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Being Positive about US!!!

topsy said:
Over the months i have been a member of minis i have read many threads about the ignorance and rudness of other people to those of us who are 'downright wholesome'!!!!! (salt of the earth we are)

I have in the past even replied my disgust to some of these threads but i'm sorry i am becoming tired of seeing such threads now.

WE are sooooo much better than these people and yet we give up our thoughts and our time to write about them hear WHY???????

I have come across many of these people since i became 'wholesome' but do you know i don't give a monkey about them why should i????? They are rude, ignornant and of small brain - they are usually slim, immaculately dressed and have a nose that they could look down on the whole of the world from!!!!!

But they are not us - they are not wholesome of body or of thought. They don't care about others (only about themselves).

So i think we need to make a pact and just IGNORE these people - i would much rather read threads about all of you and your progress, your problems, your rants and your laughs.

I hope i haven't upset any one as this was not meant to upset but to unite us as a strong and supportive body for each other.

Sending you all hugs and fairy dust - cos your worth it xx

:bliss::bliss::bliss::bliss:
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wtg.gif
well said xx
 
Topsy, I agree with you about these silly people however I am one of those people who can not deal with their stupid attitudes. I take it all to heart. I wish I could ignore them but I can't. It HURTS. I have had a life time of problems regarding my weight issues and this is the only place where I feel "normal". I would be lost without the support of the great people on mini who truly understand me and my struggles in life as an obese person.
 
Thinking about it over the day it has really emphasised to me how VITAL it is that we can share our negative experiences with rude and ignorant. I don't agree Topsy babe that we are giving the ignorant and rude space- it is us and our concerns and hurts that we are sharing with people who can truly empathise that we are giving space to. I would hate to feel that anyone might be put off sharing an upsetting experience and lose the community support we get here.
Lv Jen x
 
jen i couldn't agree more. some people are isolated enough and if on the rare occasion they do get to go out they should encounter some ignoramouse that upsets them they need to be able to share it rather than bottle it up and become more isolated.
 
I know it hurst when people say things. BUT it is how you react to that hurt that makes you the stronger person.

It is not just overweight people, but any person who is vulnerable seems to be a target for rude and arrogant people.

So regardless of why you rude comments, you need to look deep inside and realise you are a far better person than they will ever be. Yes it hurts what they say but be STRONG.

You never see strong confident people (regardless of weight) getting bullied. Stand up for yourself and it will be the last time they say anything.
 
I understand really i do - yes some people are isolated and this site may be the only way to get things off their chests but i'm sorry i still feel we need to be positive on how we handle these people and situations

Sending hugs with fairy dustxx
 
topsy said:
I understand really i do - yes some people are isolated and this site may be the only way to get things off their chests but i'm sorry i still feel we need to be positive on how we handle these people and situations

Sending hugs with fairy dustxx
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Yes , we could round them all up, put them on a huge ship and toss them overboard in the middle of the Atlantic...Give the sharks a belly ache!

lol

(((hugs)))
 
Oh dear - I'm really sitting on the fence on this one! Whilst I agree that we need to offload all the pain caused by these awful people I also think that by writing it down their comments are given weight (pardon the pun) and become more 'important' than they really are. The old saying goes 'Least said, soonest mended' and I think that applies here, too. By putting it into print we make their comments real and then we can't brush them away as if they don't matter. xx
 
couldnt agree more with you
Sammy x
 
zetacatty said:
Oh dear - I'm really sitting on the fence on this one! Whilst I agree that we need to offload all the pain caused by these awful people I also think that by writing it down their comments are given weight (pardon the pun) and become more 'important' than they really are. The old saying goes 'Least said, soonest mended' and I think that applies here, too. By putting it into print we make their comments real and then we can't brush them away as if they don't matter. xx
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Exactly M - that's what i think too. I don't think these people (who don't give us a second thought) deserve to be here. Sending you hugs with fairy dust xx
 
I agree with your sentiment Topsy it would be lovely not to read about all the negativity and hurtful comments that the lovely people on here have suffered. But i think your wrong in saying we shouldnt give it airspace. For some people the only place they can say they are hurting is here. Not everyone has a partner or a family that can understand the pain and humiliation felt by us when these ignoramus hurt us. Me personally i'd rather everyone gave vent to their feelings on here and maybe even got mad than shed one tear into a cushion sitting on a sofa at home feeling alone and without a friend who understood them. You have to live in a fat person's shoes to feel a fat person's pain i'm afraid xx

ps, i hope this doesn't stop me getting fairy dust when i need it!
 
Whilst I respect everyone views here...I think we should just let people here on Mini's do what is ultimately best for them!...If they will feel better by telling us what has happened to them, I for one would have to help them by at least letting them know that they have been heard and reaffirming that they did not deserve the offence done to them.

Some people really need to vent, and putting thoughts and emotions on paper (print) is actually a recognised form of therapy and it is very helpful for some people....It is a form of sharing...And sharing is actually what bonds friends and family together

With this subject, it's no different to tuning in to a program on TV that you know will contain things that are going to upset you, but it's a subject close to your heart...you need the information, you are sure that the information will help you cope or aid others....(I love programs about animals but as soon as I know one is going to die, I switch off...but at least I have the information I need)

I look at writing about these people as putting them in the "stocks", their actions there for all to see; they might just see how despised they have become...In our local rag they put up the pictures of those nasty pieces of work who have bullied, robbed or even killed someone on buses through cctv...Good will always win over evil...it's still "thankfully" human nature to be good...Let's show them up for all their nastiness...

You say that you don't want to give these scum buckets air time by writing about them, but I say that whilst they are not worth the time of day...we are, and we deserve to share all our experiences good or bad with like minded friends who will always understand and empathise with what we have gone through...It's good to share all our experiences with our friends.

We come first, not the bumholes who cause the pain in the first place...Why should we allow them to shut us up?

(((hugs)))
 
phatmomma said:
I agree with your sentiment Topsy it would be lovely not to read about all the negativity and hurtful comments that the lovely people on here have suffered. But i think your wrong in saying we shouldnt give it airspace. For some people the only place they can say they are hurting is here. Not everyone has a partner or a family that can understand the pain and humiliation felt by us when these ignoramus hurt us. Me personally i'd rather everyone gave vent to their feelings on here and maybe even got mad than shed one tear into a cushion sitting on a sofa at home feeling alone and without a friend who understood them. You have to live in a fat person's shoes to feel a fat person's pain i'm afraid xx

ps, i hope this doesn't stop me getting fairy dust when i need it!
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Not at all - fairy dust is for everyone xx
 
Snowcrystal - Thank you and very well said!

The people who hurt us will not be reading this site so they will not gain any fame or further satisfaction from their actions. They just walk away laughing while people like me will be hurting.

I am so grateful to this site where I am free to be myself even when I am at my lowest.
 
Thanks Topsy i am always glad for fairy dust...

It's a good topic, and one that could be argued for a while i am guessing. Here's to less negativity and more positivity xxx
 
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