My story so far... (finally got my date!!)

[Bling Babe]

Aww thanks so much ladies! You're all so nice. Some days are definitely worse than others but mostly things are going pretty smooth.
@Bling Babe I wasn't brave enough to do the milk diet! I think i would have failed hard on that one by the end of the second day. I'm on the real food diet so i still get to eat actual food just low calorie, low carb and low sugar.
It's been confirmed for me over the past 4 weeks though that i'm DEFINITELY a savoury girl. When i think about things i really want to eat none of them are sweet. The thing i have struggled most with so far is the buffet food. Pizza especially!! Seeing my nieces and nephews enjoy a pizza makes me kind of sad on the inside. But i figure its something i have to get used to. I'm not going to be able to eat the stuff i used to and they are always going to be able to... but hopefully not eating that stuff means i can get to spend more quality time with them outside of my house. One of the things that made me decide to have the surgery was missing my nieces first birthday party because my sister had it at a park and i was too self conscious and worried about having to walk far to go. Now that same niece is 4 and i'm really hoping i don't have to miss anymore of her birthdays!
That's the great thing about this site i think. I know from reading some of the diaries on here that the common feeling for people that are overweight is the feeling of isolation. We tend to hide ourselves away... feel alone... because we don't expect that anyone else understands. But everyone on here understands. We all relate to each other if we're 5 stone overweight or 15 stone overweight so many of us have had the same feelings and experiences. It's great because it means we can support each other during our sad times and celebrate each others victories

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

I hope you all have an amazing one, you all definitely deserve it Xx

Aw I see, I forget there is other options because at L and D we don’t get a choice, unfortunately it’s milk diet or nothing as far as I’m aware, you’ve still done incredible well and your so well motivated, I’ve no doubt you will be enjoying many family birthdays in the future xx

 

[_Victoria_]

You are so right.
I always tell people I like my own company. But the truth is I get overwhelmed with all the stress my brain puts me through just to go out with people.
Will I have to walk far?
Will I fit in the chairs?
Will people stare at me?
Will people laugh at me?
Etc etc
Isolation is easier to cope with for me. I really don’t think others get it.
Using this site has helped me realise I am not alone if I choose not to be.
Happy new year x

EXACTLY THIS!!
I've lost friends because i would always cancel plans with them or even refuse to make them. They don't understand the insecurities. And people do stare. Some adults are still so cruel. You would think as we get older we would understand that everyone has their own struggles and wouldn't choose to judge them for it.
I remember one of the few times more recently that i did actually venture outside of my house... It was my aunts 60th birthday party so i felt more comfortable going there because its just my family. I knew i wouldn't be judged there.. So i got dressed up and i thought i looked as okay as i can look.. i actually felt kind of excited. Then on the car journey on the way there we stopped at some traffic lights and i caught the eye of the person in the car next to us and they actually laughed at me and then to make it even worse, they nudged the person next to them to look at me and that person laughed too.. i was crushed, my night was ruined, i kept it to myself and didn't tell anyone about it but i haven't ever forgot it. I literally cried myself to sleep for 2 weeks and i haven't been to a family party since..
People say that you shouldn't care what other people think but it's much easier said than done. Each little thing like that chips and chips away at the little confidence you have which makes everything else a little harder to achieve. I suppose getting surgery and deciding to try and take some control of our weight and of our lives is how we fight back against all of that. It's definitely given me more hope anyway and that's always a good thing!

 

[_Victoria_]

Hi Victoria
Well done on sticking to the diet all over Christmas! I am also scheduled for surgery in January, thankfully I only have to do the LRD for 2 weeks, so started Saturday, but the Coventry team do milk and yoghurt only...its not fun!
I am having a sleeve on 13th, what surgery will you be having?

Oh nice!! Are you excited? The 13th is really close to my date so we'll have to keep in touch and share our progress.
It sucks you have to do the milk diet i really don't think i could have done that for any amount of time. I felt sick after one day of it!
I'm hoping to get the bypass but they told me if they have too much trouble moving stuff around then they will change that to the sleeve. So i won't know what i've had until i wake up. I really hope they can do the bypass though 'cause its the one my mind has been set on since the beginning. I think it's the one that will benefit me the most short and long term.

 

[_Victoria_]

Thanks so much @Bling Babe there's 5 different diets to chose from where i'm having my op. I'm lucky i get to do the real food one because it is actually more than enough to last you through the day without really feeling hungry at all which makes it easier to stick to i think.

I weighed myself today and i'm down 12kg total now!! ONE MORE TO GO!! That should be doable over the next 2 weeks so i'm a little less worried than i was before. I'm so shocked that i've been able to lose that much in just a month. It gives me hope for the future for sure. I just hope my surgeon thinks its enough on the day! Which is just less than two weeks away now soon i'll be in the single digits. I can hardly believe it still! lol

 

[Emma1504]

EXACTLY THIS!!
I've lost friends because i would always cancel plans with them or even refuse to make them. They don't understand the insecurities. And people do stare. Some adults are still so cruel. You would think as we get older we would understand that everyone has their own struggles and wouldn't choose to judge them for it.
I remember one of the few times more recently that i did actually venture outside of my house... It was my aunts 60th birthday party so i felt more comfortable going there because its just my family. I knew i wouldn't be judged there.. So i got dressed up and i thought i looked as okay as i can look.. i actually felt kind of excited. Then on the car journey on the way there we stopped at some traffic lights and i caught the eye of the person in the car next to us and they actually laughed at me and then to make it even worse, they nudged the person next to them to look at me and that person laughed too.. i was crushed, my night was ruined, i kept it to myself and didn't tell anyone about it but i haven't ever forgot it. I literally cried myself to sleep for 2 weeks and i haven't been to a family party since..
People say that you shouldn't care what other people think but it's much easier said than done. Each little thing like that chips and chips away at the little confidence you have which makes everything else a little harder to achieve. I suppose getting surgery and deciding to try and take some control of our weight and of our lives is how we fight back against all of that. It's definitely given me more hope anyway and that's always a good thing!

It hard to forget stuff like that when we are the way we are.
This year for my birthday I didn’t want to do anything. My dad got really upset & I ended up doing something because I didn’t like upsetting him. But the truth be known I hated every minute.
Being in the limelight even with family is horrible. But how do you explain that to the people you love.
My earliest memory of feeling this way was when I was 14yrs. A boy I really liked made a comment about how fat I had got over the summer holidays. It still stops me in my tracks now after all these years.
But we are taking control like you said so we will have the last laugh!!!

 

[Astria]

Well done Victoria on the weight loss knew you could do it ..... go girl lol xx

 

[mushof]

Oh nice!! Are you excited? The 13th is really close to my date so we'll have to keep in touch and share our progress.
It sucks you have to do the milk diet i really don't think i could have done that for any amount of time. I felt sick after one day of it!
I'm hoping to get the bypass but they told me if they have too much trouble moving stuff around then they will change that to the sleeve. So i won't know what i've had until i wake up. I really hope they can do the bypass though 'cause its the one my mind has been set on since the beginning. I think it's the one that will benefit me the most short and long term.

I am excited but also very nervous!! Yes the milk and yoghurt diet is awful but it is a means to an end and I figure they have reasons for using it so it's best to just go with it! Also helps that I am down almost 4kg in a few days!
Yes it would be good to stay in touch and have someone at pretty much the same stage!
Hope you get the bypass if that's what you want!
Have you heard today about NHS cancelling non urgent operations in January? I am really hoping it doesn't affect me!!

 

[Lottiewishes]

Hunny you have done so well...only days to go xxxx

 

[_Victoria_]

Thanks for all the support ladies you're all as awesome as ever!! I had some depressing news on friday though... My surgery got cancelled They said they're gonna call me again in a few days with a new date and said that i should stay on my pre op diet so i don't think it will be too far away... but definitely not a week away anymore I've been pretty down the last few days. I felt like i got so close and now i feel so far away again but i guess i will feel better when i know my new date.

 

[Emma1504]

Oh no
Poor you
Try and keep your chin up. You are so nearly there & I believe in you. Keep you head in the game and focus. You can do it.

 

[mushof]

You poor thing i am so sorry to hear that. It is horrible because you have to prepare yourself so much psychologically!
I hope you're right and it's only a couple of days later than your original date.
Like Emma said just keep your head in the game...you can do it! Xx

 

[Lottiewishes]

Awww hunny you poor thing I am so sorry. Hope you don't have to wait long my lovely. I would be down too. Xxx

 

[Laaux]

Thanks for all the support ladies you're all as awesome as ever!! I had some depressing news on friday though... My surgery got cancelled They said they're gonna call me again in a few days with a new date and said that i should stay on my pre op diet so i don't think it will be too far away... but definitely not a week away anymore I've been pretty down the last few days. I felt like i got so close and now i feel so far away again but i guess i will feel better when i know my new date.

I’m sorry to hear that. Keep going, you’ve got this! I’m sure your new date won’t be too far away xx

 

[Maria61]

Thanks for all the support ladies you're all as awesome as ever!! I had some depressing news on friday though... My surgery got cancelled They said they're gonna call me again in a few days with a new date and said that i should stay on my pre op diet so i don't think it will be too far away... but definitely not a week away anymore I've been pretty down the last few days. I felt like i got so close and now i feel so far away again but i guess i will feel better when i know my new date.

So very sorry but hope it won’t be too long xx

 

[Missyme]

Thanks for all the support ladies you're all as awesome as ever!! I had some depressing news on friday though... My surgery got cancelled They said they're gonna call me again in a few days with a new date and said that i should stay on my pre op diet so i don't think it will be too far away... but definitely not a week away anymore I've been pretty down the last few days. I felt like i got so close and now i feel so far away again but i guess i will feel better when i know my new date.

That’s pants! Hope the wait isn’t too long!

 

[Astria]

I had mine cancelled first time too it was 10 days later I was in getting it done. Stay strong your so close to your new life xx

 

[_Victoria_]

Thanks for all the kind words, support and encouragement everyone I'm happy to report that i got my new date!!
It's not too far away either January 24th. They've changed the hospital i'm having it at too. Spire Parkway in Solihull which is a private hospital where i've heard its likely i'll have my own private room. That might be worth the extra 9 days wait.
I've also lost more than the target weight loss for my pre op diet too. I needed to lose at least 13kg and so far i have lost 15kg and when i spoke to the lady that gave me my date she said if i just maintained the weight i was at my pre op assessment i should be fine. So that makes me feel even better because I'm already 8kg lower than that hopefully it doesn't get cancelled again now and it's smooth sailing until my surgery.. and hopefully not TOO rough after. lol

 

[Sunshine99]

Hi @_Victoria_

Sorry that your initial date got cancelled

(happened to me too, on the day that I arrived...and waited from 7am til 2pm...to be told theres no bed available)

It is annoying, But, unfortunately these things happen.

But, Congratulations on receiving your new date. Bet your getting so excited...but, a bit nervous too. It'l be the start of a new & exciting... healthier you.

My social anxiety has improved loads since I had my op...And, I'm only 4 months out.
I too lost friends...due to not wanting to go out...or make plans. And , the ones who did stick around....where negative people in my life....One even openly admitted she hangs out with uglier people than her...to make her self stand out!
(Which I suspected of her anyhow...it was no surprise to me....just a surprise she openly admitted it!)
People can be so cruel....And, it does hurt...especially when your not mentally strong enough to deal with crap like that...because you have more important issues to deal with ...than their rudeness!

I'm tryng to be a more sociable person these days. Ok...i don't have a wide circle of friends....due to illness/obesity ....And, I'm not desperately after friendships either. But...I am trying to get out and socialise around fun...positive people more, And if I make a couple of really good friends along the way...then so be it. Otherwise...im happy been a loner.
(I do have 2 really good friends)

I was constantly bullied at school too, for been 'different' . Yes I was bullied for my weight...but, I suspect it was more than that...If it wasn't my weight issue...im pretty sure they would have found something else.
I left school early....got no GCSE's. So it did ruin my education. But, trying to do my best now. Going to do GCSE English in September.

I really ...really wish you every success with your surgery! Look forwards to reading your posts.

Toni

 

[slimkim]

Thanks for all the kind words, support and encouragement everyone I'm happy to report that i got my new date!!
It's not too far away either January 24th. They've changed the hospital i'm having it at too. Spire Parkway in Solihull which is a private hospital where i've heard its likely i'll have my own private room. That might be worth the extra 9 days wait.
I've also lost more than the target weight loss for my pre op diet too. I needed to lose at least 13kg and so far i have lost 15kg and when i spoke to the lady that gave me my date she said if i just maintained the weight i was at my pre op assessment i should be fine. So that makes me feel even better because I'm already 8kg lower than that hopefully it doesn't get cancelled again now and it's smooth sailing until my surgery.. and hopefully not TOO rough after. lol

Congratulations on getting your new date! How exciting!!! Keep us updated on how things are going along the way.

A private room will be great, fingers crossed you get one. Are you going to have to stay overnight? Will anyone go with you and stay nearby?

 

[Bling Babe]

Congratulations on getting your new date! How exciting!!! Keep us updated on how things are going along the way.

A private room will be great, fingers crossed you get one. Are you going to have to stay overnight? Will anyone go with you and stay nearby?

Hiya I’m just catching up with a few alerts, really pleased to read you now have another date and an added bonus of a private hospital/room too. Good luck xxx