Weekly weigh in

[penelope1008]

The 5 miles is basically my daily wanderings around home, to & from work & around work so not necessarily aerobic but it's exercise & can be fast depending how quickly I have to get across school to my next lesson & how many times I have to walk from one side to the other or how many times I have to mount the stairs. So not quite the same as a proper power walk.

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[penelope1008]

An air walker is the name a catalogue has given something that's a cross between a treadmill & cross trainer. Supposedly helps tone legs, buttocks, abs& upper body or just lower body if set to static also folds flat so easy to get in & out I hope.

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[penelope1008]

The air walker has arrived & been built as its fold away its decorated the bedroom so far this week so last night I set it up so its staring at me ready to use if I go to bed early & snuggle up without having done at least 15mins on it preferably longer. I need to as I regained half a pound this week not much but if I'm maintaining or on a stall I don't want the creep back up to start.
Not sure where my focus has gone but I need to find it again, I can only assume that the fact work has taken up a lot of my time for the last few weeks, plus worries about my eldest son as he is struggling with his mental health problems a bit at the moment are reasons or excuses for not being as focussed as I should be. Lets hope I can get a balance & some me time to refocus & get back on track.

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[Miss Tickle]

Eating won't help though love, though the occasional treat might help stop your spirits falling. I'm sending you cyber hugs and very best wishes and hope life settles down soon xxx
p.s Half a pound is not a gain- it is wind !!

 

[penelope1008]

Thanks miss tickle I love the wind idea, I know letting the old demons get an upper hand isn't the answer but as you know I'm sure sometimes it's just to hard a fight when everything is beyond tough. But I have to find those boot straps & give them & myself a good pull up & stop this becoming worse than it is. I think I'm so close to my target a mix of self sabotage & thinking excess skin is going to stop me getting there aren't helping with my focus but I'm in a pit right now emotionally struggling to get out, I'll get there just need to find the right focus & get myself sorted. Once I've had sometime to myself & some introspection I might find it or someone to speak to to help me sort my head out to get me there.

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[chrisa]

Think a lot of us are in there with ya, just when its bad can only see yourself down there, hard to look around and see others struggling with similar problems and in similar situations. Things can only get better and we have to rise up at some point can't go any lower the only way is up xx

 

[penelope1008]

Today I've been that stressed out that I was ready to kill my year 11's after lunch, who couldn't follow instructions let alone my yr10's before lunch, we had a walk through fire drill during their lesson I gave them clear instructions on our exit route & reminded them of the silence & single file rule did they listen did they heck as like, back in class with 5 mins if the lesson to run, can we sit & chat ? No listen to guidance on how to do homework finding the primes under 100, waste of time there, one in detention for failure to bring in homework, detentions threatened for failing to follow instructions, what a waste of time & space. Year 11's have workbooks explaining every step they need to do on their coursework spent the lesson miss what do I do? how do I do? With others butting in with comments ultimately wrong not following instructions when I could talk without interruption. I was ready to kill at the end of the lesson, thank god I calmed down by the time I reached the next lesson with yr 7's. thank god for the weekend. With luck it's just a crap weeks sleep, combined with a crap busy week last week it feels as if I've been back for a term rather than 2 & a bit weeks. Time management just isn't happening I really need to learn to delegate some of this stuff to the other faculty TA so I can reduce my stress levels before I blow it.
Here's hoping I can manage some r&r to go back Monday in a calmer more organised frame of mind.

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[chrisa]

Sounds bit like my day n I had no fire drill but it will be imminent with the new yr 7's in. I had a 1-1 last lesson with a young lad yr 10, sposed to be in s studies but p5 on a friday they just do pe outside so no need for me, but has pulled kid out to do num and lit with me, neva told im tho, just left it to me. told im this mornin ohh did he flip, we worked well together last year but he was desparate to play footy, by the time p5 came no kid. Had to go nd look he was changed for pe wouldnt come out so staff made him wot a strop poor kid. He stomped all tha way down took me 10 mins to calm him down then was a pussy cat, typical that though staff doing that wont cope with them kicking off but we have to the less paid of course. WE have struck a bargain and he is ok with it now, we will work but make it fun as well. He has returned a more mature young person so something must be working. WE get them all don't we.xx Just another day at the funny farm. xx

 

[penelope1008]

Yep we do 5 out of my 8 yr10's have statements I get a TA but 2 lessons she's pulled for lunch or break duty so I have no one while she has a break.. My yr 11's have less focus than a broken camera lens. One supposedly has OCD & is on meds but I doubt they are working but whatever it is is getting worse not better. High maintainence (the nick name of the teacher I've mentioned before), insists that she hasn't had time to do any thing since ofsted as she was so stressed & then so angry & now has far to much else to do since they left so hasn't marked tests I need results for for the kids were taking out, but of course I can drop everything to solve her query as to where I got info from on a kid in her top set implying he needed to come out, let alone give up half my lunch break to finish two certificates & some call sheets for said kids. As you say blooming typical of some teachers, some are great but others we are just the magicians that do a lot of their job for them to gain the credit for a fraction of the pay. I've exam lists to confirm, parents evening shortly for yr11's another late finish, yr8 & 9 work books to create & distribute only 150 to do, plus the remaining 66 yr7 books to get out to. I think I'll be in late one evening getting those sorted. I've been stealing tutor time to get little jobs done but from next week it's morning challenge callouts to supervise so that gained time is gone. Hey ho things will calm down soon despite the inevitable fire drill without pre-warning now the new kids know what to do as a walk through, lets have a spontaneous practice where know one knows if its a drill or real.
Off to bed now, may hit the air walker or may just hit the pillow, have a long list of home todos for the weekend to find some energy for tomorrow!

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[chrisa]

Thinkl we'll av to do a school swap hahaxx enjoy tha weekend xx

 

[Yvessa]

I think it's ridiculous! We don't order TAs around - they are there to support the kids not us.

 

[chrisa]

Not so much teachers Yve its the senior leadership team/assistant heads and head, treat us like slaves sometimes the staff do off load undesirables onto us at times the ones they don't want to entertain. I know some of them disrupt the class, but thats what you have trained for to deal with a class full of pupils of all abilities and all individuals no matter what behaviour, we hav ehad some training but not the same as ateacher yet we are expected to take them out and take them on and get results. xx Not getting at you though luvva just the odd few do it. xx

 

[Yvessa]

I know what you mean. And sadly it does happen. I try my best to provide an environment and a working relationship with TAs in my classro where they can feedback to me and get support if they need it.

 

[penelope1008]

As I typed this yvessa I made sure I typed some teachers as on the whole teachers do their best to work with the ta's that support in their classes as well as support the ta's sadly as in any job there are good & bad teachers & good & bad ta's the bad in either side taint things for the good. I did not want to give the impression that all teachers are tyrants & all ta's angels because I know there are exceptions on both sides. Sadly some people still look on us as the mums army filling in time while their kids are in school, this teacher is one of those despite being an ex ta herself & although she was made to apologise for a crack like that she made in my presence to other teachers last term,( teacher colleagues complained to senior management not me), she still keeps pushing the boundaries & is keen to be seen as a fantastic person saving all the under achievers all on her own (to warrant her extra point for KS3 responsibilities), what ever help she gets / demands from others on her way up isn't mentioned. I'm all for progressing your career & helping the kids achieve their best but not at the cost of trampling on others & stressing the kids out. My apologies if I offended you Yvessa..

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[Yvessa]

No not at all honey! I know that generally TAs love working with me and I try to go the extra mile to include them in lessons and lesson planning where possible. So like ou say good and bad teachers. Just a bit shocked at how bad some are.

 

[penelope1008]

Yeah, but I think sometimes they don't think or realise what they do can cause upset be they teacher or TA. Sadly this teacher I'm dealing with is an ex TA turned teacher, who despite a physiology degree isn't a people person it's her point of view or its wrong. She's spitting feathers as she didn't get outstanding for her ofsted observed lesson. She was close but no cigar as 3 kids weren't seen as achieving & she under used her TA me! She ranted & raved all lunchtime after her feedback & still is, she spent last weekend compiling a letter to ofsted voicing her opinion that their criteria etc. was wrong & why. She's yet to send it as we are still waiting for our grade the inspectors were arguing still at the meeting & despite the report being due last weds or Thursday but is still not here, so she's waiting for that first. I'm no angel & far from perfect as a human being let alone a HLTA but I do hope I'm not as bad as she comes across.

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[Yvessa]

To be honest I know the type. Just rise above- life's too short and we ate under enough pressure as it is in teaching.

 

[penelope1008]

She's definately not worth it just I think a bad weeks sleep plus the week befores' madness of ofsted, late finishes, early starts all caught up with me.
Got stressed & things crowded in on top.with luck I can catch up with myself & even learn to delegate a bit to the other faculty TA. Learning curve time again, need to learn that skill rather than being arrogant enough to think I have to be Wonder Woman & do it all myself, whilst looking after her as she's only 20 & I don't want her to feel overwhelmed if I dump things on her as well as her timetable. I know in my early years as a TA it was easy to feel like I was drowning under the work load or lack of guidance & support.
I'm 47 it's about time I grew up & learnt to let things go if they get to me they're not worth stressing over.

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[chrisa]

Easier said than done Pen, I am 47 in December so you sound very much like me, we try n look after others but doing that we overload ourselves, I think to be Ta's and teachers people need to be people persons if they can't get on with people thye should not be workn in that environment, and there is nothing worse than someone Lording it ova you that is crap at their job but like to blame others for it xx Hope we all have a better week. xx

 

[ryanrara]

lost some more weight, I have now lost 11.6 stone (160 pounds) and currently way 17.3 stone. happy days. Year surgiversary on Saturday.