St Richards pulled through for me....

[angelwings25]

Well after all my whining and anxiety and lack of sleep since July I had my face rubbed in it yesterday and I got the phonecall from St Richards Hospital in Chichester offering me a date for surgery. I thought I was gonna be sick I really couldn't believe, they caught me so off guard as I was on the phone to my office on my work line. ARGH!!! Anyway, my pre-op is on 6th November and the surgery is 27th November with Mr Slater. So its 4 weeks on Friday, ooooooh errrr!!! Am really excited although its not quite hit me yet. Unfortunately my boyfriend isn't as supportive, he didn't want me to have it originally and we had a bit of a barny last night. Nothing I can do really he'll have to accept it or leave me! He wants me to lose weight the "normal" way and i got so angry with him i defended all and sundry over that comment, stupid pr**k came to mind but i love him and he loves me so maybe we will come through it together. Who knows. All I'm thinking about now is my bright future and the fact that i now have 3 weeks in which to get all my christmas shopping done and arrange everything with work who in this economic crisis have finally decided they want me to use my last weeks holiday as part of the sick leave as i'll be off pretty much for the whole of December. Can't have it all our way eh!? lol. oh well, i got my date thats all that matters. Oh and anyone who is wondering about Mandyl she has been texting me and appears the "blip" which ahs kept her in (she is still in) was she couldn't drink and is very dehydrated so they won't let her go until she starts drinking properly. She is a bit teary but i've given her a pep talk and told her at least she isn't suffering at home alone like she was before xxxxxxxxx

 

[CHUCKY]

fantastic news well done you so exciting and you got the best surgeon.!

 

[Caroline101061]

thats fab news - sure your BF will come round when you have sailed thru the surgery and are losing weight - think its just fear of the surgery thats freaking him out. Tell that Mandy to sip sip sip and keep sipping - drinking is my bugbear but it has to be done.

 

[Fashionably Late]

Congrats! Our op dates are the same day!

 

[Cuppacocoa]

Delighted for you hun and not long to wait either! :happy096: My husband wasn't convinced about the whole op thing either until I took him with me for an appointment with the surgeon. He then heard everything from the horse's mouth so to speak and could ask any questions, he came away feeling much happier about the whole thing.

Best of luck with everything and do keep us posted on your weightloss journey!

Cuppa xx

 

[angelwings25]

Delighted for you hun and not long to wait either! :happy096: My husband wasn't convinced about the whole op thing either until I took him with me for an appointment with the surgeon. He then heard everything from the horse's mouth so to speak and could ask any questions, he came away feeling much happier about the whole thing.

Best of luck with everything and do keep us posted on your weightloss journey!

Cuppa xx

I was thinking that he should come with me on an appointment as his mum took me instead on all previous 4 appts as i don't drive and the next appt is pre-op and my mum is taking me as she wants to know what is going to happen and what to expect etc and i don't really want an entourage of people coming with me as its always so busy but do you think I should have him come so he can see it in the flesh? (no pun intended!)

 

[angelwings25]

Congrats! Our op dates are the same day!

oh god yeah we are !! are you at chichester as well? see you're in northampton so not likely but just wondered as some do come from far afield for the illustrious Mr Slater!! He has some serious rep doesn't he I thought I was having Mr Somers but a shame i'm not really as was looking forward to having him but nevermind Mr Slater will do me proud regardless

 

[Caroline101061]

absolutely take him with you - get him involved. Takes the fear out of it for him,

 

[angelwings25]

thats fab news - sure your BF will come round when you have sailed thru the surgery and are losing weight - think its just fear of the surgery thats freaking him out. Tell that Mandy to sip sip sip and keep sipping - drinking is my bugbear but it has to be done.

Thanks Caroline, i'll let her know I hope he does, i regret never asking him to come to an appointment with me in the past as perhaps the reality of it might make him see sense. xxxx

 

[Cuppacocoa]

I agree with Caroline hun definately take him with you xx

 

[angelwings25]

Even with my mum there as well? its not a big place and the loxwood centre is heaving on fridays so im just thinking i dont want too many people coming?? my mum is coming all the way from South Wales to be there...

 

[Caroline101061]

take him - he is obviously scared and needs medical reassurance.

 

[tubbyspud]

Even with my mum there as well? its not a big place and the loxwood centre is heaving on fridays so im just thinking i dont want too many people coming?? my mum is coming all the way from South Wales to be there...

Congrats on getting your date. I will be thinking of you. The team are fantastic so rest assured you'll be in good hands. Bless your mum for coming down to be with you from south wales. Can i ask do you know why your BF has an issue with you having surgery? Is he scared that you wont come out the other side? Or do you think he may have an issue in the change it will have to your relationship? Have the pair of you met up with anyone that has had the surgery to go through there experience? that might help. xxx

 

[angelwings25]

Congrats on getting your date. I will be thinking of you. The team are fantastic so rest assured you'll be in good hands. Bless your mum for coming down to be with you from south wales. Can i ask do you know why your BF has an issue with you having surgery? Is he scared that you wont come out the other side? Or do you think he may have an issue in the change it will have to your relationship? Have the pair of you met up with anyone that has had the surgery to go through there experience? that might help. xxx

The reason is not a nice one, its offensive tbh. I mentioned in my initial post on here that he wants me to lose weight the "normal" way. I'm on WW at the mo and lost all of 5lbs in 3 months, hardly good going, i have PCOS and just find it near impossible to lose weight unless i live on what i deem as rabbit food for the rest of my life. He doesn't really say anything else about why he doesn't want me to have it, just that he thinks I can do it the normal way and not have to make such a huge sacrifice. It might change us I don't know and he definitely doesn't want me to stay overweight as he see's how i suffer. Thing is and it takes a lot for me to admit to this but he uses my weight against me, like Saturday night i knocked over a full glass of drink on the carpet and it was a complete accident but he got angry and called me a "fat heffa" which upset me then I got angry with him and gave him what for. I told him he behaves like a bully but he says these things then he cuddles me and says he loves my cuddliness my god he is confusing. He is 29 in 5 weeks and i can tell you now he is more like 12 then anything close to 30.

 

[Caroline101061]

Honestly a gastric bypass is not really that huge a sacrifice in the long run. You really really dont miss stuff (well I dont at the mo) and if you do then you can substitute with other things and as you go on, you can have a bit of what you fancy.

Not that its any of my business but if he uses your weight as an insult, he needs a good smack in my opinion - wouldnt let anyone do that to me

 

[angelwings25]

Honestly a gastric bypass is not really that huge a sacrifice in the long run. You really really dont miss stuff (well I dont at the mo) and if you do then you can substitute with other things and as you go on, you can have a bit of what you fancy.

Not that its any of my business but if he uses your weight as an insult, he needs a good smack in my opinion - wouldnt let anyone do that to me

I agree with you Caroline its his perception of it. Yes we are giving up some freedom of choice of what we eat but its this freedom that got me into this state in the first place so i am receiving it gratefully. And believe me I do fight my battles there is no way in hell i'd let him treat me like that and get away with it. I do have a knack for pickin 'em.

 

[swizzlestick]

Hi Angelwings Fantastic news that you have your date *yay*

If it isnt down to you partner being scared for you and it actually sounds like that is not the case, do you think he may say something to upset your surgeon or anything to try and scupper this for you. You are right, he may love you but he is behaving a bit like a child, sounds like he may need a bit of tough love to me .

Ive got to say I would be wary taking anyone with me if they were being horrid about the whole thing, regardless if it is borne out of his own insecurities.

What you need is support right now. I hope he sees sense and gives it to you.

Xx

 

[Caroline101061]

me too - Im sworn off men right now. Need to get me happy and I dont need a man for that. Believe me, age doesnt bring wisdom where men are concerned - Ive got a good few years on you and it doesnt get any easier. With the food thing, you will be so thrilled with your new emerging body that it will outweigh any food that you might fancy - I can only say whats happening to me right now and Ive done the eating thing and now its time for the being slim and healthy thing. You know, your relationship may very well not run the course of your weight loss (dont want to be the harbinger of doom) but there are loads of wonderful things just around the corner to look forward to

 

[angelpie]

fantastic news about your date angelwings. I have the same problem with my male friend. luckily he doesnt live with me so I can tolarate it, but it hurts doesnt it. lol x

 

[tubbyspud]

me too - Im sworn off men right now. Need to get me happy and I dont need a man for that. Believe me, age doesnt bring wisdom where men are concerned - Ive got a good few years on you and it doesnt get any easier. With the food thing, you will be so thrilled with your new emerging body that it will outweigh any food that you might fancy - I can only say whats happening to me right now and Ive done the eating thing and now its time for the being slim and healthy thing. You know, your relationship may very well not run the course of your weight loss (dont want to be the harbinger of doom) but there are loads of wonderful things just around the corner to look forward to

I totally agree, i didnt want a relationship with anyone new before my op because i didnt want that person to change my mind or try too. Then 3 weeks after my op i actually went on the datingsite to remove myself as i didnt want a relationship for at least six months because i knew my mind & confidence would change but as i was deleting my profile a guy i had chatted over a year previous left a message so i chatted to him started a relationship (very brief) he was a complete control freak and do you know what a bully too and because he couldnt control what i was eating he turned very nasty, i ended that no longer was i a doormat this was the end of the old Vic. So 6months on i am so happy started to go out and have fun just checking out the guys that are on offer all beit they are younger than me but oh it feels great to be chatted up lol . xxx