upset and hurt

[bakedbean]

Tell him you will be a hot mana on the beach n you will be on his arm!! Lol good luck remember your doing it for yourself and to be healthy so your around longer to live life with himxx

 

[NT1977]

I am a bit late to this but just wanted to say to stick with it and once he sees all the positives he should start to see differently, if he doesn't then you will have to decide what you want. This is a massive change to watch someone go through and can make people insecure in themselves to watch. My friend went through similar with her husband when she lost 12 stone, they got through it though. Good luck lovely, you have to be happy and do what feels right for you xxx

 

[femfrankie]

My hubby is my rock but even he has had a wobble or two. We used to love our Saturday nights in for instance.. A movie night with loads of goody snacks and a few glasses of wine.... He found it really hard watch me let that one go. I really felt for him because he would eat his goodies in the kitchen out of sight. I crossed him over this and told that I don't mind him eating in front of me but he still struggled to do this. I got round this by identifying things that I could eat/drink as a replacement to try and make it feel a bit more relaxed.. Homemade popcorn is my fav or a small handful of cashew nuts is another. We still go out for meals only difference is I just choose healthy options. Yes I do only have the balloon but to be honest my choices are probably more limited than someone who has a bypass as I suffer from severe reflux and have to eat & drink bland foods (god I miss my spicy foods). So although it is early days for you both on this journey you will still be able to do those things you enjoyed before. You will just be doing it with smaller healthier portions. At the end of the day it's the company that matters not the food & as I have become more mobile we have been able to go walking together and do more together so after a 7 stone loss he is now starting to reap the benefits of having a healthier me... Life is becoming more fun . He will come round just remember it's a major thing for him too hun and he will also be worried about you too. X

 

[paddyp]

So you went against his wishes, to have a healthier happier life and probably live longer without the risks of diabetes, hypertension, joint problems and more. What's the problem eh? The problem is entirely his, and whilst I would be empathetic to the difficulty he is having coming to terms with you making the right choice for you, I would also be making it very clear that he has no right to make you feel guilty about what you have done and that if he can't support you in this decision then it doesn't bode well for the future xx

 

[pinkprincess77]

So you went against his wishes, to have a healthier happier life and probably live longer without the risks of diabetes, hypertension, joint problems and more. What's the problem eh? The problem is entirely his, and whilst I would be empathetic to the difficulty he is having coming to terms with you making the right choice for you, I would also be making it very clear that he has no right to make you feel guilty about what you have done and that if he can't support you in this decision then it doesn't bode well for the future xx

I think he's coming round to the idea. He's booked and paid for us both to go on holiday in September and said he will take me shopping and buy me some new clothes closer to the time.

I don't think he would do that if he was planning on ending it because of what I have done. He lives buying me new clothes so it will be better when I can wear nice 'girly things' and feel nice in them. X

 

[Jozefina]

You sound a bit happier at the end of the thread than you did at the beginning! I hope he gets used to the idea of a new you and realises soon what a wonderful thing you've done for you, your future and your child - and that he can be part of that through his love and support. Given that you've said he's basically a good guy, it sounds as if he'll get there in the end.

I think the suggestion further up-thread of finding new things to do together is a great idea, once you are more healed and feeling energetic xx

 

[pinkprincess77]

Im feeling alot better thanks. Its a major change for everyone and I think sometimes we forget to think how it may be for our partners too. It helps that I am now getting a bit of sleep so I'm not super emotional lol.

He also seems to be more of his usual self ringing me as soon as he finishes work and the little I love you messages. He also probably realised how much it hurt me with what he said. I am exactly the same person I'm just getting happier day by day. Once I feel a little better I'm going to suggest us going swimming and start going more walks

Just because I can't eat like a pig any more doesn't mean my life as ended.far from it, my life as now begun and my future it brighter and happier. ))) xx

 

[icey]

Just because I can't eat like a pig any more doesn't mean my life as ended.far from it, my life as now begun and my future it brighter and happier. ))) xx

Thats how i feel..... I will not be fat @ 40! I have the full support of my hubby life is a bit dull @ the moment it can only get better hun x

 

[pinkprincess77]

All is back to normal with us now
He's noticed how happy I am. I have honestly never been so happy or felt so good. I'm only 12 days post op so things can only keep getting better. It is by far the best decision I have ever made in my life, and he's realising I've done the right thing .

The futures bright, the future in slimmer xx

 

[icey]

Brilliant sounds like your much happier and the future is certainly slimmer and of course brighter :O)