BandedHuns Mad Fat Diary

[BandedHun]

God three days off and im exhausted. GP had perscribed me some strong happy pills so hopefully will life my mood a bit. Had solictors this morning followed by nails and tomorrow... Yep... I've booked it BOTOX . Three areas so I'll post before and after photos too.. Can't wait to try its I just want to lol fresher as I look so tired.

Re tried my wedding dress on yesterday . I'm lost in it. Had another 1.5 inches off the bum and hips. I do feel great in it though. See attached photo.

I've been on massive spend up since finishing. Like literally four pairs of ugg , boots trainers and heeled boots. Jack wills hoodys and PJS and new super dry bottoms all XS size.

I am enjoying my time off and my house is immaculate again which is lovely and I've cooked meals every night again. Weight is still 9st 6 so can't grumble but I do want to put on a bit or at least tone up .

 

[sharon2014]

God three days off and im exhausted. GP had perscribed me some strong happy pills so hopefully will life my mood a bit. Had solictors this morning followed by nails and tomorrow... Yep... I've booked it BOTOX . Three areas so I'll post before and after photos too.. Can't wait to try its I just want to lol fresher as I look so tired. Re tried my wedding dress on yesterday . I'm lost in it. Had another 1.5 inches off the bum and hips. I do feel great in it though. See attached photo. I've been on massive spend up since finishing. Like literally four pairs of ugg , boots trainers and heeled boots. Jack wills hoodys and PJS and new super dry bottoms all XS size. I am enjoying my time off and my house is immaculate again which is lovely and I've cooked meals every night again. Weight is still 9st 6 so can't grumble but I do want to put on a bit or at least tone up .

Hey banded! Glad to hear your taking care of you!! I always love hearing about your shopping trips! Shopping is defo more fun for me as I lose weight!!

You look fantastic in your dress!! your arms look very toned in the picture!

I think I may get Botox once iv lost a bit more weight! xxx

 

[BandedHun]

Yes Sharon go for it.

I'll post when I get home today and let you know how it goes. Apparently takes two weeks for settlement and see the difference, but be interesting, not that I overly need it but i just freshen up. Esp for the wedding coming up.

 

[BandedHun]

So botox hurts a bit. I've got several pin prick marks in my face too. I got sick earlier as I've had no appetite and I forced food down. When I was sick blood started trickling out of the pin sights lol. Managed to keep it a secret from everyone too. Including OH. Can't wait to see the results ...

I've been rough the last two days think it's coz I'm having a changing medication from GP. Nose bleeds, great nights sleep and just so fatigued all day. Giving it 7 days on the meds see how I get on. My moods better but my energy is low and I just can't contain my fed up mess with people . It's like a complete intolerance. :-(

I'll get there.

 

[sharon2014]

So botox hurts a bit. I've got several pin prick marks in my face too. I got sick earlier as I've had no appetite and I forced food down. When I was sick blood started trickling out of the pin sights lol. Managed to keep it a secret from everyone too. Including OH. Can't wait to see the results ... I've been rough the last two days think it's coz I'm having a changing medication from GP. Nose bleeds, great nights sleep and just so fatigued all day. Giving it 7 days on the meds see how I get on. My moods better but my energy is low and I just can't contain my fed up mess with people . It's like a complete intolerance. :-( I'll get there.

Aww glad you got it done! Looking forward to seeing the results!!

Hope your meds kick in, I know it takes time for our bodies to adjust, but you seem to be on the mend one thing at a time love xx

 

[BandedHun]

So today I've consumed 2500 kcal's . On purpose, I've had nothing but negativity over the way I look. I look Ill according to OH dad. Then my mum decides to tell all her friends and they agree after seeing me in my wedding dress photo I look ill... It's bull poo. I've got an OH who just is sour faced all the time coz his weight and he try's telling me I'm the problem. Grrrrr! I just want everyone to F.Off. In the nicest way. I eat my calories 1200-1600 a day. Sometimes less depending on the new meds as they are ( were) making it hard to find an appetite. I like my size. I feel comfortable. I enjoy parts of life I never thought I'd ever enjoy. Shops etc. Socialising. I don't wear next to any make up any more, Y ? Because I'm ok with how I look, yes you could argue about having Botox means I'm not happy but I'm doing that again so I don't have to wear makes up etc. I can just be me. ( with my hair extensions... Lol ... Which are being done on Monday I have u know )

Anyway, I'm agitated today. I'm pissed off. My whole reason I didn't wanna tell people is coming alive. My mum tells me her friend went to a sudden death of a 38 year old man the other day with a band.... Thanks! All of a sudden all this cr&p is coming out and I don't wanna hear it. Me and the OH are at breaking point- I need a heart to heart because , and I apologise but I just don't want sex anymore. Has anyone else found this? I don't enjoy it? I don't like being touched and I just am exhausted most days... Is this normal for a girl who's 31 and lost nearly 7st??? Help ....

Anyway all my deliveries arrived bar my smaller UGG sparkly trainers, and u did buy a fur headband and UGG swarvoski crystal gloves! Sooooo good coz I'm so cold all the time . But my fav buy had to be my UGG healed boots which you can pull the fur up and they look amazing, my new PINK top ( Victoria secrets) and my jack wills PJs which I will be gracing my bed with shortly, all size 8 but the PJs are tad big.

OH treated me to a new watch yesterday too... My swatch watch I really wanted. They are only £38 but I loved my old one and this ones just to die for ..... ( attached ) so I've massively over spent this month and next month I want a lip fill on my top lip and another line of Botox but I'll have that done at THG in London on my next fill app.


Right so I'm off to bed with a huge full belly that I forgot could feel so sickly full ... I do NOT miss that feeling at all. It's awful.

 

[WeightlossDreamer]

Live the watch Hun! Sorry your getting such negativity that really sucks! If it makes any difference I thought you looked amazing in your wedding gown. The smile on your face was enough to know your happy.
I can't really help with oh as luckily we had our bands together. But it's unfair of him to make u feel like crap because he does. When your knackered sometimes you just don't want to do the whole sex thing and you know what that's completely normal! Wouldn't worry about that plus if they've put you on anti d's it can dampen your libido! I know it did mine!
Have a heart to heart with oh see if you can't make him change his eating habits a lil bit x x

 

[mskimus]

I have followed your story but never reply I just like to lurk and I always relate to you so well but this post relates to my situation so much it's crazy. I had a mini gastric bypass in April 2014 so very close to you when u had your band. I was 17 stone 4 pounds and I'm now 9 stone 3 pounds I'm 5"7. So our weights are very close. My partner hates that I am so slim size 8 sometimes a 6 on top he says I look ill and look like I have a serious medical condition or an eating disorder. I kept my surgery a secret only my fiancé and my mum and dad know I had it. Don't get me wrong he loves that I'm happy and I can buy the smallest cothes in all the shops but I feel he fancied me when I was about 11 stone he says that's when I looked best. I think he just prefers girls with a bit of meat on there bones. Don't get me wrong he's very supportive but the comments are coming daily now and it really is getting me down and my dad makes the same comments . I have been really down since I have had surgery which I don't understand as Iv never been so happy with how I look other than the loose skin. Maybe it's a hormone imbalance I don't know. I think my brain will catch up with my body in time and things will change. SEX well I have always had a high sex drive I'm 33yrs old and Iv always felt like I was punching above my weight with my bloke. We have been together 14yrs and got 2 kids still fancy him as much as the day I met him but hate sex can't bear it, hate him touching me. And truthfully as a skinny person it sometimes hurts I'm not as turned on like I use to be I just don't understand it and he doesn't either. I have felt like this for a long aswell and it's not getting any better.

 

[mskimus]

Sorry got sent without finishing.
Anyways I think as long as you feel good they will eventually get used to it. Well that's what I hope will happen for me and it's your body so I feel angry when people comment. I always say its acceptable to mention when someone's slim but it's only wrong to mention how fat someone is, it works both ways. Anyways I'm sending you hugs and I'm glad you have quit your job as it just seemed like you was running yourself in to the ground. I think your wedding dress is beautiful and you look beautiful in it. Xxx

 

[BandedHun]

Ahhh thanks everyone. It was really getting to thinking something was wrong. Mrs kins- totally relate and to see your weight go the same as mine and size wise makes me feel better, I think it's just an individual thing. I'm hoping the sex thing will find its place and I'm certain the meds are not helping.

Today I'm making them ( my family ) a Sunday roast so they will be happy but I'm eating light myself. The slider foods that I binged on yesterday to get me to 2500 kcal's have played havoc with my bowels all night. I feel so bloated ... All that and I still only put on 1.5lbs! Never mind. I'm happy like Sharon and everyone has said. F*ck them.

Big big thanks to all the comments it's really really helpful. ESP advice on the sex stuff. I know it's personal but I just felt so alone with it. It's a hard time anyway as certain things in TV and the stuff I have going on from my former job is really hindering my ability to like men, myself and enjoy small things like intimacy, in life.

Gosh my tummy hurts today!!!! :-(

Xxxxx thanks everyone xxxxx

 

[kurstywursty]

Banded. I was on anti depressants on and off for many years. They really damp,ened my sex drive. When I met my current husband I spoke to my mental heal team and the pharmacy at Monklands hospital done a great deal of research and came up with an old fashioned med called moclobomide. They work in the opposite way to modern anti depressants but they sorted out the sex drive problems. Few foods you can't eat with them. Blue cheese and red wine, port. I found that hard.

If you have been stressed out...that can also affect your libido

If you think it's your earlier issues/job etc....get some counselling babe xxxx

Don't overthink all the other stuff- just be happy and enjoy your total gorgeousness

My husband does not want me to loss any more weight and my aunt told me yesterday that I looked pinched and that I should stop. I can get through to folks at I still have 2st to go to reach the top end of my normal weight range

My husband told me last night that I had obsessed about my weight since August and it was time to start concentrating on a normal lifestyle. We will be opening our van in a few weeks time and he said he doesn't want me sitting miserable on a nice evening because I can't sit out in the sun on our decking at the van with a glass of wine etc without beating myself up

It's hard, but I'm just going to please myself and try to talk the talk on the normal lifestyle stuff

Put you first for a wee while, shut the other stuff out, just nod your head and get on with what your doing xxx

 

[BandedHun]

Well today after having some time to myself- finally. Watching the TV I want to watch I feel so much better. Lots of warm drinks . Got all my house work done whilst he went out and run. Got my dogs all cleaned and guinea pigs and sorted lots of bits out and I feel so much better.

Made a beautiful home made roast and banoffee pie .... Yummmm....

So just chilling reading cosmopolitan mag on the sofa in the warm and I think not taking those tablets was a good move! Xxx

 

[mouse57]

Do you think the lack of sex drive is to do with all the hormone changes ( now) and once your body settles down it will come back. You need to take every day as it comes( pardon the pun) stress puts the body of sex along with other thing, good luck

 

[BandedHun]

Yes I do to a certain degree mouse. I think also lack in energy too. Like days when my calories are low and that I think maybe that has a massive impact. Psychologically though I think the pain aspect and the fact im so boney now it hurts and that's stopping me from enjoying it like I used too. Plus I'm bloody cold all the time !!! I don't wanna be naked and exposed at all..... Layers and layers of clothing and the heating on 24/7 is needed for me

Oh why not.... My new Jack Wills PJs ... Rocking the PJ selfie! Happy Sunday's!!!

 

[BandedHun]

Check out the scraggy hair too! That's all being done tomorrow ,.,. So I will update you with a new hair look tomorrow .... Long 18 inch extensions going in!!!! Xxx

 

[mouse57]

Joke coming up ...........crotchless that's all I'm saying lol

 

[kurstywursty]

Those pj's look very toasty and like an all over chastity belt lol xx

 

[WeightlossDreamer]

Haha lol I'm loving the pjs!!!!!! X x

 

[BandedHun]

Joke coming up ...........crotchless that's all I'm saying lol

Pmsl!!!! Could you imagine if I actually posted crutch less PJs xxxx

 

[mouse57]

Well you wouldn't have to get all your kite of that way, work up a sweat and all will be happy lol plus keeping your clothes will add yo the mystery of the act and help with the boney situation