Was it worth it?

[Gerry]

Had a chat with someone I know recently, who had a GB in 2008. Starting weight was 23 stone and size 30. After the op, they got down to 14 stone and size 16.

Now emerges that they 'discovered they could eat what they liked' and are now back up to over 20st again and still rising. They were openly boasting that their portion size was 'back to normal' (ie pre-op portion size) and fish & chips were no problem!

What on earth was the point in having the surgery in the first place? They are trying to claim that the weight now is all 'excess skin' and that they have aproached their GP in order to have it removed.

How on earth is it possible to be able to eat yourself back to that size with such a small pouch after surgery? Has it stretched? Is it something that can happen easily? Do you need willpower not to let it happen?

I'd be utterly devastated if I'd put myself through all that surgery and then ended up almost back where I started. What's the liklihood of it happening? Has anyone here had that happen?

Sorry if it's not very encouraging, but it's something I really want to know about. If it's a frequent happening or just that this person really wasn't trying to help themself (which I think stands to reason anyway...I think they just saw it as a quick way to loose weight rather than dieting).

Any comments welcome.

 

[cazbandy]

It can happen but a person has a choice to carry on working with the tool or cheat it.

I watched a video on you tube yesterday where a patient who had regained after a bypass was having a band put on too....

No surgery has a 100 percent guarantee but hopefully most people learn new habits to keep up the success they have.

 

[jo_ jo]

Its a real big shame that it has gone back on again. Are they eatting rubbish food?I know I wouldnt like to go back to been big again. I am surprised that they have unless something is medically wrong that is

Jo
xx

 

[Gerry]

Nope, no medical problems. Just eating because they could and because it was there. When I spoke to them during their weight loss, they seemed to think it was something to celebrate that they could eat chocolate, fried food and all that sort of stuff.

I think it beggars belief that someone could go through that and then be pleased that they can stuff in packs of crisps and fry ups when there are others who badly want the operation but can't get it and are much more serious about it.

 

[Grace]

Oh my word! After what I have been just been trough, there is NO WAY I am going to sabotage my new pouch!

I am going to take this as a very rare second chance and make it work every inch of the way!

BUT I did speak to someone last year, 4 weeks post by-pass, who was kind of 'boasting' that she could already eat 4 slices of bread at one go!

I came home totally confused: why would you go through that and then just push it as far as you can to go back to 'normal' eating?
I have to admit, I just don't get it.

 

[Chuffy_29]

This is interesting and it's something i worry about..effectively sabotaging myself. I think it's a mind set though i know i would only be having liquids for a couple of weeks then smooth puree for another month and then mashed for another month and then chew chew chew...it's the whole thing about grasping a final chance..i guess you make your own choices about this. I hope it wasn't NHS or people will be even more p****d off about bariatric surgery than they are now!

 

[Caroline101061]

you have to commit to changing your mind as well as your body and you have to decide right from the get go that there are certain foods you can never eat again - well thats what I did. Im not saying Im a saint but I have definitely re-educated my head to not want sweets, biscuits, chocolate any more - have not touched anything like that since before the surgery which was April last year.

You have to decide what you want more - to be healthy and a normal size or to eat rubbish - we cannot do both. I personally get more pleasure from having lost 11 stone than a bar of chocolate ever gave me and I have a wardrobe full of knee length boots that I could only dream about before.

Nothing wrong with the occasional treat now and again as long as you keep it as a treat. My one vice now is Bombay Mix and I very seldom buy it as I know its hard to resist!

 

[cherry]

hi, i would say they ve been constantly eating that little bit more and more on each meal to the point where it has streched the pouch, but god i find it quiet shcoking as they must have gone trough extreme dumping or feelin ill through doing this :-/ this says to me that if someone can put up with that then its quiet clearly a physcological one and rather needs to be adressed with a counsellor or physcatrist and no amounts of surgery will cure this! as they will just strech again and again, very sad case x

 

[phatmomma]

Pre op i was very holier than thou with the ''why do people sabotage by eating the odd pack of crisps, drink alcohol''etc. Post op i discovered i can eat a biscuit or a bit of pudding without dumping! OMG my biggest fear has happened i do not dump! This last week i realised i was buying a pack of egg custards because i fancied the taste not because i was hungry (don't beat me i only ate one) and also go ahead biscuits out the machine at work.. I've realised these have gone from ''oooh a treat'' to a 'do you fancy one'? I'm addressing this and have already decided that there is no more snacking unless it's fruit or protein packed.

I'd say (getting back to the topic) that your friend lost the weight and thought she was invincible and went back to old habits which made her fat in the first place!

We, at the end of the day, are in control of what we eat! We can't blame a 6 stone gain on excess skin...

I hope your friend regains some control of her eating and goes back on the right path for her wls xx

 

[novamay]

:rant2:RANT ALERT!!!! I am the same weight as that person 23+ stones, size 30, and I'd like to think that there's no way on god's green earth if I lost 11 stone that i would be tempted to put it back on... but then again I can't really say that until I'm in that position.

I totally agree with comments that your mind has to be in the 'right place', as the surgery is only a tool to help us lose weight. I would imagine that its quite easy to 'cheat' with the band - all you need to do is, say, melt chocolate - and you youre back to eating high fat/sugar foods all over again - its obvious that you'll put weight on... Its not so much that the band didn't work - it was a case that the person did not work with the band (if that makes any sense!).

I also think that we need to take the time between GP referral and op to try and come to grips with our eating habits and change our ways - I'm trying to do this - and I admit its dammed hard! Sometimes I fail, but I've had some good days where I've dealt with situations without resorting to food.

I hope that I do get referred to a therapist siholog:- even if it adds time to waiting time - I'd appreciate any help to overcome my emotional eating before my op. I'd hate to think that I would jeopardise what is my last chance to prolong my life and make my life less painful and less frustrating.

I'll get off my soap box now and breathe. :soapbox:

 

[Bev]

It's always been so easy to reach for the chocolate and binge on fatty foods... it'll always be there...

I'm doing my utmost right now to try and re educate my eating habits and the family... I am hoping that I never get into the 20 stone region again... it nearly finished me off...

Thanks to the support and education on here, I read more on here than I can take from a book, from my perspective, I see the pouch as a 'new internal organ' that needs to be nurtured and cared for... there are bound to be cases like this... it's inevitable... the mind and cravings are a huge issue... it's such a tough climb back up... there is no way I'm heading up on the scales again!

Thank you for posting Gerry... this is certainly 'food for thought!'

xxx

 

[marky v]

why any person would do that is perplexing, yes they've had the surgery, but after reading thro many posts on here over the last year or so, there are many people who try to see what they can 'squeeze' in their pouch to see their limits, same as the people who try to find their limits for sugar tolerance for dumping....unfortunately as we all no, this over eating malarky is an addiction, an analogy i could use is George Best, rest his soul, he was given a new liver for a 2nd chance but his demons got the better of him, ultimately, he knew drinking again would kill him, but could not help himself, i believe more has to be done re the psychology of losing weight, as already said, WLS is just a tool given to us to help, it is no miracl cure which some people seem to think it is...whether you use the tool to it's full potential is down to you as an individual, thus why i do agree with alot of PCT's criteria of the 12 month weight loss programs before surgery is given, for many i believe this may not even be long enough...my views could be contoversial, i didn't wait 12 months, nor did i have intensive counselling, but i educated myself as to what i could do to benefit my long term weight loss goals, i still eat the odd bit of crap, but i can stop myself now, whereas before it created a cascade effect, i do not have the association with food i once had, i eat cos i have to NOT cos i want to, just my take on it!!

 

[salski]

I kinda understand how easy it can be to put on. The best thing about having WLS is the restriction your feel, eventually (Im 16 months post op and my portions sizes have well increased) your portion sizes do increase, therefore if you carry on eating like you did pre op, you are going to put weight back on. Im still a firm believer that they dont operate on your head, and people go on and on and on about how their head is now screwed on about food and they will never get in that situation again, however this is a life long journey, and if heads are that screwed on now....great - but for some even a bypass or a band isnt enough of a shock.
IF WE WERE ALL PERFECT WE WOULD ALL BE HEALTHY bmi's - just coz you have an op doesnt mean you are now going to be a model human does it?

 

[StephieAck]

I agree with Caroline101061.
I personally decided that I wont have biscuits, chocolate or cakes and I can truly and honestly say that I dont miss them...my body and mind are beyond the habit of eating them now and so are used to it, I never lookd at any of those things and think mmmmmmmm I wish I could have them, in fact I now look at them and think "I cant remember what they taste like and feel like to eat", I realise that I am very lucky in this mindset, but I dont miss them and so I just wont be having them.
Im not white as white...I eat the odd pack of crisps and I have a scoop of vanilla ice cream now and then, but I dont choose them over 'good' foods, so I dont feel bad about them.
I totally repect people that want to have a bit of everything but in moderation, but I just dont feel that way myself, I actually feel empowered by 'denying myself' things, I feel that I am stronger than the food finally and I want to keep this feeling and I know that for me the old cliche saying of nothing tastes as good as being slim feels really does ring true, because no food has ever tasted good enough to overtake this wonderful glow inside of me from being slimmer. I am a fruit fiend now, I make silly noises when I eat a handful of yummy raspberries or blackberries, they truly are my 'vice' and I guard that vice strongly lol
Steph xx

 

[dottychic]

I agree Sal, I lost nearly 10 stone with Slimming World about 10 years ago. Whilst I was loosing weight my SW Teacher was telling me about somebody who lost 10 stone and they put it all back on again. I was absolutely amazed! No way would I EVER put my weight back on it was too hard to loose You guessed it, it all went back on and more besides. I had a depression after my Dad died suddenly and within a year my weight went back.
I will never say never again, I just hope I have the strength to do the right things this time. I will do everything in my power to succeed this time, but like alcohol addiction you have to take it one day at a time. X

 

[ditzeeblonde]

I agree Sal, I lost nearly 10 stone with Slimming World about 10 years ago. Whilst I was loosing weight my SW Teacher was telling me about somebody who lost 10 stone and they put it all back on again. I was absolutely amazed! No way would I EVER put my weight back on it was too hard to loose You guessed it, it all went back on and more besides. I had a depression after my Dad died suddenly and within a year my weight went back.
I will never say never again, I just hope I have the strength to do the right things this time. I will do everything in my power to succeed this time, but like alcohol addiction you have to take it one day at a time. X

I lost 7 stone in 4 months on a vlcd for my wedding... 5 months later when I fell pregnant I started piling it all back on again!!

I also said that I would never let it happen, I loved being slim too much!

I totally agree one day at a time & pray that this will give me the strength to stick with it.... I'm so thankful for this opportunity & would hate to waste it. x

 

[Gerry]

In answer to an earlier reply, yes this was an NHS op, which is what angers me so much, as there are people who really want it and would work at it and wouldn't treat it so lightly. I think initially they looked on it as a quick fix. It just rattles me so much to the point where I just didn't want to listen to anymore of the boasting about being 'back to normal' and 'eating what they liked again' which if past history was anything to go by, was a mega fried breakfast at a local cafe every morning and living on endless take aways, paid for with DLA money because they were 'ill and unable to work'. Having known this person for over 30 years, I can say with certainty that it was accute lazyitis and nothing more which ailed them. It makes me so . There is a lot more to the story, which makes my blood boil but don't want to identify the person concerned. Suffice to say they are very self centred and totally out for all they can get.

[Shuts self in sound proof cupboard to have a good scream at the frustration of it all].

:sigh:

 

[J-Mo]

I feel I need to tell you about a girl I work with. She is onto her 3rd band, yes 3rd! Not because of any problems as such but because she still overeats & actually snapped one. I know this for a fact as she bragged o me about it. She will sit & whinge that she isnt losing weight whilst shovelling a packets of crisps & mars bar in her mouth (thats her mid morning snack).

She is now awaiting a bypass!!! Now I'm sorry but if you've been given 3 bands surely a bypass isnt gonna work either as she'll still overeat!!

 

[Chuffy_29]

These people aren't looking at this as a life changer are they really???? For goodness sake! I think (and this may be controversial!) that if you break a band because you are breaking the "rules" and not putting in the effort then there should be no more NHS funding and certainly not a bypass as a "bonus". So many people work so hard to lose the weight, change their habits and lives and just a few idiots who really don't give a T***!

[Joins Gerry in the sound proof cupboard to finish the rant!]

 

[J-Mo]

Chuffy, I totally agree. It takes me a lot of self control to stop myself ramming the mars bar down her throat!!! Yes, the lass has problems with her weight but we all need to know its down to willpower & our op's are only tools for us to use in our weight loss journeys!