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Oodles' Weekly Weigh In

Thank you :)

Planning my outfit for Saturday now! I just wish it was warmer. I'm so cold these days! I want to wear a onesie! Perhaps I will dust off THE dress. I'm so desperate to wear it. With a fleece on top lol.

And we've booked another murder mystery for May. I have the perfect polka dot dress to wear (the theme is Grease), bought a neck scarf and horn rimmed glasses. It was a bit tight when I bought it, bet it's too loose in May :( the downside to weight loss!
 
I just been sitting in a coffee house with a small skinny latte reading through your entire diary . Made me lol in places and tear up in others .
You've lost an incredible amount of weight ! Did you even think that this time last year you would be a different person ?
I am just on the beginning of my journey . A band is being fitted on 5th April , so I'm on the liver shrink diet at the moment and have lost a ridiculous 10lbs in under a week ! So I had to pop into sainsburys ( on my mobility scooter which I hope I can soon get rid of ) and treated myself to a small coffee instead of a breakfast ..
Do you have any updated pics ?
You should be so massively proud of how you've done and how far you have come as a strong impressive woman ..
As for the office crush ? Ask him for a coffee .. If he says no then it's his loss that he won't get to know how funny you are and how well you can communicate . Totally his loss and he doesn't deserve you . He probably farts in bed and has smelly feet anyway hahaha !
Mindy
Xxxxxxx
 
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Ah that's so sweet Mindy!!

Well this time last year I was only just considering surgery I think. But I'm glad I did it, even if it was a quick decision. It's just changed my entire belief in myself. And also helped me with some revelations. E.g. Past relationships. I've always preferred men who were a little distant, who wore the trousers as such. And had no respect for men who adored me and dribbled all over me. I realised recently the reason I saw these latter men as wet and pathetic was because I didn't have respect for anyone who found me desirable, and saw them as lesser men because why would anyone want me? Is their self esteem so low that they put ME on a pedestal? I used to think I had a high opinion of myself but actually it was because of my own low self esteem that I couldn't deal with these boys. When I do start dating again it will be very interesting as I hope I feel worthy if I do find someone who adores me!!

I don't feel I'm different as such, but that I'm back - if that makes sense. I mean there are definitely experiences I've never had before - life is more colourful now and for the first time in my life I don't want to hide in the shadows and be anonymous. I find the situation I've put myself in these past few years just so claustrophobic and I'm so ready to start again as who I really am. Last week every day I went to work and sat in silence. Then left work, went home, and sat in silence. There were days where I literally spoke to no-one. I deserve better. And now I feel I can do better when I get the new job, build up relationships with people again. I've always known this, hence the reason I had the op. But now I have the confidence to go get it. Woop!

I wish you the very best of luck on your journey Mindy, you sound very excited and I'm sure everything will go perfectly for you!! I need to go find your diary so I can subscribe - because I mostly come on here via the app it's tricky to find all the threads by different people. 10lb in a week is amaze - it has begun!!
 
Well my mum's scales weren't lying! I'm in the 14s! Mazin. My size 18 trousers are a bit loose... size 16 here I come! Eek!

That's a total of 170lb lost, with 48lb left to go to my goal of a normal BMI.

Had my op 9 months and 2 days ago. Yay!
 
Your incredible well done !
 
Not much to report loss-wise this week, but a few new developments life-wise!

- wore a skirt to work and felt it was too long! (Calf length.) I feel my inner hussy is emerging ;)
- wearing THE dress for the murder mystery on Saturday! So excited. My weight loss has mostly been documented by the photos of the murder mysteries I attend lol. And I haven't been to one since the wedding in Dec! It was really awks at the wedding when one of the actors mentioned my weight loss - while in character! She is one of my faves of the troupe but she won't be there on Saturday, which I'm quite relieved about. Although she'll probably be at the one in May. I'm going semi fancy dress to that one. I don't care if no-one else does! I've already got my outfit and it's so cute... IF I can walk in the shoes, that is.
- I told my boss on Tuesday about my decision to leave. He mentioned several interim options, all of which I'm potentially excited about. He's just so lovely and is trying to keep me, though he understands my reasons for going. He's getting back to me next week most likely after he's met with the big bosses. If any of the options work out I'll be able to sell the house, finish the new one and still have a salary coming in! Which is such a relief. And leads me onto the next point...
- in possibly the worst financial decision ever made, I bought a new car last weekend! Pick her up on Saturday. Eep. It's a congratulatory present to myself for weight loss, new life on the horizon, birthday, and any other excuse I can muster lol.
- for my next trip to Dublin, I'm finally brave enough to fly instead of drive. It's Ryanair which I've never flown with before, and although I'll have to pack my belt extender I'm hoping I won't need to use it. Downside: I'll be a pedestrian for a week! But the weeks got messed up and I can't make the drive from my hometown as the weekend I get back I'm making my annual pilgrimage to...
- A club night in London! For a very specific purpose. And this year I'm planning to party the night away instead of being in physical pain by the time the disco comes at the end of the night! Usually my hips just kill me. The first year I almost crawled to the car. My (not overweight) friend was in a similar amount of pain due to his back so perhaps I will still hurt lol. Our annual tradition is this: park in Soho, get a burger at this diner, queue at the club, stand for several hours then stagger back and collapse in the car about 1am. Last year on the day of the party was when I told him about my plans for the op, and in the diner he looked sad as we wouldn't be able to go this year. But I've googled and I can just get a plain burger without the bun, and it's ok calorie wise. So, sorted! Although I also saw the nutrition for the meal I had last year. Horrific!!
- I've bought some size 16 things from eBay, which should come next week. Fingers crossed I can get them on me! The too tight clothes I bought on holiday are becoming breathable. :) and the ones which were too small when I packed are now too big :(

In negative news, I discovered a stash of sugar free biscuits in the cupboard. Doh! Have had to throw them away as I had like 5. Hmm wonder why I've not lost weight this week!! I've also been trying to eat more, as I really don't get my protein in. So I've upped my work intake to two yoghurts instead of one, and yesterday got a tuna salad (no dressing) from the restaurant. Also been stuffing my face with the turkey stuff I made last week for dinner. But while I want to eat more, the scales haven't moved so perhaps minimal is the way to go.
 
Can't wait to see your dress !
 
Holding back the celebrations. Checked the skirt brand's website, it says on their size guide a 16 waist is 32.5 ins, which I ain't! But it definitely says 16 on the skirt... I'm so confused. According to their size guide I should be a 20 but my 20 skirts in that brand fall off me.

What is going on :(
 
Wear it with you head held high .. Cut the label out and don't worry ..
I sure you'll knock em dead !
 
Well I had a few more parcels awaiting me after work. 2 pairs of size 16 cropped jeans - one wearable (even if my calves get stuck!), one which might do up if only I could get them up!! Pretty sure you're not sure to put jeans on like tights lol!

1 size 18 work jacket which fits nicely and might look good with pair of jeans #1, and some random t shirts which came with jeans #2. A size 16 (too small) and a size 14 (too baggy!).

All in all, a revelation and a reminder that sizes are very brand specific!!
 
We won the murder mystery! Will post the pic once they've uploaded them :) I did wear the dress and felt very pretty. I'm sat down in the photo so don't know how it will look, but I'll be sure to share.

Went to matalan today for some new work troos. Nothing suitable (waist fine but no slouch/wide leg!) but did get a denim skirt and a lovely coral vest thing. I guess I'm a 16 now! Woop!!
 
We won the murder mystery! Will post the pic once they've uploaded them :) I did wear the dress and felt very pretty. I'm sat down in the photo so don't know how it will look, but I'll be sure to share. Went to matalan today for some new work troos. Nothing suitable (waist fine but no slouch/wide leg!) but did get a denim skirt and a lovely coral vest thing. I guess I'm a 16 now! Woop!!
fantastic X
 
I'm really chuffed for you ! Well done ! Can't wait to see the pic
Mindy
Xxx
 
I will do a photo comparison when they've released the pics :)

In preparation for this, last night I cropped some old photos of theirs from when I was bigger and I didn't actually recognise myself. I must have been in denial all my life. It was like seeing a stranger. I remember the outfits I was wearing and thinking I looked quite nice. I guess I've always seen myself as smaller than I was - perhaps a 24? But at my heaviest I was only just squeezing into a 32. It's like I can see myself clearly now, at least I can see what everyone else used to see. I'm not quite there yet in my own head at a 16, in that when I see photos of myself I tend to be surprised at how I look. And when I try on clothes I feel they're never going to fit - and then they (sometimes) do. Weird innit.

I'm happy at the size I am now. If I get smaller then fine, if I stay this size, also fine. I've not been a size 10 probably since I was 10 years old, so that's not a size I've ever seen myself being. I have 10 more lb to lose until I'm out of the 'obese' bmi category. It would be nice to just be 'overweight' officially, but I don't want my face to get wrinkly.

My grandma showed my photo with big bird to her carer who thought I was 12 lol. My grandma corrected her and told her I was 22. I said actually I'm 33! And she couldn't believe it lol. So while I'm not old, I'm not exactly young and seeing as the skin under my clothes is a right mess I don't have much faith in the skin on my face! So perhaps a 10 is not for me. We'll see how it goes obviously but I've been considering allowing more calories to slow the weight loss a bit. My arms and legs are never going to look normal without surgery anyway so it's not like I'm aiming for a bikini or anything. I'll see over the summer how I feel and how much I lose.
 
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