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Down and Depressed

Alia

New Member
Good evening all... just felt the need to write something. Its 3 weeks tomorrow since I had my gastric bypass and I've lost 25 pounds... bet your all thinking I should be happy with that but heres the thing. My weight has n't changed for about 5 days now and its really getting me down. I'm practially eating nothing (still on the liquid/puree stage) and for the first time in my life I can say not a bad thing has passed my lips. So why is n't my weight going down. I feel totally miserable. I picked a fight with my husband that was n't neccessary and went on all day and left me questioning my whole marriage when there is no reason to what so ever. My husband is totally devoted to me and our son and we've never had an argument between ourselves but today I managed to convince myself that we should n't even be married. Thats not me, I love him more than life its self but I focused on something small and turned it into a whole drama thats left my husband totally shell shocked, he did n't see that one coming at all.. nor did I till half way through this morning. I'm fed up cause although I feel fine I'm not able to get out and about cause my wound is open in about 5 places and leaking some kind of fluid so thats leaving me frustrated. I'm not the kind of person that can sit down and do nothing, even as big as I was I still was on the go all day. I feel like I want to pull my hair out and scream... has any one else felt like this, its like a black cloud looming over me... dam I could eat loads on slimming world and still lose weight but here I am after surgery and the pounds are not moving.

Sorry for the rant :(
 
I know how you feel. Ive stayed the same for a few days and feel frustrated too. Guess its our bodies storing fat, due to the low calorie intake. It is so deflating and annoying after putting your body through surgery though and makes you want to take it out on everyone around you. Try and be a little kinder to yourself and keep your chin up. The weight will drop off soon enough. Take care of yourself. Kind regards R x
 
Dont really have anything to say huni but didnt wanna look & not post
((((((hug)))))))

ps 25lb is really really good and there are bound to be ups and downs on the journey xxx
 
Hey, rant away, thats what this forum is here for, the good and the bad. I dont know much about WLS but I do know what its like to feel a bit mince. its only been 3 weeks since you had quite a big procedure and I would imagine it takes a long time to heal and adjust to a totaly new regime. Its bound to leak out emotionally and its natural to feel gulity and bad about snapping at the ones you love. But thats who you feel secure to do that with and they will understand. Often found the body does weird things during weight loss. Whatever route you choose. Couple of weeks with hardly any loss then, bam a biggy. It will come, but I do understand how frustrating it is when you've worked hard and went through a lot for it. Wish you all the best with the rest of your journey, it will come xxxxx
 
i am echoing another person's advice -- be kind to yourself, cuz in the end, you are all you got -- you're stuck with yourself, so you gotta be your own best friend not an enemy!

and btw, i am here for you 201%!!!!!!!!!!

and yes...use this space to rant and vent...its a very friendly place...
 
5 days is nothing your body will still be getting used to the major change a bypass brings you cant always loose on a daily basis, weekly is better,

liz x
 
Hi hun. What you are feeling is completely normal, after surgery we are all on a bit of a rollercoaster emotionally. You will have dark days during recovery and it will get better. When you are able, just tell your hubbs that you are not really yourself yet and that you are just frustrated, he'll understand. I have torn into my hubbs a few times and thought where did that come from? It is normal and you are still early in your recovery & dealing with your wounds.

As for the weight, it could just be that your body is adjusting, give it time. 25 lbs gone is fan-flipping-tastic so don't worry and get off those scales. Also, this is something I seem to say alot but are you eating enough? Are you fitting in 6 servings per day of protein? If you aren't that could be the culprit. The body reserves fat if it thinks it is starving. Remind your body it is not starving by boosting your protein. I wouldn't really worry though, you have lost a bunch already so it will just take time for the next big loss.

(((Hugs Hun)));)
 
Hi Alia, Just wondered if anyone has seen your wound - GP or nurse? Sounds like you ought to have it assessed if it is open and leaking specially if you are 3 weeks post op.As for standstill in weightloss I think alot of us experience it. The body has to get used to changes and possibly decides to hang on to all our calories if it thinks starvation is occuring. Most important thing is get your wound looked at. Heather xx
 
Oh yes, I know exactly these feelings! I was the same for about a month out, especially when I hit the plateau & lost no weight for a while "woe is me .. it's failed .. I've failed .. why did I do it .." It is your body going into starvation mode - it's in shock!

It will start again soon, & you'll feel better too! Just take each day at a time, talk to your hubby about what you are feeling (from the sound of him he'll understand anyway) & hang in there - it gets better.

I am now just over 3 months post op & (not that this will probably console you much!) it is only in the past couple of weeks I have thought, hey this ain't so bad & I HAVE done the right thing.

'This too shall pass' is an expression you will think of often, especially in the early days!

Hang in there! And FANTASTIC well done on the 25lbs already ... that's almost 2 stone you know!!
 
You have been given great advice and encouragement by the others. Try and talk to your husband about how you are feeling. And try not to worry about the weight loss it is early days
And well done on the pounds lost so far
Irene x
 
Good morning guys and thank you all so much for taking the time to post here and give me words of encouragement.

Phatgirl I think you have put the nail on the head, I really don't think I'm taking in enough protein or enough of anything really. Cause I'm not feeling hungry (a totally new concept for me cause I used to be hungry 24/7), I'm forgeting to eat at all and sometimes it can be like 4 o'clock in the afternoon and I'll suddenly realise I've had nothing to eat.

I need to look at ways to get the protein into me, I don't do meat so I think I'll have to up the yoghurts and milk and maybe try to get some egg in there too. Calorie wise I worked out that some days I'm only having as little as 200 - 300 calories and I think that is not enough. Last night I was thinking and was tempted to go on to slimfast or something like that because then I know that I'm getting all the goodness that I need. Has any one else gone down that route. Then I think I have n't gone through all this pain to have bloody milkshakes but I know they work and I know I'd be getting all the protein that I need. :sigh:

I've always been hard on myself, doing any diet that I've followed over the years. I go for months and months of total restriction 100% and loose loads and loads of weight and cause I've restricted everything I have a major blow out then the whole thing falls apart and I can't follow the diet any more and all the weight goes back on. 'sigh'

Weight is still the same this morning.

MMMM I think another reason maybe that I haven't gone to the toilet (number 2, sorry for being graphic) for days and days and even then its been the tiniest amount possible. I've been taking iron as a daily supplement and the doctor supplied senokot (bad spelling) but I'm wondering if the iron is making me not go and that might make a difference to the weight loss or am I just clutching at straws??​
 
Morning hun. Not eating enough calories + iron supplements + not enough water (just guessing if you are not eating you aren't drinking, correct me if I am wrong) = constipation big time. That will really make weight stop comming off you and make you very irritable. I would use the senakot asap so you can get going again. You could stop your iron for a few days until you get back on track, your food intake and bowel movements are more important than iron for a few days.:)

If the shakes will help you, I say go for it. Right now healthy nutrition on a daily basis is most important. Try using one shake a day (morning maybe) to get you going and then add regular food (are you still in purees?) as you can and see how you do. You need to strive for more calories so up your milk, yogurt, eggs whatever you fancy. Heck, a really milky hot choc (I use options) is tasty and filled with goodness plus it is hydrating.

Hun you are doing great and you have had a lot to cope with. Baby yourself a bit and then you will be back on track and losing faster than ever. Just don't forget to fuel your body or you will run out of energy and feel icky.

(((BUG HUGS)))
Nichole;)
 
Hi, Sorry not replied sooner, I can only re confirm alot of what phatgirl has said...

I know the whole rollercoaster thing and the picking arguments, i did it all the time.......... you have been threw a major experience and it takes time for your body to get back to it's self...... You will get there, I went threw some very very dark stages and never thought i would come out......... but you will get there..... as for the non weightloss, my deitician explains it as your body goes into shcok and thinks what the hell is going on here!!!!!!!! so it holds onto everything you have, I struggled like you with the eating for various reasons but my main one is if im not hungry then why should i eat, you need to up your meal intake and eat regualar and you will see the weight moving again!!!

Feel free to pm me anytime I will alsways help if I can... You are doign great! Chin up hunny sending you big hug
 
Hi Alia,

Just reading your thread and Im sorry to hear that you are going through a rough patch at the moment, but as the others have said on here....it will get better for you.
I hope that you and your Hubby are talking to each other again...it sounds as if you have a very solid relationship, so just sit down together and talk.
As for the constipation....is your body telling you that you need to go, or is it that you think you should be going because you havent been for a few days? One thing my Consultant told me was that because you are not eating like you did before, you are taking in less, therefor you will expel less and wont go to the loo as often as you are used to.
I hope things improve for you.

Kerry-Ann
xxx
 
Hi Alia,
I have just been reading through the thread, sorry to hear how you a feeling at the moment with your weight not mooving- try and put in in perspective though 25lbs is an AMAZING loss!!!:bliss:
I think Nichole's suspicions could be right, it could just be that you are consipated and need to drink moore fluids?
Try to stay possitive, you have done amazing! It sounds like you have got a lovely husband, just talk to him about how you are feeling- communication is the key!!.
Xxx Lizzie xxX
 
Difficult times !!!!! The operation is different for everyone, we each experience our own emotions and trials. I was, I thought, prepered for the experience both physicly and mentally but it wasnt the case, the mental side of things has been extremely difficult on me and I have even aloud the thought of suicide to creep into my mind at times.
What you have achieved is fantastic, try not to be to hard on yourself, we all lose weight differently, I lost alot of weight quickly then virtually stopped losing for a couple of weeks then I dropped some more quickly again so theres no real pattern to it.
You gotta work hard at this sometimes, having the op was the straw that broke the camels back for my marriage because I allowed it to get to me far to much.
Keep your chin up and just take each day as it comes, it will get better, it does for everyone eventually.
 

I hope you find this useful as this lady describes feeling low and depressed after surgery and like the comments friends have posted here, the responses to her video are also encouraging. I've yet to go through surgery myself but I understand what you are feeling is not uncommon. Here's hoping you overcome this difficult period soon and find more joy in what you've achieved so far and that's fantastic.

Scales give or take away joy. Take back your power and don't be a slave to them. If you are being weighed officially monthly or whenever, stick with that WI and ditch your scales for now. They seem more foe than friend at the moment.
 
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