And so it begins...Kirsty's journey to a sleeve!!

[xk1rstyx]

Well jus got back from gp been havin anxiety for a few months now and was refusing medication cuz i was worried it wud make me look bad to hospital. I do have a history of depression an anxiety which i did tell them about.

Iv not been sleepin well recently escpecially with gettin up in night for toilet cuz all this liquid im drinking but last night i was a total mess i couldnt settle, get comfy, kept crying it was horrible i didnt drop off till after 4am an was wide awake agen at 7am so i thought enough is enough now its time to see doc for some help cuz if i carry on like this im not gna b in any state to have my op in 12 days. He gave me 2 weeks of larazapam so will hopefully settle me down.

Yesterday i took my mom to hospital appointment and we did some shopping. She then insisted on goin for a pub lunch no matter how much i protested. I jus had coffee an was thrown lots of questions about why im not eating. I have only told my husband about my op so no one else knows. Being in that awkward situation was horrible an made it hit home that im gna have to learn to deal with that especially if im gna keep my op a secret. Its gna b difficult socially for a good few months.

But even with all that stress and anxiety im still looking forward do my op an the health that will come with it.

Iv been certain of my decision for 12 months an i have fought so hard to get here so i know its the right choice an that these are jus last minute nerves which are probably exagerated by my anxiety.

Hope u are all well. On a plus not im doin great on LSD.

Kirsty xx

 

[countrywench]

Good girl Kirsty
You've taken a good choice to get the help you need..
As for telling anyone , don't ever feel guilty about it . It's a total private thing and it's basically no body else's business ..
Although not telling your mum might become awkward the longer you keep it a secret , unless you and your mum really don't get along ? She's going to pick up on your vibes and it's going to worry her . She will think your dreadfully ill ?
At least if you tell her , she won't want to go for lunch etc and might just support you ..
Mothers worry about what they don't know ..
Xxxxx

 

[FeeBee]

That all sounds really tough to deal with. Mum or not she should respect your wishes. I've not told mine in part because she helped start my problems with food (unintentionally) and partly because whatever I lost weight before even with eating disorders she was jealous. Can you just say you're trying to get health or something equally as vague but true?

Well done on going to the doctor. I can understand your concerns about how it might look but it's actually the most responsible thing to do. We're so often told WLS is a tool for the body and the brain we have to deal with ourselves and that's exactly what you are doing x

 

[Lilacglittergirl]

Aww Kirsty that was tough, but well done for standing your ground. I think once your op is done and you are on the losers' bench it might be 'wise' to tell your mum and just prepare yourself beforehand to be as strong as you are now. Wench is kind of right, your mum will worry as she sees you losing the weight and believe me the first three months or so after the bypass ain't pretty, so it is very likely she'll fret and want some answers which might be more stressful than dealing with the initial fall-out of telling her straight ... Good luck, and I am honestly so excited for you hun xxxxx

 

[xk1rstyx]

Hi every thank you for your kind words and support. Me and my mom are very close i see her every week usually more than once ee have a great relationship and i have thought about telling her. The reason i havent is because i cant trust her which may sound bad but my mom is a massive gossip and i want to keep this to private. My is the kids of person who tells people personal things i suppose i dont even thinks she realises she is doing it most the time so i know its not a nasty thing its jus how she is. If i told her she wud insist on telling my step day cuz they dont keep secrets apparently lol, she would thn av to tell my nan as they all love together, my nan wud tell her bitchy sister and probably my aunty, who would then tell both my sisters etc u see where im going haha. My husband knows and thats the way it will stay. Plus i know ignorant people will think we only lost weight cuz we had the op, an that we cheated or tool the easy option but they have no idea the hardwork n commitment it takes. Im definatly not telling anyone im going to have to learn to cope social and family occasions. And i always have you guys to talk to. This site and the people on here have been a life saver. Its brilliant being able to discuss everything and still have it kept private from real life.
I had a peak at the scales agen an there was a small loss but agen i wont say till i weigh myself on wednesday.

Im on day 11 of LSD and its so much easier now it jus feels normal. I still get hungry but it just bothers me less. 11 days till surgery. Iv got repeat pre op this tiesday as my bloods an swabs have expired.

Thanks again guys.

Kirsty xx

 

[paulam]

Aww well done on your weight loss Kirsty. You are doing very well. Still no date for me but I have just decided to leave it for a couple more weeks then I will be on their case because it will be coming to five months. Looking forward to hearing your next weight loss keep up the good work you are doing well and should have a wonderful liver at the end . PS My daughters are always telling me off for sayings things about them but most times it is only because I am proud of them lol.

 

[FeeBee]

It definitely sounds like you're in the zone now

 

[xk1rstyx]

Hi everyone i have my repeat pre op today at hospital i presume they will jis repeat bloods and swabs and i will b in and out. Im not sure if they will weigh we or not. Im gna go weigh myself on my own scales now but like u all know i dont offically weigh till tomorrow.

Kirsty xx

 

[xk1rstyx]

Surgery in 8 days if all goes to plan xx

 

[FeeBee]

Good luck!

 

[countrywench]

Lots of luck .. We will be here when you need us ..
My suggestion is to weigh in at Boots if you have one near you .. That's the only scales I rely on now .. And plus you get a little print out ticket to keep so you can see your progress

 

[Kar8858]

Good luck x

 

[xk1rstyx]

I bought new scales at the start of my journey an they give me same weight as hospital so i jus go with those. Pre op went fine it was jus bloods an swabs as iv already had my pre op. Next wednesday is my op i cant wait now i hope they dont cancel.

Kirsty xx

 

[nafpnd]

Hi Kirsty, hope your pre op went well and all the best!

 

[Lisa876]

Hope everything goes well Kirsty! Best of luck xx

 

[xk1rstyx]

Hi everything went fine thanks. I weoghed myself this morning and iv lost another 4lb so thats 13lb in 2 weeks on LSD. One more week to go an surgery time. Hopefully this time next week i will be recovering in hospital.

Kirsty xx

 

[xk1rstyx]

Tough day tho jus cooked hubby an kids a roast dinner and iv been baking a cake all day. They av all got that an iv got my milk lol xx

 

[Debs!]

Hi Kirsty - I was at the hospital today for my 1 year post op and grinned as I thought - in a few days you will be sorted. Your mum sounds lovely even with her chatterbox tendancies! It's clear you adore her. I told very, very few (3 people!) about my surgery before hand. I have to be honest with you and say it will be very hard to keep it a secret post op from those who are around you a lot. It's easy to hide from work mates etc - but when you have the Walsall 4 weeks on only liquids (not even a yoghurt) then 4 weeks of puree and then mush - you will be looking at 12 weeks of no food in front of mom? And nothing ever to drink when you are eating which almost everyone seems to hone into. Now, a year out - I can eat a bit and shove food around the plate and 'cover' my situation. First 6 months as you know - was flipping impossible! It was taking me an hour to drink a cup of tea! lol lol I am not saying any of this to be a pain in the bum or to be argumentative - but just so you can start to think of cover stories/explanations to deal with the awkward post op bits etc - after 6 months hiding isn't too bad. Even this week I have been very sick with my sleeve on 3 days - so I guess I am just worried you might struggle to have a cover story unless you get swatting up now!!!!!!!!!!! Thinking of you - wishing you the very very best. Debs xx

 

[xk1rstyx]

5 days till surgery xx

 

[xk1rstyx]

Hi debs thanks for another wise and supportive post. As always u have words of wisdom. How did your visit at manor go are they pleased with you.
Im lookin forward to my op just want it to be over with now.

Kirsty xx