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Shocked by the repsonse :(
- Thread starter roxyroo
- Start date
Angela1310
Member
Good idea, your mother really wants what is best for you and it may put her mind at rest. My own mother was very worried, tried hard not to voice her concerns but I could see it on her face. There was a time when the risks of surgery was very high and I think it is natural for mothers to worry about surgery. If it was your child going in for surgery you would be worried regardless of what it was for. The more informed your mother is the more positive she will be in the outcome.
Its funny really everyone thinks I have been incredibly brave having this operation
I have cards from my colleagues at work saying how proud they are of me. My nieces are all excited about the new Slimmer Auntie they will gain lol. Maybe I am just lucky the people round me are so positive about all.
Good Luck and I really hope once your mother has been enlightened she will give you support and comfort! She does want what is best for you, stay positive! x
Its funny really everyone thinks I have been incredibly brave having this operation
I have cards from my colleagues at work saying how proud they are of me. My nieces are all excited about the new Slimmer Auntie they will gain lol. Maybe I am just lucky the people round me are so positive about all.Good Luck and I really hope once your mother has been enlightened she will give you support and comfort! She does want what is best for you, stay positive! x
My mum was a bit aprehensive too and thought that if i'd stuck to the (million) diets I started over the years I wouldn't need surgery. But I took her to a couple of consultations and she asked a fair few questions (some made me cringe esp when she asked if I could have children following surgery - she likes jumping the gun does my mother) and now she's 100% behind me.
It is often a shock to our loved ones, but they come round eventually
xxx
Fuffs
Shrinking Big Brummie
My partner first said he would prefer a large partner and mother to his son, than a dead one. That hurt me a lot.
But as he watched me work so hard to lose weight pre op, he decided that he could see that it would help me and what it would mean to me. He was and is an amazing support. My mom was my biggest support and pushed me to do it, as she could see that I was very unhappy.
Sometimes actions speak louder than words in convincing those around us.
But as he watched me work so hard to lose weight pre op, he decided that he could see that it would help me and what it would mean to me. He was and is an amazing support. My mom was my biggest support and pushed me to do it, as she could see that I was very unhappy.
Sometimes actions speak louder than words in convincing those around us.
angiemason
New Member
good luck on weds and I hope she will see it really is the best thing for you xx
I'm sorry your mum wasn't as understanding as you expected. I went thru something similar, except, I was using a "hypothetical" situation with my mum. She didn't take it well either and was quite judgmental about it. So, I'm not going to tell her that i am definitely going through with wls. Only my husband knows. Everyone will worry about me and voice their opinions and may cause me to doubt. My husband is very supportive and I am happy and confident in my decision. Good luck!
embrace1204
New Member
my mum doesn't want me to have the surgery but i'm having it. It's my life and I've had enough of feeling paranoid due to my weight, I disgust myself so it beggars belief why she thinks I'm ok. I have a BMI of 48 so i'm not kidding myself lol. Ultimately it's your life, and as soon as they know you're awake from the anaesthetic and all is ok they'll come round.
I do wonder if it's jealousy on my mum's part because i've faced discouragement whenever i've been at slimming world/rosemary conley etc.....it's your life, live it how you want to
I do wonder if it's jealousy on my mum's part because i've faced discouragement whenever i've been at slimming world/rosemary conley etc.....it's your life, live it how you want to
ThinnerJemima
Here all the time.....
My husband was full of impending doom that I would have problems or die when I had the band, now that I did have problems and had to have another procedure and several emergency visits, the doom that he dishes out has stepped up to a new level.
I am upgrading to a bypass and going to have some skin removal done. My current plan is to not even tell him. I don't need the stress of the pre-op lectures.
What has my life come to but if it works for me, then all good. Can't imagine in reality land that any other wives willbe doing this !!
I am upgrading to a bypass and going to have some skin removal done. My current plan is to not even tell him. I don't need the stress of the pre-op lectures.
What has my life come to
but if it works for me, then all good. Can't imagine in reality land that any other wives willbe doing this !!
embrace1204
New Member
do what's best for you Jemima, he may be feeling a bit insecure but that's not really your issue. Harsh but true!
ThinnerJemima
Here all the time.....
I did have a moment about 18 years ago when I had to have my heart restarted, so vaguely I used to see his point. Time moves on, I trust my surgeon more with my life than I would my husband, and it's very rare to die on the table these days if you don't have pre-existing conditions etc.
Every so often he stays with his elderly Mum, the current plan is that my next surgery (either bypass or skin) will coincide with this. I'll just ask him to collect the car from the hospital, and me if he remembers
This works for me, he knows that both of these will be coming at some point so it's not coming out of the blue. Why stress him out, and hence increase my stress. I didn't take him last time, but he did come to my room after I had gone to theatre.
If only everyone could see the light and just offer support when a decision is being made
Every so often he stays with his elderly Mum, the current plan is that my next surgery (either bypass or skin) will coincide with this. I'll just ask him to collect the car from the hospital, and me if he remembers
This works for me, he knows that both of these will be coming at some point so it's not coming out of the blue. Why stress him out, and hence increase my stress. I didn't take him last time, but he did come to my room after I had gone to theatre.
If only everyone could see the light and just offer support when a decision is being made
