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it only takes one
- Thread starter pandora
- Start date
Francesca1973
New Member
Well girls
I didn't have the by pass however I had the balloon procedure.
How I see it is we have to do what makes us happy people don't understand and they can't ever understand what it's like to be FAT unless they are!!
I am 38 I don't wanna go out with friends because of how I look and feel I don't do pool party's because of my weight in short I have missed out on a lot .
my last straw was when I went to a movie with my hubby and the fricken seats got smaller. Lol
I don't listen to negative people, I tried on my own it didn't work so I needed a little help nobody's business unless they r in your skin they won't get the fact that we aren't living now anyway so we take the risk so that we can live!
I am 2 weeks in I feel great I feel skinny already lol I have lost 24 pounds already and I'm glad I made the decision, and I'm sure all will workout for u girls as well I will bet on it!
I didn't have the by pass however I had the balloon procedure.
How I see it is we have to do what makes us happy people don't understand and they can't ever understand what it's like to be FAT unless they are!!
I am 38 I don't wanna go out with friends because of how I look and feel I don't do pool party's because of my weight in short I have missed out on a lot .
my last straw was when I went to a movie with my hubby and the fricken seats got smaller. Lol
I don't listen to negative people, I tried on my own it didn't work so I needed a little help nobody's business unless they r in your skin they won't get the fact that we aren't living now anyway so we take the risk so that we can live!
I am 2 weeks in I feel great I feel skinny already lol I have lost 24 pounds already and I'm glad I made the decision, and I'm sure all will workout for u girls as well I will bet on it!
My older sister told me I was being selfish by putting my life at risk having WLS and I should stop to think of my kids!! She also told me I should be ashamed of myself for getting to the size where I needed to consider WLS as an option!!
Funnily enough, we no longer speak!
Funnily enough, we no longer speak!
TwinkleTwinkle
A Very Happy Bunny
I am not surprised, Sam .. this is precisely why I have chosen to tell just my very immediate family ie; hubby & children. I do not want to end up having to defend a decision which is essentially no one else's business. I hate confrontation too so would have been really upset if anyone decided they had the right to judge me & I lost their friendship, if it can be avoided. It may be a bit cowardly but hey ho, no one is being hurt by it. Hope you do eventually get your relationship with your sister back on track xxx
flowerofshona
New Member
Im not suprised Sam ((((((((hug)))))))))).
I lost my sister to cancer and she fought all her life with weight, im sure she would be behind me all the way and prob have gone for it herself, my brother does not think i will go through wth the op and thats all the family i have except hubby so i think myself blessed but if anyone has a problem with me having this done they can go suck lemons on the motorway !!!!!!!!!!!
I lost my sister to cancer and she fought all her life with weight, im sure she would be behind me all the way and prob have gone for it herself, my brother does not think i will go through wth the op and thats all the family i have except hubby so i think myself blessed but if anyone has a problem with me having this done they can go suck lemons on the motorway !!!!!!!!!!!
Francesca1973
New Member
You know what I have z friend who's mother passed away because of obesity, and while she was alive she had no quality of life she went from table to chair to couch and **** happens we all gain weight and lose our way nothing to be ashamed of you need to tell everyone NOTHING. I told only my mom and my best friend my son and husband and they are all very supportive, however if I had told purrs they would have something to say because people are HATERS. There is no reason they shouldn't want you to be thin and healthy and happy other than they like to see you down. If they weren't jealous they wouldn't be so negative because we risk our lives everytime we get in our cars everyday!!!!! So ignore the haters!!!!
honeykiss
Member
My sister wasn't anti WLS but agin like the previous poster she knew someone who died two years post op through liver failure, whethert this was caused by the WLS or not she does not know.
We did not talk about it too much but after the op she came and satyed with me for ten days, did all the cleaning and housework, made my OH meals for him and was a godsend as I recovered. When we were alone she told me the truth, she was scared something awful was going to happen and expressed it as just a concern about the whole WLS scenario.
I have to add my sister is also very obese and she is also in her early 50's, however she told me seeing the changes in my weight and energy levels have spurred her on and although she admits she could never go down the WLS route she has now started a course of xenical prescribed by her GP and is doing well on it.
So although you may get negative comments from people especially family members it probably is though fear of the unknown.
Wendy x
We did not talk about it too much but after the op she came and satyed with me for ten days, did all the cleaning and housework, made my OH meals for him and was a godsend as I recovered. When we were alone she told me the truth, she was scared something awful was going to happen and expressed it as just a concern about the whole WLS scenario.
I have to add my sister is also very obese and she is also in her early 50's, however she told me seeing the changes in my weight and energy levels have spurred her on and although she admits she could never go down the WLS route she has now started a course of xenical prescribed by her GP and is doing well on it.
So although you may get negative comments from people especially family members it probably is though fear of the unknown.
Wendy x
You know what I feel the same. I told a few family and friends I was going for the band and they were great. I was really chuffed they were all behind me.
Then I said the hospital told me bypass was there recommendation so I updated them all but also (probs my own fault) told them that I didn't want bypass. They practically all said 'aye you don't want to do that it's to drastic'. One even said I have been worried that you might be stupid and get it done.
So all in all I only discuss this with the very supportive people I have met on this forum. Only my boyfriend knows that I am still going ahead with the surgery. Although I still don't want bypass and am hoping for the sleeve ;-)
Its a shame I can't talk to those close to me but hey I got all you supporting me and you have too
Then I said the hospital told me bypass was there recommendation so I updated them all but also (probs my own fault) told them that I didn't want bypass. They practically all said 'aye you don't want to do that it's to drastic'. One even said I have been worried that you might be stupid and get it done.
So all in all I only discuss this with the very supportive people I have met on this forum. Only my boyfriend knows that I am still going ahead with the surgery. Although I still don't want bypass and am hoping for the sleeve ;-)
Its a shame I can't talk to those close to me but hey I got all you supporting me and you have too
Caren
Love my sleeve!!
yep, id be lost without this forum, i have nobody at all here at home, thank god we have each other lolYou know what I feel the same. I told a few family and friends I was going for the band and they were great. I was really chuffed they were all behind me.
Then I said the hospital told me bypass was there recommendation so I updated them all but also (probs my own fault) told them that I didn't want bypass. They practically all said 'aye you don't want to do that it's to drastic'. One even said I have been worried that you might be stupid and get it done.
So all in all I only discuss this with the very supportive people I have met on this forum. Only my boyfriend knows that I am still going ahead with the surgery. Although I still don't want bypass and am hoping for the sleeve ;-)
Its a shame I can't talk to those close to me but hey I got all you supporting me and you have too
good luck, and i hope you get your sleeve
xxx
Sharonimo
Sleeve to Bypass
The answer to that is that the risk of dying from obesity (v high BMI above 50) and the associated co-morbidities is higher than the risk of the operation. (I have scientific data to back this up if you want.)
The answer to that is: “Yes I have managed to lose 4 stone with diet and exercise and put it all back on again” …..how many times do you want me to repeat the loop?
Sharonimo
Sleeve to Bypass
Since being referred, I have taken to looking up lots of scientific research which backs up why it is do hard to lose weight through normal diet and exercise and why bariatric surgery is the best solution for patients with very high BMI and co-morbidities.
I won't repost all the links I had pasted into a previous thread , but if you google “Dr Sharma's Obesity Notes” there is a wealth of information there which should go some way to answering questions that friends and family may have.
LET.ME.OUT.OF.THIS.BODY
New Member
This is a massive issue for me to. i am so afraid of the negative reactions i am sure i will get that i have only confided in two very close friends, the first is supportive but feels i dont need the surgery the second although very nice has voiced her oppinion and despite the fact that she has spent most of the last 12 years going to weight watchers with me she thinks i can do it without surgery "WELL NO OBVIOUSLY NOT OR I WOULD'NT STILL BE AT WEIGHT WATCHERS WITH A BMI OF 40". i spoke to the surgeons secretery last week and she told me my surgery is likely to be December or January at the latest and i havent told my husband or my parents. i need to speak to work about needing time off but i dont want them to know. im terrified of people judging me and i am ashamed. everyone who knows me would describe me as confident and outgoing but this whole thing makes me feel so vulnerable. my friends keep telling me i have to talk to my husband but i just know he's going to try and talk me out of this by making me feel guilty. he will say what if it all goes wrong and i leave our 4 year old daughter without a mother - and what can i say to that? x
Sharonimo
Sleeve to Bypass
I have found the most negative people to be those who are just "slightly" overweight, say 3 or 4 stone.
They seem to be peeved that if they were 13 stone overweight like I am they might be offered the "magic" operation that would get them into size 10.
They have not realised that for most bariatric patients reaching size 10 is not the goal, and most of us only lose about 70% to 80% of our "excess" weight.
So if I manage to lose 10 stone out of those 13 stone that I am overweight and end up around 13 or 14 stone I will be likely to be a plump size 16/18 and by no means "svelte" or in the skinny dress sizes .... but will heave reached a weight that is much more HEALTHY for my body.
My experience is the peeps who are only 3 or 4 stone overweight are the most keen to advocate "But Sharon could you not try just *one* more diet?" ...... and think that we are "cheating" by having the operation.
If offends them because they would still have to lose their excess weight by normal diet and exercise (that is if they personally want to).
Sharonimo
Sleeve to Bypass
However, based on all medical research I have read being just "slightly" over weight and dieting / cutting back a bit once a year or so to get back down to your preferred ideal is the much better and healthier way to be.
If someone could have told me when I was 16 years old and weighed 12 stone then to STAY there, and do everything within my power for the next 60+ years to diet back to 12 stone and what the risks would be of reaching 15 stone, 18 stone, 23 stone etc perhaps I might have listened.
If someone could have told me when I was 16 years old and weighed 12 stone then to STAY there, and do everything within my power for the next 60+ years to diet back to 12 stone and what the risks would be of reaching 15 stone, 18 stone, 23 stone etc perhaps I might have listened.
Sharonimo
Sleeve to Bypass
Again, based on the medical research I have read a person who only needs to lose approx 3 stone will only need to cut their calorific requirements (post weight loss) by 10% - 15% to keep their new lower weight.
However, for an ex super morbidly obese person who uses diet and exercise to diet down from 300+ lbs to 150 lbs they homeostatic thermometer will be reduced by over 50%. The ex obese person becomes *more* fuel efficient, and needs less calories than a NEVER obese person of 150 lbs.
For an ex super morbidly obese (over 300 lbs) person who reaches 150 lbs they are likely to need to survive on a new reduced calorie intake, at least 25% or 30% lower than a NEVER obese 150 lb person.
i.e. an ex obese person will have to survive on 1400 calories a day to maintain their new lean size
This is extremely difficult with a football sized stomach and an appetite that was previously used to consuming around 3000 cals per day.
It becomes possible post bypass surgery when the stomach is reduced to the size of an egg cup, and hunger and desire is significantly reduced for post bypass patients to survive on less than 2000 cals a day.
Dr Sharma stated in one of his articles that the average post bypass patient does actually live on only 1400 – 1500 cals a day and due to not being able to eat so much has to make better food choices to get all the protein and nutrients they need within their limited calorie / small stomach budget.
However, for an ex super morbidly obese person who uses diet and exercise to diet down from 300+ lbs to 150 lbs they homeostatic thermometer will be reduced by over 50%. The ex obese person becomes *more* fuel efficient, and needs less calories than a NEVER obese person of 150 lbs.
For an ex super morbidly obese (over 300 lbs) person who reaches 150 lbs they are likely to need to survive on a new reduced calorie intake, at least 25% or 30% lower than a NEVER obese 150 lb person.
i.e. an ex obese person will have to survive on 1400 calories a day to maintain their new lean size
This is extremely difficult with a football sized stomach and an appetite that was previously used to consuming around 3000 cals per day.
It becomes possible post bypass surgery when the stomach is reduced to the size of an egg cup, and hunger and desire is significantly reduced for post bypass patients to survive on less than 2000 cals a day.
Dr Sharma stated in one of his articles that the average post bypass patient does actually live on only 1400 – 1500 cals a day and due to not being able to eat so much has to make better food choices to get all the protein and nutrients they need within their limited calorie / small stomach budget.
Hi all
i my self didnt tell any one as far as family aware it was a hernia opp that i had. I had made my mind up i looked at the risks and the benifits and just went for it. It only takes one comment from someone who knows nothing at all about WLS to deture you from what could be a life saving/changing opp.
Get positive be positive and stay positive
Regards
Turks101
i my self didnt tell any one as far as family aware it was a hernia opp that i had. I had made my mind up i looked at the risks and the benifits and just went for it. It only takes one comment from someone who knows nothing at all about WLS to deture you from what could be a life saving/changing opp.
Get positive be positive and stay positive
Regards
Turks101
