Help with a decision please

[StephieAck]

Hi guys
Im leaving this kind of late in the day now but I would like some advice.
I am going to see my GP in the morning to ask him to do my blood checks ready for seeing Mr Li in the next month or so (dont normally get a huge amount of warning for appointments) and I am also asking him to refer me to an infertility clinic to help us to get ready to try for a family. I wouldnt usually do that but I have a lonnnnnnnnnnng history with infertility and weight loss doesnt seem to have helped to change my fertility issue, so to stop us spending more years struggling I am going to go back and get help right off the bat.
The advice I need is who to ask my GP to refer me to.
Do I go back to my previous clinic, the one that know me inside and out and just couldnt help me any more simply because my weight was being blamed for everything, so until I could lose the weight they could no longer help me...so do I go back to them hoping that we can pick up where we left off in 2008 or do I ask to be referred to a new hospital if there is more of a choice now. There is a hospital called Liverpool Womens Hospital that I have heard awesome things about, so do I ask to go there and start from scratch, from the very beginning with fresh 'eyes' so to speak?
I cant decide...my old doctor knows me (I called her secretary the other day and she even remembered me!!! lol) and maybe we can start off from where we were, but will she treat me in the same old way?
I dont know what to decide...any advice?
Steph xx

 

[salski]

Hi Steph - if I were you I would feel more comfortable going with the people who knew my history and knew how much I had done to lose weight to be able to get pregnant.
I always assumed I would be going back to my original hospital post op for IUI or IVF, it never occured to me to change.
You need to ask yourself why you want to change and make a decision based on that.
Not much help - but it really is your choice hun x

 

[StephieAck]

Thanks Sally xx
I always planned to go back to Mrs Langton if the need was there after weight loss, so I was planning that but then people said about Liverpool Womens being awesome and I as all confused.
Was just chatting to hubby on the phone (he is in work) and he said he would prefer us to give Mrs Langton another chance, so I think that is what Ill do.
The thing that always annoyed me with Mrs Langton was that I felt fobbed off in the later years, she couldnt tell me why I was bleeding constantly and no treatment would stop it, so I was left to bleed, I would go for years without bleeding and nothing would help, so I was left to go years without bleeding...I was always the extremes. We did try ovarian drilling...with no effect...we did a few months of Clomid...with no effect and I puzzled them because my PCOS wasnt reacting to anything and I felt that they just fobbed me off and used my weight as an excuse. I would have one doctor saying "I guarantee that if you lose a few stone you will get pregnant naturally" and Mrs Langton's prediction was that after 3-4st loss I would have my periods 'click in' and more than likely be caught pregnant naturally. I got sick of hearing it, but I took them at their word and we decided that until I lost the weight we wouldnt see each other again, but I could go back if I needed help, its now been so long that I need a fresh referral. Now, I am quite glad that I can go back to them and kind of say "HA...its wasnt just the weight!!!" but I really cant blame them for blaming the weight, it was the one obvious thing that wasnt changing. So maybe I just need to give them a chance to help the new me.
So, I am going to go back to Mrs Langton and hope that we can sort something out, she does know me well, so perhaps she is best qualified to treat me. We can only try I guess.
Thanks.
Steph xx

 

[Linski]

Aw Steph I wish you all the luck in the world with this. If anything she should understand how important this is to you more than ever. They said weight loss would help and you have lost the weight and you should be so proud of yourself, I am sure you are more confident now in challenging them and pushing for her to pick up where she left off. I pray this all works out for you.

One thing I would do is ask my GP what his thoughts were really. I know hubby prefers you to go back to Mrs Langton but your GP should know success rate etc for the new hostpital. Sorry if I am confusing you mind set now but it wont hurt to ask as sometimes a fresh approach may be better. Your doctor could always include in your referral details of what treatment you have had.

Oh dear I feel a bit bad now suggesting this but sometimes other opinions help.

Post and let us know how your appointment tomorrow goes. Got everything crossed for you steph. How is Joseph James doing?

Linski xxx

 

[StephieAck]

Thank you xx I will ask the GP what his opinion is and go from there.
Joseph is brilliant thanks, he is a very good baby, sleeps from feed to feed with no fussing.
Here he is with me, he was starting to get hungry at that point so he looks like he is going for my hand lol

Im going to see him tomorrow morning...cant wait hehe
Steph xx

 

[Linski]

He's a cracker Steph - bless him. Good luck tomorrow;

Lin x

 

[lisa x]

Steph...you may find they will bluff you off again with .."try for 6 months"without treatment ..before they start any drug regime....
I cant advise you hun...go with your gut feeling...I wish you all the best hun

 

[dawny]

gorgeous pic steph, suits you hun.
i honestly think by the mere fact that your asking, you dont have that much faith in your past clinic, and if you have heard good things about the new one, i think if they had a record from your gp, and you could fill in the gaps, its like fresh eyes, theyre not gonna hold onto past ideas if you get what i mean. they arnt gonna b biased is what im trying to say. but ultimately at the end of the day it is your decision, go with your instincts hun, dont go somewhere just to be loyal. i hope that you might be able to do it on your own, it is still early days yet isnt it, things have only just started to kick in if you know what i mean. but it wont do any harm to start now will it. lots of hugs xx

 

[StephieAck]

Thanks guys xx
I would love to think that I could get pregnant without assistance but I just dont think its possible, I just have a feeling that if I do ever get pregnant then I will need at least a little bit of help.
I think what Ill do is go back to Mrs Langton and see what she says, if Im not happy with her plan then I will transfer, I did mention it once before and she said that no other doctor can do more than she already could. We shall soon see I guess. I just dont believe that Im ever going to become pregnant without help, they said that my body would 'kick in' after just a few stones loss, Im over 9st down since they last saw me and nothing has changed. I guess we will see.
The biggest point of tomorrow is to arrange to have my bloods checked so that I can see whether Im healthy enough to start trying again once I get Mr Li's blessing.
Thanks guys xx
Steph xx

 

[dawny]

steph hun, i thought things were starting to kick in, with periods, ovulating pains etc, what is it thats made u think you arnt gonna do it on ur own hun. big hugs xx

 

[angie790]

Hi Steph,

This is a hard one isn't it? Have a good chat with your GP & see what he recommends; I think I would be tempted to try you old Dr, give it say six months or a year, but I would also be drawn to the Liverpool Womens Hospital if its reputation is preceding itself. I suppose an important question is, could you transfer to the new place if you don't get any luck with Mrs Langdon? I know how you feel though, I have had terrible gynae problems almost since puberty, including 9 miscarriages in the last 5 years (which also didn't help with the weight gain!). I never wanted my daughter to be an only child, but I gave up thinking about it when I started my PhD...I've decided I'm going to go back to my Dr when I have 6 months left of study, otherwise I'm just going to run out of time. I should have lost most of my excess weight by then too, so at least the obesity can't be blamed if I miscarry again. I hope your bloods are ok & your Dr is happy to refer you xxx

 

[BandyEmm]

heya hun, just wanted to say good luck with the appointment. I hope they will help you. Although they may suggest waiting for anything up to 18 mths for your body to adjust from the weight you have fantastically lost. Im sure it will happen for you hun all naturally, Weight has a beig effect on our bodies maybe more than we know, And when that weight has gone it takes a while for our bodies to catch up again.

massive hugs and bags full of luck xxx

 

[sugga]

Wishing you the best of luck with your Drs appointment tomorrow and hope one day soon you will receive the news you are desperate to hear. Joseph James is a beautiful baby, adorable. You look so at home holding him. Praying your time will soon come round. xxxx

 

[Amrac1]

Wow that is a tough choice. Go with your gut instinct. Throughout my 16 years of infertility mty criteria for any decision was firstly does it feel right. Then if I dont make this decision will I regret it (i.e. if you change hospitals and dont get pregnant will you always think 'what if' and finally what is my plan if this decision doesnt go my way (i.e if clomid doesnt work will I go for IVF etc).
Good luck in your decision. By the way nothing worked for us but we now have 4 wonderful adopted children and about to apply for number 5!
xxxxxxxxxxx

 

[salski]

Hiya hun - how did you get on with the bloods etc? What did your GP think? Have you made a choice on where you want referring to? x

 

[StephieAck]

Well I saw my GP. He is lovely, he called the nurses and asked them to do the blood tests there and then and they must have said no because he left the room and he soon came back and said they would do it today and they did, cool, my old GP would never do that.
Anyway, I asked him to send me back to Mrs Langton, we want to give her a chance first, we do know that we can change hospitals if we arent getting the help we need. As I am new to my GP my notes are still mainly in paper form, so he is sorting out the referral, but he has to look it all up first. If I hear nothing within eight weeks or so Ill get back in touch with him about it.
I did think that maybe something was changing, for two months I got totally hormonal and then had a period, then this month I had none of the hormonal stuff and had a period early, it wasnt even more than a tiny bit, so Im taking it that my body is just going to mess up again, its seeming to do what it always does.
I hope that I am proven wrong in all of this, I would just love fate to shut me up and get me pregnant without help.
Steph xx

 

[dawny]

hi

hi hun, it will probably take a few months to settle down into a routine, its a bit like when we first start our periods, we dont instantly have a proper cycle, it takes a while for everything to settle into a proper cycle, so that could be why your not hormonal at the moment, i think it took me about 6-8 months to be regular, and even then i wasnt dead on 28 days. by the time you get to see you mrs langden(?), you might well be settling down. either way you will get sorted one way or another. how is mr stephie now, is he feeling a bit better. big hugs xxx

 

[StephieAck]

Well Im hoping that in the following months, because I will be trying to maintain my weight and no major changes will be happening, Im hoping that my body will finally do what it is supposed to do and then I wont need Mrs Langtons help...thats the hope and I just have to stay relaxed. When/if the time comes for treatments to start then I will get super serious about it, but for now I am holding on to my relaxation.
Hubby is good thanks, he is doing fantastically with food and is treating himself as though he is diabetic, just in case.
Steph xx


HUBBY WITH JOSEPH...

 

[dawny]

aw steph, thats a lovely pic of hubby n joseph, its funny, but you both really look 'suited' to it. im glad your staying relaxed about it all, cos that will help your body to sort itself out. when will you get your results from your blood tests.

 

[StephieAck]

They didnt say but I will call them in a week and see if they are back.
Steph xx