bypass daily menu -

[chrisa]

nice menu xx

 

[amanda577]

Hi everyone!!! Well I managed to lose 3lbs this week, but in truth I don't deserve to have lost anything at all.... I am so shocked with myself and what I have done I just have to put it into words and tell you guys, even if you hate me afterwards.... I don't know how, where or why, but today I went out and bought a chocolate sponge cake and a bottle of lucozade and just literally scoffed the lot!!! It was like I was on auto pilot I just ate it , just how I wouldve eaten it before the bypass, and afterwards I had my first dumping session, I sweated and shook, I was sick and my heart was racing and I basically passed out for a couple of hours!! It was scary, but not so scary as knowing that I still have that overwhelming need to binge eat even though I know the harm it could do me.. How could I just do that?? to put myself through surgery and be doing so well and then throw it all away like that.. I never realised what a weak gluttonous person I really am..
Well sorry but had to tell someone, I know you will all be shocked.... I am so scared now that I will be the one who fails... Very very ashamed and depressed right now..

 

[shelleymarie]

Oh Amanda, sounds so self destructive and almost self harming as you knew you were going to feel horrendous after that. That's really worrying hun, please stop feeling like a failure, mucking up once doesn't mean you will again but you do need to stay on top of things so you don't. Do you think you could talk to your team? Or your GP. Am I remembering right that you have depression? is everything ok in that area? were you maybe feeling depressed before hand or reckless? so maybe your gp would be a good idea. Hope you are ok hun, you really must stop beating your self up and move on to make sure it doesn't happen again otherwise it will become a spiral. I'm hoping that dreadful dumping session is enough to put your off for life! take care of yourself xxx

 

[amanda577]

Thanks for the understanding comments shelleymarie. I do suffer with depression, I am bi polar also and my lithium levels have been all over the place since the surgery so my moods have really been up and down. You are right, it was totally self destructive. It's how I used to eat, and it scared me so much to know that I still had that capacity for gluttony.. ... while I was eating, didnt care about the harm or anything I was just on auto pilot almost.. I had to just put it down in the forum, put it into words to try and make some sense of it.. I think maybe I need to phone my psychiatric nurse, and see if she can hurry through my medication review with my psychiatrist so i can stabilise my moods again... But not making excuses... I bought the cake and I ate it.. and I made myself ill. Thank you for not condemning me though Shelleymarie.. I do feel very very ashamed... I don't think my bariatric team would be of much help as they don't really deal with the psychological side of all this...

 

[shelleymarie]

Yes I thought it was bipolar but didn't want to say in case I was wrong but my mum has bipolar and she suffers from diabetes, occassionally when she is cycling she will do self destructive things/reckless behaviour like eat a whole giant bag of sweets even though she knows it will make her feel so ill so I completely understand where you are from and do think it is a good idea to talk to your cpn and see if they can do more to stabilise your lithium levels. Post bypass it is really hard to know if you are absorbing your medication ok so maybe there is a problem there. I know you aren't making excuses hun, I know you take responsibility for your actions which is important but it's also important and responsible to do everything you can to make sure you don't do it again and calling your cpn is a good step, even if it's just someone else to talk too and get to the root to the cause when you are doing really well till now. Like I said though, take care of yourself and don't beat yourself up any more as it will be really hard to move on otherwise xx

 

[amanda577]

The last 3 blood tests for lithium levels have come back extremely low so the doctor is quite concerned.. It was a risk they discussed with me before the bypass that lithium would not be absorbed properly, and I will probably have to be put onto sodium valproate instead.. But I think I need to try and hurry that process along a little rather than wait for the wheels to turn.. I know you are right, and I must just move on from this and deal with it.. Thanks for understanding.. xx

 

[shelleymarie]

No problem, I hope you can manage to get them to do more to sort it out for you. Hope you get a good night sleep tonight and feel much better in the morning xx

 

[chrisa]

Hi Amanda. wots done is done, it wasn't good and you knew it, you paid the price and at some point most of us will have or will do summat similar, being able to admit it to people is the best way forward, if you notice my menus i often put on if i av had a cake or biscuit, it makes me think bout wot i am doing. Self awareness does help and like Shelley said do chase up the help it is out there, and hope they get you sorted soon. Idont know why but sometimes i could be like that but can hear my innerself saying you are not hungry, don't have it. Istill crave some sweet stuff i fancied a cream slice the other day d got a box of 6 cream cakes from m n s i cut it up into small slices bout 7 i had 2 slices and gave the rest away, sometimes if i find myself doin that i jusp pick it up and put it in the bin. My mind likes me to have carbs on every meal, sometimes i put them on n just leave them til last and too ful to have them. you have to try and find ways round this, you can and will move on from here. xx

 

[Minoots]

Before my bypass I was always constipated and on more than one occasion had to go to hospital for enema... not nice... As it has been a life long problem I could never fix it with diet alone.. No matter what I tried.
Since my op 7 months ago I have been regular once a day... Not sure what they did but something is different.. Now if I have to go... I have to go immediately and can't 'hold on' much. But I am grateful for the change in pattern. One thing though my poo's colour is pale yellow to light Gray!! I have asked about it but just get strange looks
I can honestly relate to anyone who suffers and I did find that movicol every day did help but it is a slow help and has to be taken for ages before a result
Have you tried to get an enema from the chemist? Not many sell them but they are out there!
Good luck and I hope it soon sorts itself out xxxx

 

[amanda577]

Thanks for being so honest chrisa!! I am going to draw a line under it and move on.. It helped just being able to write it down on here... I think it just shocked me so much to think I was still so close to going back to old eating habits and so suddenly.. I am going to have a day on fluids today just to be kind to my pouch and when I see my cpn Monday I will ask her to try and hurry through my medication review. Thanks to you all for not condemning me though!! xx

 

[amanda577]

Forgive me if I'm wrong minoots, but I read somewhere that if your poo is grey and devoid of any yellow or brown colour then it was a good idea to get a liver function test done as it could mean that you are not producing enough bile or bilirubin to colour it. But it could mean something totally different in a post bypasser maybe.. xxxx

 

[handbag-annie]

Oh Amamda, bless you! I love this thread as you are all so open and honest about your struggles. I can only agree with the others in that what's done is done and hopefully the memory of the dumping will prevent you doing it again. You have done so amazingly well since your op, so just keep thinking about that rather than being hard on yourself.

Big hugs xx

 

[shelleymarie]

I agree Annie, another reason to love this thread is the honesty and that people can post without fear. No one would ever encourage mistakes or say it's ok but I've found that at least people know when they've made one and then the only thing to do from there is to encourage moving on wards and downwards. Focusing on the positives and learning from our errors is the only way to do that

Menu for today -
Breakfast - Fruit salad.
Lunch - Boiled egg and ham sandwich. Made with one slice of bread.
Dinner - Left over home made low fat chicken tikka and broccoli.
Snack - Mini babybel light.

 

[amanda577]

Thank you for all the support & advice guys.. ... No one else I know apart from the people on here would even be able to begin to understand how hard this whole thing is sometimes.. I have to be hard on myself, because if not then I might just end up back where I started and that can't happen.. I know some of what happened yesterday with the cake was definitely a very rapid mood swing, but even so I am going to have to get to grips with that because it cannot happen again.. I have had a day on just fluids, but nice fluids.. Lots of veggie and chicken soup, and a really yummy fruit smoothie. I think this whole episode has just reminded me that I mustn't get complacent as it is far too easy to slip into old habits definitely for me anyway, and I really don't want to be the one who fails...

 

[Paula Garner]

Just keep going Amanda, none of us are perfect and I'm sure we will all slip up at some point xx

Today's Menu

B - WW bacon and mushroom omlette (2 eggs).
L - 4 x Melba toast, tuna + onion.
T - 100g of grilled chicken with salad.
S - Petit Filous strawberry mousse.

Tea x 2, Filter coffee x 2, 1 pint of nas squash, water. 83 grams of protein today, woo hooo !!

 

[chrisa]

Yes I totally agree with all the comments it is soo very easy to fall at the hurdle, but recognising the fact helps, eventually you will be able to approach that recognittion as it starts off not at the point when you are already doing it, then you can intercept that thought process and start to work on ways of stoppin git happen you will recognise the signs earlier and be able to conquer it we have to walk before we can run. We had our wls meet today and it was said just how difficult it is day to day with bypass and sleeve etc, it is not a quick fix we have to work with it and use it to our advantage ITS UPTO US TO EDUCATE PEOPLE. It will never be plain sailing but we have to find a way that we can live. x

 

[amanda577]

Hi everyone.. Hope you all had a good weekend.... I'm off the fluids and back onto normal food again today, and looking forwards not back now...
Todays menu:
B 100mls skim milk
L 2 crackerbreads & 20gm L/F philly, sliced chicken
D 150gm Sirloin steak, brussel sprouts
S Cucumber with L/F Pate
S Satsuma

Protein 73gms - Cals 590 - Carbs 28gms - Fat 16gms
Drinks - 2 litres NAS - 1 litre water - cup black coffee - 50 mls prune juice

 

[shelleymarie]

Great menu Amanda, great to see you moving forwards, it's all we can do

My menu for today -
Breakfast - fruit salad.
Lunch - Prawn Salad.
Dinner - Chicken, sprouts, gravy.
Snack - Mini babybel light.

My dinner came straight back up last night again, not sure what that is about. Totally random again. Feel fine otherwise.

 

[Paula Garner]

Nice menus girls. Glad your ok Amanda xx Here's mine for today.

B - 2 x whole grain ryvita with laughing cow light.
L - 1/2 a pork chop, broccoli, swede, carrot, gravy.
T - Same as above.
S - 1/2 a banana, petit filous yogurt.

Drinks. Tea, coffee, water and NAS squash.

 

[chrisa]

Todays menu-

B dry granola with a cuppa
S grapes
L shepherds pie (mince and onion, small amount of potato, cheese) cabbage and carrots.
D SMALL spoon rice and beef in black bean sauce that was left over from lastnight, courtesy of my daughter.
tea, tea n tea