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All booked and now on that road of no return
- Thread starter countrywench
- Start date
countrywench
Well-Known Member
Hey Tracey
Yep she's doing amazingly well .. No pain at all which is brilliant .. she is finding it hard to keep up with fluids as she doesn't feel hungry or thirsty at all ..
when she started her journey she weighed 28st give or take a pound .. we weighed her yesterday morning and she's
25st 11lb ! So a loss of 31lb in 6 weeks all together .. better than we could ever wish for .. She was so happy .. yesterday while waddling round Asda I could see she that her ass shelf had shrunk and she was hooking at her trousers ..
She was staying with me but feels well enough to go back to her flat , so it's all down to her now to learn her new life ..
Xxxx
Yep she's doing amazingly well .. No pain at all which is brilliant .. she is finding it hard to keep up with fluids as she doesn't feel hungry or thirsty at all ..
when she started her journey she weighed 28st give or take a pound .. we weighed her yesterday morning and she's
25st 11lb ! So a loss of 31lb in 6 weeks all together .. better than we could ever wish for .. She was so happy .. yesterday while waddling round Asda I could see she that her ass shelf had shrunk and she was hooking at her trousers ..
She was staying with me but feels well enough to go back to her flat , so it's all down to her now to learn her new life ..
Xxxx
countrywench
Well-Known Member
Hi guys
I want to pick brains and have a rant tonight .. this is the only place I can do this as non of my family are on here ..
My neice , who is 23 . She has watched me in the last year with my band and has wanted one also .. she has a bmi of 56 I think , she's only 5ft .. She has constantly asked me what I eat and for advice , so she hasn't done this lightly I don't think ..
Well 2 weeks ago I sat with her one the day she had a band fitted , privately , her dad loaned her the £6,000 .. She didn't stick to the pre op diet in my opinion , she swapped the calories in milk for other food .. she did lose about 10lb I think , but the op went ahead despite me asking her a few times if she thought she was doing the right thing and taking it seriously .. Hammering home that having the band is a totally different way of eating ..
So , she popped in yesterday , so she is 2 weeks post op .. asked her if she'd weighed herself , she was a bit reluctant to discuss it just saying she was going to weigh in when she thinks all the swelling has gone down , which I think is a good idea .. so I ask her what she's having for lunch , to which she replied
" a large cod and a pea fritter from the chip ship , but I'm taking the batter off so it's a good source of protein "
I couldn't say a word , I just stared at her .. Rhen she's rambling about eating macaroni cheese followed by a cornetto because there's so much protein in the cheese sauce and the milk in the ice cream ..
Am I wrong ? Doesn't chip shop cod have the highest calories ever ? Whether it's batter has been removed or not ? What about a pea fritter for goodnesss sake ! I know I couldn't even eat a whole pea fritter let alone the fish as well !
Her dad then tells me later that she's buying the multi boxes of cornettos and eating the 4 in a day ..
She is totally off in her own dream world isn't she ? Lying to herself about food ? How can she be eating that sort of food when she's had weight loss surgery ! She is the type of person who knows everything I have to say and will always do her own thing ..
Like I said I've hammered it home time and time again the whole point of the band is to change your life style and eat healthily ..
I am speechless to be honest ..
I want to pick brains and have a rant tonight .. this is the only place I can do this as non of my family are on here ..
My neice , who is 23 . She has watched me in the last year with my band and has wanted one also .. she has a bmi of 56 I think , she's only 5ft .. She has constantly asked me what I eat and for advice , so she hasn't done this lightly I don't think ..
Well 2 weeks ago I sat with her one the day she had a band fitted , privately , her dad loaned her the £6,000 .. She didn't stick to the pre op diet in my opinion , she swapped the calories in milk for other food .. she did lose about 10lb I think , but the op went ahead despite me asking her a few times if she thought she was doing the right thing and taking it seriously .. Hammering home that having the band is a totally different way of eating ..
So , she popped in yesterday , so she is 2 weeks post op .. asked her if she'd weighed herself , she was a bit reluctant to discuss it just saying she was going to weigh in when she thinks all the swelling has gone down , which I think is a good idea .. so I ask her what she's having for lunch , to which she replied
" a large cod and a pea fritter from the chip ship , but I'm taking the batter off so it's a good source of protein "
I couldn't say a word , I just stared at her .. Rhen she's rambling about eating macaroni cheese followed by a cornetto because there's so much protein in the cheese sauce and the milk in the ice cream ..
Am I wrong ? Doesn't chip shop cod have the highest calories ever ? Whether it's batter has been removed or not ? What about a pea fritter for goodnesss sake ! I know I couldn't even eat a whole pea fritter let alone the fish as well !
Her dad then tells me later that she's buying the multi boxes of cornettos and eating the 4 in a day ..
She is totally off in her own dream world isn't she ? Lying to herself about food ? How can she be eating that sort of food when she's had weight loss surgery ! She is the type of person who knows everything I have to say and will always do her own thing ..
Like I said I've hammered it home time and time again the whole point of the band is to change your life style and eat healthily ..
I am speechless to be honest ..
SAM55
Well-Known Member
It must be so hard to watch your niece doing this, but at 23 she won't have the maturity to deal with the emotions involved and having it privately she won't have had to 'prove' she can do it or be psychologically assessed, like you have to with the NHS. Has she had it done at the same hospital as you, and therefore has she been given the same post op info and support?
Her food choices certainly don't sound ideal, although if she managed the LRD, then she obviously has some sticking power. A lot of NHS dietitians tell you, you can swap between, milk diet and chicken/greens diet, provided you are consistent on a particular day.
I know you want to be able to do something to help, and i know you like cooking. Could you offer to pre prepare some suitable food portions for her?
countrywench
Well-Known Member
Her whole package was different to mine .. different company, different surgeon , different hospital .. Again I tried to steer her toward the company I've used and support and info has been amazing ..
She is so head strong and blinkered you cannot get through to her .. If you suggest something ,even if she has asked for info and you give her the bottom line in black and white , she will only go the way she thinks is right and beneficial to her .. I suggested she calls her team for support but her answer was that she has read a book she bought , same one as me actually , and she knows it all .. Said the milk diet could be swapped and changed , swapping the milk carbs and calls for something else ..
She is very immature in herself that's it true , and I have told her for the last year since I've had mine done , how very hard it is leaving unhealthy foods behind ..
Is chip shop cod without batter healthy ? Does anyone know ? I cannot find info on the net about this ..
when faced with a person who will not listen to good sound advice it's so hard and frustrating ... I can only hope she sees the light soon ..
She is so head strong and blinkered you cannot get through to her .. If you suggest something ,even if she has asked for info and you give her the bottom line in black and white , she will only go the way she thinks is right and beneficial to her .. I suggested she calls her team for support but her answer was that she has read a book she bought , same one as me actually , and she knows it all .. Said the milk diet could be swapped and changed , swapping the milk carbs and calls for something else ..
She is very immature in herself that's it true , and I have told her for the last year since I've had mine done , how very hard it is leaving unhealthy foods behind ..
Is chip shop cod without batter healthy ? Does anyone know ? I cannot find info on the net about this ..
when faced with a person who will not listen to good sound advice it's so hard and frustrating ... I can only hope she sees the light soon ..
Bling Babe
Well-Known Member
What an awful shame and a complete waste of her fathers money, it's very odd that she asked you so much and has witnessed your lifestyle and food choices yet still thinks that she can make these bad food choices
could it be that she is suffering from food mourning, missing her old eating habits and is in turn rebelling with false belief that it won't affect her ? You do say that she will do her own thing so I'm guessing she's fairly headstrong
it would be such a shame to put herself through that only for it to fail, I don't have all the answers I just feel that it could be along these lines
I'm not sure if I agree that a 23 year old is not mature enough I believe everyone is different including their maturity, perhaps as it's been "handed to her on a plate" with her father paying she's not taking it seriously enough, I like Sam55's idea of you cooking some portion control nutritional food and if your happy to do that it could well get her back on track, do you think she would accept your offer of help, how about some "tough love" or would that cause to many problems within the family ? Xx
could it be that she is suffering from food mourning, missing her old eating habits and is in turn rebelling with false belief that it won't affect her ? You do say that she will do her own thing so I'm guessing she's fairly headstrong
it would be such a shame to put herself through that only for it to fail, I don't have all the answers I just feel that it could be along these lines
I'm not sure if I agree that a 23 year old is not mature enough I believe everyone is different including their maturity, perhaps as it's been "handed to her on a plate" with her father paying she's not taking it seriously enough, I like Sam55's idea of you cooking some portion control nutritional food and if your happy to do that it could well get her back on track, do you think she would accept your offer of help, how about some "tough love" or would that cause to many problems within the family ? Xx
Bling Babe
Well-Known Member
It could quite possibly be healthy BUT I know I wouldn't be able to remove the batter, I would have to eat it, maybe she is a much stronger person than me, however it not really getting into a healthy eating mindset is it x
Ian2Big
Well-Known Member
So a bit of research.
Pea Fritter is approx 164 Cals (7 g Fat, 19 g Carbs, 6 g Protein), Large Cod Battered approx 588 cals (27 g Fat, 24g Carbs, 60g Protein). Taking the batter off probably only removes the carbs which is about 90 Calories. So still a large amount for one meal. Oh and approx 200 calories in a cornetto. Source http://www.myfitnesspal.com
She probably thinks the band will fix everything and has not come to terms with the fact that she has to do it. Maybe if she sees how your daughter is losing weight, it might give her the incentive that is needed to follow a sensible eating plan.
Pea Fritter is approx 164 Cals (7 g Fat, 19 g Carbs, 6 g Protein), Large Cod Battered approx 588 cals (27 g Fat, 24g Carbs, 60g Protein). Taking the batter off probably only removes the carbs which is about 90 Calories. So still a large amount for one meal. Oh and approx 200 calories in a cornetto. Source http://www.myfitnesspal.com
She probably thinks the band will fix everything and has not come to terms with the fact that she has to do it. Maybe if she sees how your daughter is losing weight, it might give her the incentive that is needed to follow a sensible eating plan.
starryeyed
Well-Known Member
The cod is healthier when batter is removed as that's what's cooked in the oil. The fish is cooked beneath the batter. I wouldn't say it's healthy but it's the healthier option at a fish and chip shop and you have no other alternative lol
countrywench
Well-Known Member
Cheers for that Ian !
There must be a certain amount of fat/oil that seeps into fried food ? I personally would not touch anything from anything from a chip shop now , the thought of that type of food makes me nauseous.. Esp after my KFC incident urghhh
Bling you may be right and she pushing the boundaries and mourning , I just can't understand her .. Maybe she will prove me wrong and is actually doing a good job .. Dunno .. I'm taking her for her 6 week check up so will be interesting to see if she gets any weight loss results ..
Don't get me wrong I fully understand the massive issues with food addiction and I know how hard you have to fight against the tide .. My personality is addictive in nature , so when I go into something new I go all in full speed , full steam ... right now my dreams and thoughts are full of caramel waffle biscuits , the ones you find in coffee shops ? Found them in Sainsbury's, 10 to a packet , £1.50 .. holy moley those things are heaven sent , I'm not kidding .. Sweet and crunchy in the most amazing way .. But not when you eat the whole damn packet and start on another !
You know when you had that first crush on someone and you find yourself walking past where they live/work just so you can catch a quick peak at them ? This is how those bloody biscuits call me .. Entering the aisle where they are makes my heart rate go up ! I walk past and have to look at them hahahah ! It honestly takes all my strength not to put a packet in the trolley ..
This food addiction is going to be my personal addiction forever and something I'm going to have to fight with on a daily basis ..
This is where she is going to have to dig deep and fight , until she finds the grit to do that , I'm not sure if the band is going to work
There must be a certain amount of fat/oil that seeps into fried food ? I personally would not touch anything from anything from a chip shop now , the thought of that type of food makes me nauseous.. Esp after my KFC incident urghhh
Bling you may be right and she pushing the boundaries and mourning , I just can't understand her .. Maybe she will prove me wrong and is actually doing a good job .. Dunno .. I'm taking her for her 6 week check up so will be interesting to see if she gets any weight loss results ..
Don't get me wrong I fully understand the massive issues with food addiction and I know how hard you have to fight against the tide .. My personality is addictive in nature , so when I go into something new I go all in full speed , full steam ... right now my dreams and thoughts are full of caramel waffle biscuits , the ones you find in coffee shops ? Found them in Sainsbury's, 10 to a packet , £1.50 .. holy moley those things are heaven sent , I'm not kidding .. Sweet and crunchy in the most amazing way .. But not when you eat the whole damn packet and start on another !
You know when you had that first crush on someone and you find yourself walking past where they live/work just so you can catch a quick peak at them ? This is how those bloody biscuits call me .. Entering the aisle where they are makes my heart rate go up ! I walk past and have to look at them hahahah ! It honestly takes all my strength not to put a packet in the trolley ..
This food addiction is going to be my personal addiction forever and something I'm going to have to fight with on a daily basis ..
This is where she is going to have to dig deep and fight , until she finds the grit to do that , I'm not sure if the band is going to work
FeeBee
Well-Known Member
I'm guessing the food she's eating is going through the band ok because otherwise you'd hope the sickness would stop her.
I agree with @Bling Babe that maturity isn't an age related thing (Lord knows I've met some very immature people in their 60's &70's!) But it doesn't sound like she's really thought about the changes WLS needs you to make in order for the tool to work. For some people a couple of weeks wait for the op and some reading material seems to be enough but I suspect they're people who had already done a lot of soul searching before they approach a surgeon.
There's nothing you can do to change the way she thinks Mindy and it sounds like you've got your own struggle going on with food right now too. I've found keeping a feelings diary along side my food journal helpful because I know what was prompting certain choices and how I felt about them afterwards but seeing it written down helped. If your niece continues to eat crap even if she loses weight to start with it won't continue indefinitely I wouldn't think? Only she knows how she feels about her body plus she has to face her father knowing how much money he's spent trying to 'fix' the way she looks, that's some complicated feelings going on there no doubt. I get your frustrations but if she won't be helped there's nothing you can do.
How about your daughter? How is she finding life on the losers bench?
I agree with @Bling Babe that maturity isn't an age related thing (Lord knows I've met some very immature people in their 60's &70's!) But it doesn't sound like she's really thought about the changes WLS needs you to make in order for the tool to work. For some people a couple of weeks wait for the op and some reading material seems to be enough but I suspect they're people who had already done a lot of soul searching before they approach a surgeon.
There's nothing you can do to change the way she thinks Mindy and it sounds like you've got your own struggle going on with food right now too. I've found keeping a feelings diary along side my food journal helpful because I know what was prompting certain choices and how I felt about them afterwards but seeing it written down helped. If your niece continues to eat crap even if she loses weight to start with it won't continue indefinitely I wouldn't think? Only she knows how she feels about her body plus she has to face her father knowing how much money he's spent trying to 'fix' the way she looks, that's some complicated feelings going on there no doubt. I get your frustrations but if she won't be helped there's nothing you can do.
How about your daughter? How is she finding life on the losers bench?
countrywench
Well-Known Member
Hey Fee
She's doing amazingly well at the moment .. she seems to have embraced it and thinks forward for her day ahead which is unusual for her believe me lol ! She had an unexpected couple of days in wales to see boyfriends mum and by the time she told me she was going she was already half way there , which made me panic a bit but her next message was telling me she had all her protein powders etc all packed with her , so that surprised me ..
we are all off to family meal this evening and she loves my brothers cooking .. tonight she menu is based on the full grill with ah selection of old English puddings .. I know my limits and stick to a couple of spoons of each but more on protein .. She's already called him and requested that the cauliflower and something soup is runny enough for her and can she just have some homemade custard for dessert .. so again it sounds like she's planning ahead ..
hopefully will weigh her tomorrow or maybe tonight if she wants me to take the scales with me as we are picking her up ..
She says she feels amazing .. awake and clean is how she describes it ..
xxxxx
She's doing amazingly well at the moment .. she seems to have embraced it and thinks forward for her day ahead which is unusual for her believe me lol ! She had an unexpected couple of days in wales to see boyfriends mum and by the time she told me she was going she was already half way there , which made me panic a bit but her next message was telling me she had all her protein powders etc all packed with her , so that surprised me ..
we are all off to family meal this evening and she loves my brothers cooking .. tonight she menu is based on the full grill with ah selection of old English puddings .. I know my limits and stick to a couple of spoons of each but more on protein .. She's already called him and requested that the cauliflower and something soup is runny enough for her and can she just have some homemade custard for dessert .. so again it sounds like she's planning ahead ..
hopefully will weigh her tomorrow or maybe tonight if she wants me to take the scales with me as we are picking her up ..
She says she feels amazing .. awake and clean is how she describes it ..
xxxxx
Bling Babe
Well-Known Member
It certainly sound as if she has embraced her surgery, it's so good to hear, glad you also fighting your demons and avoiding the biscuit aisle (I love those biscuits too) has your daughter got a new boyfriend, was it this daughter that kicked out the one who was being a k@*b ? Xx
countrywench
Well-Known Member
Oh he's still most deff on the scene ..
She was glowing last night , and that's not being dramatic .. Her eyes were bright and alert , her skin looked clear and not the usual greasy shine , no spots .. she was engaging and just alive .. Told others at the dinner party that she's never felt so awake .. This is a true feeling of people after surgery isn't it ? Feeling awake and losing that slug like feeling that comes from an unhealthy diet ?
It's still early days but she's doing so well ..
As for him .. I'm hoping her weight loss and new life will see him pushed out for a better future ..
She was glowing last night , and that's not being dramatic .. Her eyes were bright and alert , her skin looked clear and not the usual greasy shine , no spots .. she was engaging and just alive .. Told others at the dinner party that she's never felt so awake .. This is a true feeling of people after surgery isn't it ? Feeling awake and losing that slug like feeling that comes from an unhealthy diet ?
It's still early days but she's doing so well ..
As for him .. I'm hoping her weight loss and new life will see him pushed out for a better future ..
countrywench
Well-Known Member
Good morning girls and boys !
Been a hectic few weeks and time is flying by ..
My weight is still exactly the same and I'm coming to peace with that .. I like the way I look in clothes , I have a good curvy shape and feel very comfy in my skin , which I don't ever remember feeling before .. TMI but I actually bought a basque and stockings , surprised hubby with the complete look and his face was a picture .. So that , as you can imagine , gave me the most massive lift in my self worth/esteem
Been to the surgery this morning , and the doctor is happy to refer me to the last knee surgeon I saw , which was in Bournemouth .. They perform knee replacements on heavier patients as my BMI is still a couple,of points to high. I was way to big before and he wasn't happy to do the op . So now I wait for an appointment
Interesting point said my doctor on the Bmi .. apparently this way of gauging was invented in 1940s and hasn't been updated at all ! Women and men now work out much much more than they did then so our body mass is totally different ..
I can never understand how my youngest's BMI , tells her she needs to lose 1 1/2st to be healthy .. she's 5ft 10" , wears size 8/10 skin tight jeans and a 10/12 size top ! She doesn't have an ounce of fat to lose or she would look extremely ill .. She is a commercial gardener so is very fit . I've put a pic of her down below in her May ball dress which was taken last Saturday .. The BMI chart is crap in my opinion ..
My eldest daughter is doing amazingly well .. Her weight is dropping at an extreme rate and she's now lost 52lbs ! Just over 3 1/2st .. she's feeling awesome also .. Feels awake and alive and full of beans .. Now realises what and how carbs do the body and mind .. She's so calm and serene as well .. Her skin is clear ,where as before she had lots of tiny pimples ..
Her work trousers now resemble and elephants baggy ass lol ! It's amazing ..
I wonder if the weight loss surgeons actually realise how they change our lives ? They see so many of us , like any medical person really , so when you go for your check ups show them your before pictures .. Mr Byrnes lovely kind eyes showed a slight recognition when I showed him my before pic .. The new lives they bestow on us is miracle like ..
Been a hectic few weeks and time is flying by ..
My weight is still exactly the same and I'm coming to peace with that .. I like the way I look in clothes , I have a good curvy shape and feel very comfy in my skin , which I don't ever remember feeling before .. TMI but I actually bought a basque and stockings , surprised hubby with the complete look and his face was a picture .. So that , as you can imagine , gave me the most massive lift in my self worth/esteem
Been to the surgery this morning , and the doctor is happy to refer me to the last knee surgeon I saw , which was in Bournemouth .. They perform knee replacements on heavier patients as my BMI is still a couple,of points to high. I was way to big before and he wasn't happy to do the op . So now I wait for an appointment
Interesting point said my doctor on the Bmi .. apparently this way of gauging was invented in 1940s and hasn't been updated at all ! Women and men now work out much much more than they did then so our body mass is totally different ..
I can never understand how my youngest's BMI , tells her she needs to lose 1 1/2st to be healthy .. she's 5ft 10" , wears size 8/10 skin tight jeans and a 10/12 size top ! She doesn't have an ounce of fat to lose or she would look extremely ill .. She is a commercial gardener so is very fit . I've put a pic of her down below in her May ball dress which was taken last Saturday .. The BMI chart is crap in my opinion ..
My eldest daughter is doing amazingly well .. Her weight is dropping at an extreme rate and she's now lost 52lbs ! Just over 3 1/2st .. she's feeling awesome also .. Feels awake and alive and full of beans .. Now realises what and how carbs do the body and mind .. She's so calm and serene as well .. Her skin is clear ,where as before she had lots of tiny pimples ..
Her work trousers now resemble and elephants baggy ass lol ! It's amazing ..
I wonder if the weight loss surgeons actually realise how they change our lives ? They see so many of us , like any medical person really , so when you go for your check ups show them your before pictures .. Mr Byrnes lovely kind eyes showed a slight recognition when I showed him my before pic .. The new lives they bestow on us is miracle like ..
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Bling Babe
Well-Known Member
Wow what an amazing figure, it really does prove that BMI should not be used as a guide, my god she would look dead if she lost any weight let alone one and a half stone.
Really fantastic news that you've finally been referred for your knee, your be running around before you know it, hubby will have to chase you round the bedroom (sorry I just couldn't resist that )
How lovely to hear you say how you are happy with your body, I hope I'll get there one day, patience patience patience
52lb that's more than good it's bloody brilliant, she must feel so good and deserves to be feel very proud. XxX
Really fantastic news that you've finally been referred for your knee, your be running around before you know it, hubby will have to chase you round the bedroom (sorry I just couldn't resist that )
How lovely to hear you say how you are happy with your body, I hope I'll get there one day, patience patience patience
52lb that's more than good it's bloody brilliant, she must feel so good and deserves to be feel very proud. XxX
vicky jenkins
Well-Known Member
Sorry ive only just read your posts.
Its a shame that your neice is not taking the food regeime seriously.
When I was doing sw I know they said that fish from the chip shop with batter removed was free but to try and avoid it as not many people can resist having the batter after.
Maybe if she had saved hard to pay for it or been months on nhs tiers she might have done differently.
Fingers crossed she changes x
Its a shame that your neice is not taking the food regeime seriously.
When I was doing sw I know they said that fish from the chip shop with batter removed was free but to try and avoid it as not many people can resist having the batter after.
Maybe if she had saved hard to pay for it or been months on nhs tiers she might have done differently.
Fingers crossed she changes x
