Disheartened after consultation :-(

[Fatass40]

Hi Beth

I'm also 40 with a 3.5yr old & an 18mth old so understand completely the stresses and strains of everyday life. I went back to work in September after maternity :-(
I actually have a band and have done since April 2008 when I was banded in Belgium. I fell pregnant in the November so perhaps I've never really given the band a proper opportunity to work but I've had nothing but issues. I never lost weight and am now teetering around 19st... Again. I've done all the diets and like you have been overweight since a child. I also had to have my school skirt made @ 11yrs old as the regulation ones did not fit!
I am now on the cusp of going for revision surgery from band to either sleeve or bypass. I don't think I'm alone in struggling with the band and it seems to be being paired-down in favour of the sleeve.

My advice, for what it's worth, is don't rush in to anything. Do talk with others but think seriously about the kind of eater you are. As Kat has said, I struggle with good food but can eat chocolate til it's coming out of my ears (& I do!). I throw up very regularly & do worry about the damage this may have done. I'm looking at going to see Mr Ammori with Healthier Weight at the mo, I think. He is experienced at revision surgery which is impt to me. I was scared of the bypass when I went for the band.. Now I'm just scared of failing... Again!!
Claire xx

 

[Beth72]

Hi Claire, thanks for your post. I'm sorry to hear the band hasn't been a good experience for you, but I appreciate your feedback as we sound similar with our eating habits in response to stress/emotions. The more I'm reading, the more I'm thinking I won't be suited to a band either - saying that, I need to do something as I'm at my heaviest & lying in bed anxious & depressed as I feel such a failure.....why can't I break the vicious cycle when I have 2 lovely children?! Guess it's the added stress that has infact made my eating worse - just grabbing junk like crisps at the 1st sign of stress to be able to cope! I worry that if I have the band, I'd lose that crutch & wouldn't be able to cope at all, hence abuse it :-(

I'm actually going to be starting counselling in a few weeks & will try to push for some CBT to see if any of this helps with my eating habits. Hard to imagine any other long term behaviour as coped this way for so long!

Would be really interested to hear how you get on with Prof Ammouri - I've spoken to HW also & was debating coming across for a consultation about a sleeve. It does sound like a better WLS option for me than the band, altho bigger op/more risks during surgery, but less aftercare required in terms of follow up. Please let me know how you get on x

 

[Fatass40]

Good luck Dee!!!! X

 

[Fatass40]

Hi Beth.. I think you'll be having your before mine at this rate.i've made tentative enquiries with HW and need to book a consultation with Dr Ashton.i'm Midlands based but am likely to go to Manchester for the op just for the surgeon. Funding is an issue with us as we have a very large mortgage & I work for the civil service so job cuts are a plenty. Hubby works in local gov't so it's a worry! I wish I'd done it before returning to work tho' as I want mine to be private. My mum & dad don't know I've been banded ... Only a handful of friends.

I think 40 must be the age at which we start to evaluate life (& start to feel the effects of our excesses!) my back really hurts and I've suffered with a very painful hip since being pregnant with my first. I feel older & less able than my, almost 80 yr old, parents! Neither of them have weight problems (I'm adopted) and am quite sure that my habits are as a result of my upbringing... Finding comfort in food when unable to find it elsewhere. Who knows .. It's probably another excuse!!

I'm possibly having a work secondment until December which will mean that I'll probably have to wait until the new year. If I don't get it, then I'm booking myself in ASAP!!

Good luck with CBT, I had considered paying privately for some. I have a friend who has just completed a hypnotherapy diploma so she's going to do some work around confidence with me... Should be interesting!!

Take care & have a good Sunday xx

 

[Beth72]

Good luck Dee! Hope it all goes well & look forward to hearing updates of your progress. If it were just me & hubby, think I'd definitely give Czech a serious thought, but the idea of taking a 6 month old over isn't something I'd be comfortable with, so it'd mean me going alone - sound like a real wimp, but don't think I'd dare!

Claire, have you heard of any other good surgeons for the sleeve in the UK or mainly Dr Amouri? I think it's hard sussing out a really good surgeon as there are so many on here. I do keep getting scared too of complications etc, so trying to do as much research as possible. Think my problems with food started following my parents break up at 11 as remember sneaking downstairs for biscuits & choc when I should have been in bed, trying not to get caught by avoiding the floorboards which creaked!!!! I'm almost sounding like a food criminal, but sadly the addiction to comfort foods started around then. Sadly it's my guilty pleasure & hard to imagine not having it, but need to do something before I get something serious - knees knackered already. Would a sleeve help I wonder - will be asking at my consultation tomorrow.

It's a shame you may have to wait until next year if you have work secondment. Have you thought about going to your gp for funding if you can't have it done until then? I must admit, hadn't thought about going through gp as don't know how long waiting lists are, but think I'd probably qualify as BMI is 41.

Trying to do some word games to knock up my posts a bit so that I can have access to more things, but it's seeming to take forever to get to 50 posts!! X

 

[Fatass40]

Hi Beth

I think there are loads of great surgeons in the UK. I checked out Healthier Weight's surgeons and then researched online. I've read that Prof Ammouri is very experienced at revision surgery which is more complicated than a first-timer... Scar tissue/swelling etc.. So he seems to be a good bet my geography is rubbish so not sure what private hospitals are near Leeds but I'm sure there will be plenty. I'll see what I can find out for you.

My secondment would be paid.. It's more about feeling bad organising an op whilst I'm on a new project that I was worried about. Also, I'm quite worried about how I'm going to explain it (altho' the doc will write a sick note apparently just saying post op pain.

Unfortunately my PCT will only fund if BMI is over 50 & I think has co-morbidities... So that rules me out. Waiting times tend to be ridiculous too so I'd rather fund myself and not have to jump through numerous hoops!

Good luck for your consultation & do let me know what they say xx