so my brother is here

[cherry]

and we ve come on to the subject of my op, and he s just said to me ' are you stupid kel, asking for a op you dont need' your testing fate there :cry::cry: im all ready paranoid im gonna die, but im desperate to lose this weight to, onbviously im gonna go through with it, but it scares me that he s even thinking im gonna die to, im having a wobble now i dont have many but then it makes me think of my babes and leaving them without a mum :cry: the whole point of this op is so im around longer and healthier for them xxxx

 

[zns]

Probably a reaction because all he knows is the horror stories in the press and he wants to protect you. Perhaps show him some research or decent info?

 

[Chuffy_29]

Totally understand about leaving the babes...i think about it constantly to be honest...then i think if i keep going as i am i won't see the youngest (who's 18 months) grow up and get married anyway...still comes hard though. It's ok to have a wobble...i swing wildly every week but feel committed to getting a healthy weight
(ps showed my husband your avatar pic and he thinks your gorgeous! )

 

[Grace]

Grrrrrrrrr Kelly! He's not the one living with the consequences of being overweight, is he? Try not to let his paranoia get to you lovey.
You're doing this for all the right reasons. Hugs xxxx

 

[Bev]

Hi Kell,
I have this type of reaction from my hubby.
It's borne out of fear for us...
If you feel anxious.... you have time to explore how you are feeling...
I think families don't want to see us put ourselves through it... I believe it is only us that can understand how we feel in all honesty and as far as I'm concerned, I have to go through with it...
But I have explored myself long and hard to arrive at the decision. Thinking of you precious and hoping you feel easier about things very soon, it is difficult with families and they mean well, but it can be so hard to discuss...
Loads of love and hugs Kell, always here for you xxxx

 

[J-Mo]

Kelly, he obviously loves you & will not see you as being overweight so thinks you don't need the op! My kids understand that I want this but repeatedly say "but mam there's nothing wrong with you, you're not fat"!!!!

Obviously our BMI's say different. Hang in there & look at magazines of the gorgeous lasses modelling all them lovely clothes. That's what I do when I have a 'wobble'.

Take care Kelly & it must be lovely to have brother that cares so much for you. I have a sister I don't speak to, I have no other real family other than my dad & my boys..

 

[cherry]

thanks everyone i feel reallllllllly scared now ha tomorrow ill think differently im sure ............im petrified if i die in this op ... god hark at me hey..... ill be ok tomorrow xx

thanks sweetpea, always nice to get compliments ha x

 

[cherry]

thanks j mo.... i cant find your thanks button haha....... its so scary but i KNOW i need this op, im deseratly unhappy this size, and your right he said to me, but your not that big, errr yeh ok.... he just keeps banging on about risking it as im choosing to have a op... xx

 

[dottychic]

Kelly, Im sure you have thought of every reason there is NOT to have this op, then you start thinking of the reasons there is to have it, Im sure you will agree there are many many more reasons to have it that not to! We all know the risks and I know for me they are worth taking. You are lucky to have a brother who cares for you, but you are the one living with it every day. Its your decision and no one elses no matter how well meaning they may be (HUGS) X

 

[Dell]

Kel, I admit I sobbed ALL afternoon yesterday after my pre op assessment because it now feels VERY REAL. I have waited 2.5 years for my date, and have been nothing but excited and "bring it on", but yesterday all that excitement was gone and I told my husband I was going to write him and my 3 kids a note each and plan the music for my funeral what an idiot!!??

He is great at bringing me back down to earth and for researching things to the Nth degree so he reassured me hugely.

There are LOADS of reasons we will survive the op, there are so few horror stories and we are being treated by specialist teams who deal with this every day.

But its gotta be normal to worry a little surely? I know I feel a lot better today and more positive once more, but its still a niggle and my kids have never had so many cuddles and kisses as they have today!!

 

[zns]

Seriously there is the same risk of dying walking down the road and being hit by a car, it really is very low. x

 

[keeley86]

show him every1s before and after pics on here kel - all the posative stories far out weigh the negative ones! plus think of it like this... if you was having a heart operation to save your life would he tell you not to have that op? no! well the risk is only the same and in the long run it will save your life too as if we deal with the weight now it could add years of healthier life to us where as without it.... being fat gives us lots of other risks and in the end may need that op on our hearts anyway because of all the fat. sorry im rambling lol but thats how i think about it
hope your ok hun... your boys will love the new skinny you because youl have more energy to run about with them and that!

sending big hugs huns xxxxx

 

[Laura b]

awww kel hunny its not nice to see u upset cus ur messages (and there lots of them,lol) are always so cheerful, i have the same fears as u my boys r 7 yrs and 4 months and the thought of leaving them behind upsets me muchly, but like i see it if we lived in fear we would never do nothing, we wouldnt walk out our house incase we got knocked over, we wouldnt go on holiday incase the plane crashed, we wouldnt go to sleep incase we never woke bk up, i keep thinking like that and then i realise o ok laura u aint goin anywhere u b here with ur boys forever seriousily though everytime i close my eyes i pray that ill wake up in the morning cus wen ur asleep u wouldnt know if u didnt wake up, its true wat they say its the ones u leave behind!! but im sure no infact certain that u aint gonna die hunny xxxxxxxxx