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newbie susie starting out.... help
- Thread starter newbie
- Start date
charliegirl
New Member
Hi Susie sorry your having problems chick, the time of the year does not help. We are all here to support you chick and not just with your surgery...((hugs))...xx
well i am 7 years older than my husband and i have bad diabetes so it would be really dangerous for me to have children. we talked about the age difference and children before we got married and during. now after 5 years he says it really bothers him not to have children. he doesnt know if hes coming or going! he went to a pub party friday and of course in a pub he started smoking again after such a long time. then people were talking about family, kids etc. and he had a disbled wife at home and no children. i asked if he wanted to leave and he says he wants to stay and see me through the syrgery and be there for me etc. GOD HELP ME!!!
susie
susie
kerry main
New Member
:wave_cry: hi im very new at this and would like anyones help. im thinking ov having a gastric band fitted and am very nervie. can any one help with the post op diet and the experiance they have had. i see the consultant at the hospital group onthe 14th december, is there any questions i need to ask. please help, kerry
charliegirl
New Member
Hi Kerry welcome to minis, you might be better starting your own thread as more folk might see it. I cant help with the band as I have had the bypass. I did not need to do the pre op diet as I only had three days notice. There are a load of banders on here that will be along soon to give you advice and your amongst the right people for support...xx
shelbell
Proudly maintaining
Susie :hug99: I can truly empathise, as my hubby would love a child of his own, but I won't give him one because there are major risks involved. We did try for a while but I made the decision to stop trying as my son is 7 and I don't want to go back to the beginning all over again. We've had lots of talks about it all, as my main concern is that he'd end up resenting me for it, so I do understand where you're coming from.
I would suggest asking your hubbs if he would consider relationship counselling with you, as a starting point. It will give you a neutral and controlled ground to discuss your issues and fears without it being able to escalate into a row or someone flouncing off.
What about looking into something like fostering or adoption? Maybe you could say to hubbs that once the two of you have sorted your differences out you could look into alternatives?
Remember there are so many of us here for you, so get what you want off your chest x
I would suggest asking your hubbs if he would consider relationship counselling with you, as a starting point. It will give you a neutral and controlled ground to discuss your issues and fears without it being able to escalate into a row or someone flouncing off.
What about looking into something like fostering or adoption? Maybe you could say to hubbs that once the two of you have sorted your differences out you could look into alternatives?
Remember there are so many of us here for you, so get what you want off your chest x
tesmaralda
New Member
a big hug from me am only ever at the end of an email
phatgirl
New Member
Sorry you are having such a time of things. I am currently unable to have children (severe PCOS) and I have been married for 11 years. I know it is hard on my hubby, I see how he is when he catches up with old friends and they have 1,2,3 or even 4 kids 
in the time we have been married. The friend with 4 kids was in our wedding, that couple met the same week as me and my hubbs! And now they are a family of 6! I can totally relate. I think that if you were both able to air your issues and fears in a safe place (like Shel suggested) you might see that you can work things out. I hope the best for you and know where you are coming from. Don't forget that things will change for you medically after surgery, too, if that is an option for you.
((Hugs))
Nichole
in the time we have been married. The friend with 4 kids was in our wedding, that couple met the same week as me and my hubbs! And now they are a family of 6! I can totally relate. I think that if you were both able to air your issues and fears in a safe place (like Shel suggested) you might see that you can work things out. I hope the best for you and know where you are coming from. Don't forget that things will change for you medically after surgery, too, if that is an option for you.((Hugs))
Nichole
