
 
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