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Think Im going to bail

Caroline I can see where you are coming from and may I appologise for saying that everyone needs you and not mentioning that we are here for you too should you need support but I honestly thought that was just an assumed certainty seeing as so many people on here care about you, obviously it wasn't and i see now we all need reassurance sometimes that people are there for us as we are for them. Well I am way behind your date post op I am only 9 weeks post op but I can say for certain if you ever need a chat or to hear some well meaning advice I am here for you hun and so are many many others of us on this site xxx
 
Hi
Weight is such a sensitive issue that something that is typed rather than said sometimes can come across wrong.
Please dont leave, it takes post oppers to give advice to others xxx
I am only just ost op 24 hours to be honest lol its people like you that have given me advice support and info and without that where woudl all the pre oppers be ?
I woudl PM the person xxxx
Helen
 
yeah i agree with everyone else stay here please dont leave, i fall out with ppl all the time on diff forums because of how things are put, as suggested pm the person and see if it can be resolved which im sure it can be.

liz x
 
u have many friends on here that are here to support u and give u advice, pls dont let what happened get u down like every1 sed pm the person and sort it out or simple just dont post on any questions they ask so it can never happen again, i think of this forum as huge support and every1 has supported me and i think were all here for each other and support each other xxxxxxxxxxx
 
It would be a huge shame to lose you, it is always a shame to lose a good person.
What people seem to forget is that just because someone is further down the line and so more experienced in certain aspects of the journey, it doesnt mean that their journey is over and they know everything that there is to know. I am two and a half months post-op but I am betting that at two and a half YEARS post op I will still be needing advice and guidance. When someone takes on a guiding role it is very easy to see them as not needing support themselves, when in fact, they definately do.
I totally understand what you mean about people that you went through it all with at the same time getting distant, if feels slightly the same for me, most seem to be on less and less as their lives open up more to them and I feel slightly lonely sometimes, so that aspect I feel totally understanding about.
We just all need to remember that this is a lifelong journey and for us that had surgery more recently or are still post-op, we need to remember that the long termers are still on their journeys too and they need just as much support and nurturing as we do.
I hope that you stay around just because you would be missed if you left, as a person, not just as a wealth of knowledge. I dont know how much support I can give but if you ever need support or advice on anything then I would gladly offer both xx
Steph xx
 
Caroline people look at your stats and think you know it all, you have been successful. If you don't say that you want support then how are they to give it to you. Surely the level of responses here show that people respect you and would like for you to stay here.

I think it's such a shame that this firework was light by a misinterpreted response to a post. My OH does it regular, he puts something down and it sounds bloody awful but he doesn't read it like the person reading it for the first time... You should speak to the person involved (god i hope it wasn't me). x

I also get what you say about other people who were at your level who are no longer around.... I think you would call that getting what you need out of something and now having no use for the forum.

I think maybe a step away for a few weeks and see if you miss the camaraderie of the group. I know there are times when we just need a break....

Good luck with your choice and many apologies for the ramblings, trying not to mix it up the wrong way xxx
 
Although I don't post a lot, I read often, I think it's a shame you feel you need to go:(
I'm 7 month post-op but don't feel I can add anything to the vast knowledge of members here so I just read and learn and get reassurance, I do love this site.
Please stay, what you did for Roch is so kind, not many people would do that, you are obviously a very special and kind person and would be a loss to everyone here.
Hugs, Laura x
 
I feel it is so sad that you feel this way :0( I do understand what you mean though. I myself try to offer snippets of advice but take ALOT from this site. I sometimes type things just to get them out of my system cause I feel no one I know understands what my journey is like. I am so grateful to this site and people like yourself who offer advice and support to everyone - with no expectations in return. I don't know what I would have done had it not been for people on this site (and a place to vent). I completely support and respect your decision, but think it would be an awful waste as if you can make a difference to one person then everything else is worth it - take care hunni xxx
 
I am going to be controversial. If you feel you ned to go, then go. You are from what you are saying, in a different place and I fully get what you are saying about needing support just as much as others and if, at this stage in your life you need that support from elsewhere, so be it. It will in no means belittle the massive amounts of support you have evidently provided to others and furthermore will in no way lessen the support people are showing to you.
I read the comments surrounding the post you made and personally think you were spot on with your comments. personally, I also think the replies back were harsh and I would be p****d off as well, having taken the time to reply to someone who had publicly stated something on an open forum for anyone to reply to. BUT, it is a public forum and there is always this problem that arises and as I have commented on similar threads, it saddens me when I see these kinds of negative responses from people.
I personally do not reply much anymore either as the negativity wears me down. So, although it may not sound supportive, IT IS. Take a break out if that is what you need. I know that everyone will welcome you back with open arms and IF YOU need support along the way, you have some really good contacts you can PM on here.You are too well though of for anyone to turn their back on you.

xxxx
 
Dont go caroline!!! My op was around about the same time as yours was and i can also feel quite lonely on here as there dont seem to be many who are at our stage and alot of the regulars have gone but 2bandsliz is back! maybe have a break and see how you feel but you will be sadly missed. I hope you do come back but if you dont then i wish you all the best in life, take care xxx
 
I'm pre-op at the minute and because of that I'm taking a huge amount of support from the forum. Even if I don't post, just reading others posts and diaries has been more help than I can express. I would hope that when I'm 6 months plus post-op that I will be supporting those people new to the forum who are where I am now.

Although I don't have your experience I would always offer my support and a friendly ear to anyone who needs it. So if you would like someone to vent to, please feel free to PM me.

I realise how forums can seem draining on people when you seem to be giving all the time and not getting anything in return. I wish you all the best for the future and hope you do decide to stay. xx
 
Hi Caroline

You need to do whatever is best for you.

However can I just throw into the mix that all of us longish post opers have a section on this forum for post 6 months and none of us use it to chat and discuss things more relevant to us. Perhaps we should get to it and make that a relevant section to visit.

Hoping you stay as you will be missed and I feel one of the downsides of this site is the lack of regular contact for longer term post op peeps

M
 
I totally agree with M x
 
There are a few of us further out around, but most of us don't post as much these days. I find that if I do I am just answering the same questions over and over again which gets frustrating.

What I wanted to say though is that time passed doesn't necessarily mean wisdom gained. I have received the most relevant advice and support from Nic, who had her surgery a good few months after me, because she has researched and read up and truly understands the science behind things. So don't discount everyone who came after you, as sometimes people have a lot more to offer than we give them credit for.
 
I just wanted to add that some people post more than others, some people click better than others but we are all here for the same thing and no matter whether we are waiting for wls or we have just had wls, had it 6, 12 18 months or years ago. We all have our own stories and advice and suggestions. I am always asking questions and people answer them and no matter what whether it is someone who has hardly any knowledge or excellent knowledge it is all relevant otherwise what would be the point of the forum.

When I first joined I would constantly see, phatgirl, charliegirl, shellbell, Alia, waynetta, silver surfer, siverfox, fat girl slim and many many others and I read their posts and learnt loads even though I was nowhere near wls thats what got me ready for it and I remember things now and think oh right thats what happened to them or thats what they did.
I just dont think we should give up, it is easy to be on here 24/7 when you are new or have just had wls as you need the advice but 6 months down the line when you have been there done it and got the smaller T shirt dont leave for good because who will be there then to help ?

Helen
sorry rant over x
 
Your going no where Mrs!!!! I need you and so do all the others. I get rudeness from time to time but hey!! its water off a ducks back with me. I dont give a monkeys what peeps say about me, they ask advice you give it if its not what they like to hear then tough!! you viewed your oppinion the other day and thats that in my eyes you were correct in what you advised, and on the other hand the lady in question I surpose was worried about her health at that moment in time and unfortunatly you got the brunt of it. But why not p.m each other and sort the lil problem out after all I dont think either of you meant to hurt one anothers feelings. All in all you are too valuble to lose Caroline with all your knowledge. So please re-think!!!! Kind regards Gail x
 
Last edited:
Hey Caroline,

I really hope that you decide not to leave - you were right about my problem. I suppose that I just didn't want to hear that I was doing something wrong. I never intended to upset you and I am very sorry that you were. Please accept my sincere apology.

Many blessings, whatever you decide.
Sam
 
Sam hat off to you darling it takes a big person to do that xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
 
i agree . good on you sam xx
 
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