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February 2015 Surgeries
- Thread starter moo842
- Start date
siana58
New Member
I can't see it at all, definite touch of body dysmorphia going on in my poor old noggin. I'll try and post the pics later
Cherub08
New Member
It's amazing isn't it Siana how we perceive ourselves and what we still think is our size! I still think I'm bigger than the average lady at work. I'm now 16 size in most places and if my tummy had gone down more would probably be 14! Yet I still see myself as big and bigger than everyone. This week when walking past full length mirrors, I have done double takes because I actually look quite normal and people are shocked to hear how much more weight I need to lose and they think I'm in a much smaller dress size than I actually am, others think I have also shrunk in height! Weird.
This week I saw the specialist nurse and consultant, my partner told me after the meeting that I looked thinner than the specialist nurse! Feels and sounds very odd to me.
What you saw in the mirror is how you are now Hun! Enjoy xx
This week I saw the specialist nurse and consultant, my partner told me after the meeting that I looked thinner than the specialist nurse! Feels and sounds very odd to me.
What you saw in the mirror is how you are now Hun! Enjoy xx
siana58
New Member
I am driving my daughter's mad by continuously asking them if I look alright in New or not been worn for years clothes! On the scales though my BIN is still over 30 and I could do with losing another 3 or 4 stone. Been having a couple of weeks of heavy duty socialising so have had more wine than I should, knocking that on the head after tonight.
Tules
Member
All well guys...we are getting there. I am also chuffed to see I look normal now. On metro, don't have to avoid eye contact in case someone (again) thinks I am pregnant and give me their seat. The horror...the horror..
Mind you still trying to fit in jeans and shop sizes are bizarre! I am either size 12 (primark), 14 (M&S) or 16 (gap).
I am sure, like you I am getting everyone (including the lady at metro ticket booth) telling me how much weight I lost. I have no qualms about telling about the operation. It is what it is. Everyone has been encouraging and praising so far - I just hope I will maintain.
Siana, enjoy your social get together.
Love to you all.
Xx
Mind you still trying to fit in jeans and shop sizes are bizarre! I am either size 12 (primark), 14 (M&S) or 16 (gap).
I am sure, like you I am getting everyone (including the lady at metro ticket booth) telling me how much weight I lost. I have no qualms about telling about the operation. It is what it is. Everyone has been encouraging and praising so far - I just hope I will maintain.
Siana, enjoy your social get together.
Love to you all.
Xx
siana58
New Member
One thing I have noticed is how little people say when you want them to. I have some really "good" friends who have not said a word about how I look since February, and I wonder why. Even if someone else mentions it in their company it's a subject that just doesn't get commented on. In fact they avoid saying anything at all. One is a bigger lady, and even when I offered her two bin liners full of clothes (we have swapped clothes around many times) she was grateful but no comment on the weight loss. Strangely, I phoned her the other day to say that I had some great pieces that would do her for work and got a very curt response. Also my mum visited for the first time since March.....not a bloody word, in fact I ended up asking her what she thought....and there was a fairly vague nod of approval. However the ladies in my work restaurant congratulate me every week, there is a lady in my local supermarket who does the same, as do various random folk. I wonder whether people are uncomfortable with such a change, even if it's obviously beneficial for me?
So the emotional side of this process is confusing for me, and my nearest and dearest appear to have a bit of a problem too. My other half and kids are great, in the beginning they said I was being over sensitive, but now they agree that there has been a shift in the dynamic of certain relationships, and I'm wondering whether that shift is unfortunately permanent.
niccie
Well-Known Member
My mum thinks I could do it without surgery, although she tries to be encouraging it's not real. I think I'd rather she didn't say anything. Friday she took me to have a cup of tea with a nice neighbour and her sister, we were all big girls apart from
My mum whose size 12. I couldn't believe she was going on about her trousers being tight and showed us her very tiny tummy, very inappropriate but what I've had my whole life.... The other 2 did not look impressed, she cannot begin to understand what it is like and she certainly can't emphasise. So if they can't be genuine I would rather they didn't say anything x
My mum whose size 12. I couldn't believe she was going on about her trousers being tight and showed us her very tiny tummy, very inappropriate but what I've had my whole life.... The other 2 did not look impressed, she cannot begin to understand what it is like and she certainly can't emphasise. So if they can't be genuine I would rather they didn't say anything x
mouse57
Active Member
I think I have worked it out as to why people don't say anything, it's because they would be admitting to,you that you were over weight, especially those you have known for a long time. I also think in a strange way they may even feel guilty for not saying something to you earlier to encourage you to lose weight so you wouldn't have to have had surgery. Just my own observation from people I know.
kaps
New Member
Hey Siana. Your so called 'friends' seem to be the fair weather kind. Probably the were friends with you earlier because it made then feel good about themselves. Now obviously the dynamics have changed. At the same time your attitude towards them remains unchanged, nevertheless the positive improvement in your self-confidence and self-esteem must have surely made these 'friends' uncomfortable. So don't worry. I have felt similar vibes coming from a few 'friends' (even though most of the people have been extremely encouraging and genuinely happy with my achievements). All that matters is your other half, your children and your faith in yourself. So go ahead and lose some more, have an occasional wine, remain focused on your goal and carve out your path towards a healthier and more fulfilling life. Cheers to all of us.
Pain is... Weakness leaving the body... Cheers and Regards... Kaps
Tules
Member
Yes i agree some people say nothing, and when considering the huge chance, it is strange. I found people saying " you look well, or you look great" kind of diplomatic. So you say oh yeah, I lost weight.
I agree with Mouse that some people may refrain making a comment to avoid declaring I was big before.
A lot of people around me a slimmer, I found a few people who are now bigger than me, avoiding me.
I just feel.happy to look normal really.
And yes, I remember those size 8/10 mums moaning about putting on one pound on, showing their "huge" belly....whilst I was I was right next to them, size 16 (then...got to 18 later). Grr
Grrrr
I think people will settle down and accept us as we are soon.
Most importantly, we should enjoy it...... we are getting healthy... looks secondary. That's what I say, I did it to prevent future serious health problems and now I feel much better.
Enjoy new you guys and girls. It is here to stay.
I agree with Mouse that some people may refrain making a comment to avoid declaring I was big before.
A lot of people around me a slimmer, I found a few people who are now bigger than me, avoiding me.
I just feel.happy to look normal really.
And yes, I remember those size 8/10 mums moaning about putting on one pound on, showing their "huge" belly....whilst I was I was right next to them, size 16 (then...got to 18 later). Grr
Grrrr
I think people will settle down and accept us as we are soon.
Most importantly, we should enjoy it...... we are getting healthy... looks secondary. That's what I say, I did it to prevent future serious health problems and now I feel much better.
Enjoy new you guys and girls. It is here to stay.
weegie
Active Member
Cherub08
New Member
Siana, your post made me feel sad in that I can't understand why some people respond the way you describe.........is it that they don't feel they have a right to comment talking about people's weight can be a sensitive issue and sometimes stigmatised and some people I think are perhaps feeling jealous. True friends will be honest, will tell you how amazing you look and will help you shop or respect your dietary needs.
Enjoy the positive comments you get, in fact, positively bask in them! Xx
Enjoy the positive comments you get, in fact, positively bask in them! Xx
Llora
Well-Known Member
Or maybe they are just that kind of people who just dont comment on peoples' weight?
gain or loss? I would never comment about that even to a close friend unless they asked or raised that subject themselves.
Tules
Member
Llora's message just shows why some people refrain from making a comment and I understand that..... though I would find it strange if friends did not comment.
Last time when I lost weight through Lighter Life, one "friend" said absolutely nothing. When the subject came up, she said "see, I never notice or pay attention to if a friend is over weight , I take them as they are..." frankly ,I thought it was because she was so self absorbed, paying attention to me was not on agenda. I clearly looked better... I complemented on her hair, lipstick.. why is this different?
Last time when I lost weight through Lighter Life, one "friend" said absolutely nothing. When the subject came up, she said "see, I never notice or pay attention to if a friend is over weight , I take them as they are..." frankly ,I thought it was because she was so self absorbed, paying attention to me was not on agenda. I clearly looked better... I complemented on her hair, lipstick.. why is this different?
