been to meeting, Ive lost more weight.. not sure if good or bad, but as we are on a WLS surgery site.. woohoo!!! BMI is now 25.2 Im still overweight, and Im happy with that.
The team saw me today and are on the quest to find my notes and temp notes. A new file has been created today. Pleased with my progress. Pleased to hear food intake increased. Pleased to see my Dennis the Meance hair is taking over my head. Pleased to see me showing me "strong assertive yet positive and constructive side".
They think i have a gastro-oesophagial stricture or hiatal hernia thats preventing me from eating properly. This can be caused by a number of things such as acid reflux, endoscopy procedures and long term nasal jenunum feeding tubes. The hernias could have formed when the stents were removed as the stents were sited and tissue grew up through them like roses and trellis. However when stents were removed, they were pulled apart and may have caused tissue tearing etc..
Today has been a good food day for me, I managed to eat around 2fl oz home made carrot and corriander soup. and thats it.
Only way to explain it, is that the back of my throat burns, (and my stomach when i eat) and my throat feels like Ive licked a dog a few times - somethings clogged but nothings there??
I know when i was in hospital I had stents and the feed tube, and couldnt swallow my own saliva for around 3 months. had to keep spitting out 4 times a minute - disgusting and degrading. turns out the prob was caused by the stents - my stomach lining had grown up through it and was in my throat. They think that the stricture is possibly caused by this same thing again as it can grow back.
Wont know until get the upper gi gastroendoscopy of my oesophagus, stomach, colon and bowel done. no idea why they wanna do all that but its got to be done. my last barium swallow showed I have a slight kink in my stomach.
Being booked in for new gastrocopy, appointment will be sent out monday morning, if they get a cancellation for in the week Ill goto it. My consultant will be present. Ive had a meeting with the dieticien whilst in clinic and Ive been put on a high fibre /protein diet and told to try lay off on the brocolli a bit. Eat a variety of beans and pulses, up protein, increase dairy intake. All well and good if u can stomach it for longer than 30 seconds. I want to eat it, I cook it, drool whilst cooking it, serve it up, make it look pretty, come to eat it and in kicks the eating impotence! Game over.. full.. try abit more.. sick.Other times I have a mouthful and im sick.
Got praised by my manager at work today for my effort and determination to keep trying stuff and for just coming in to work, getting my head down and getting on with it even though its not always easy to do so. Had a catch up chat, with her and Service delivery manafer and Ive been told Ive got their full support if I need anything. If I need more time off, theyll accomodate it where poss, however will keep fingers crossed the gastroscopy fixes things.
Looking forward to tomorrow! I shall joyride into Wolverhampton town before 9am, get some bits and bobs including almond milk, pick up my moms mothers day present, get back home to Walsall by 10am.. if it rains Ill have to take the scary peasant wagon again
Ive not purchased a card this year, Ive set my inner child free and made my own using print outs of several pics of mom and I from when I was a kid and over the last year, paint, glue (lots of it) glitter (buckets load! and ribbons. Just got to wait for it to dry and make the insert with the nice words on it.
This time last year (downt o the day) I was readmitted vomitting blood. Blood pouring out my ears, nose, other orifaces, couldnt breathe, eat, drink, and I was waiting to die. My brothers went to the shop on site at teh hospital and brought any old card they could find for me to write because we didnt think Id be here for the day. I couldnt write, hold a pen, my brothers had to hold my hand and help me write it. I had to try tell them what I wanted to say and they guided me to write it like you do a 2 year old. Every movement hurt, but we did it together even though I could barely sit up and keep my eyes open.
I sit here today in my living room, on my armchair I never used to be able to fit in, like a pixie on a toadstool, legs crossed nice and cosey in front of the heater making a mess. Paint on my head, bits everywhere. Im not dying, dead, on me last legs or anything like it. Im excited, content and today Im happy (yes I heard your big gasps!) Im looking forward to a few things for the first time in ages. Yes theres ups and downs, but what will be will be.. This year Im having no poopy card!
Ive scoured loads of shops, card shops, asda, tesco, and I cant find THE card for my mom. Nothing seems appropriate enough. So We have the Blue Peter jobby and Im proud of it. Just trying to get the words I want to say out on to paper now. Cant sum it up, but I will somehow figure it out. Ill figure it all out one way or another.
Its like that whole "meaning of life" thing my nan used to keep telling me about. I finally think I get it. What it is, and what it means to me. Dont want to get too confident bc they reckon when youve cracked it, you croak.. so naaa havnt figured it out yet!
I hope you lovely ladies and gents have a great evening and weekend, and will catch up with you soon. Busy girl these days! well for 48 hours.. got to clean the flat before my landlord comes tomorrow afternoon. Looks like a bombs hit the place (all this mess trying to find a pair of bike gloves to have me mom call and say "your bike gloves are here.. do u need em??") so far 3 hours cleaning it up and nowhere near done.
Me ? personality?!?! oi oi! youll make me had swell too big I wont get through the door again haha!
Ok.. I also got to remember to get me shoes and the biggy.. enjoy living, loving and having fun. Hope you do the same too x x
